Phoenix
by RikaAltraz
Summary: A girl who lost her brother, but gained the ability to heal herself and never die. Betrayed, thrown into Deadman Wonderland, at least she has the relief of knowing there is nothing they can do to really keep her down. But she's terrified of the rumors and hell, until one of the worst Deadmen saves her from a painful fate. Now, she does have something to fear in here. Losing love.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One  
** It's been several months now since Deadman Wonderland has been in operation.  
They hadn't gotten wind of me until today.  
Until I had someone betray me.  
Ever since I got through that event with my new gifts, I"d been trying to help people with it.  
Being able to heal others with my now freakish blood was pretty amazing.  
I wanted to give back to the people who had helped me survive.  
My brother died so that I could live.  
Sometimes I think I can still feel the rebar pricking me as it stabbed through him.  
His body had become my shield.  
He was so badly wounded, but somewhere in him, he had found the strength to lift the concrete on him enough for me to get free.  
His eyes started to go dull, but he had looked at me and said: this is what brothers are for, protecting their little sisters.  
When he died and collapsed, I sat there holding his hand, crying, until the older couple from next door found me.  
They helped me bury him properly, and then brought me into their secret community after the disaster.  
I was still young then.  
Now I'm twenty four and they are dead.  
But when my power first started surfacing, they hadn't feared me.  
I guess because it seemed like it wasn't a dangerous power.  
Mira had said it was as if my brother had sunk into my blood and was going to protect me for life.  
Maybe she was right.  
I had survived some horrible things since then in the name of helping others.  
I've broken bones, lost pieces of my body, even died a couple times now.  
Depending on the severity of the damage, it took either a short or long time to heal up.  
Longest was when a gang had chopped me up alive, wondering how many pieces they could take from me before I died.  
Then they buried me.  
It took almost a month to reform myself bit by bit. I ended up having to regrow my left arm after finding it eaten by insects.  
Honestly, the wounds and dying aren't so bad. It hurts, but that I can live with. No pun intended.  
The worst is the sensation of being ever present. I'm not having any out of body experiences when I die. I feel it as my blood pulls my body back together.  
I can sleep it off I suppose, depending how long it takes to heal.  
Oh well, back to the matter at hand.  
Becoming a Deadman.  
Now that Hachi betrayed me, they brought me in.  
He apparently didn't tell them what I could do.  
I suppose that is alright then.  
I stood still as the doctor measured me and poked and prodded me.  
She seemed like a bitch.  
She finally waved at the guards and a collar was fitted on.  
Keeping my blank facade was probably a good thing.  
She said something about me fitting right in.  
With murderers?  
No thanks.  
I felt a slight prick in my neck and my blood jammed it to seal.  
The guards must have noticed whatever the collar was not doing because they stopped me from continuing on.  
"What does your blood do?" They asked.  
"Nothing useful to this place." I said.  
"Why isn't the collar working?"  
I shrugged.  
"It should be piercing your skin to keep readings of your bios." The smaller, seemingly smarter one said.  
"Ah." I nodded. I reached up and went to take it off.  
They stepped back.  
I felt it try to stab me again as a timer began counting down.  
I gritted my teeth as a liquid poured into my neck as I managed to unclip the collar.  
"You just committed suicide."  
I tilted my head, feeling the burning rush in my veins as whatever poison was in the collar was eaten by my blood.  
It always burned as I healed.  
I held out the collar again to them.  
"My body won't allow you to inject anything into me. My blood prevents it." I said.  
"Then stop it."  
I shook my head.  
"Not how my power works. I'm not sure what you guys are used to dealing with in G Block, but I can't just turn off my ability. It's a lifetime effect." I shrugged.  
"To heal yourself?" The bigger man asked.  
I nodded.  
"Show us."  
He held out a knife, obviously trusting enough that I was being serious.  
I took it and sliced through my arm.  
It stung, but my blood didn't pour. It was thick and sealed the cut and mended the skin as if nothing happened.  
"I'll send a report to the boss and the doctor." The smaller said.  
I shrugged.  
"We're supposed to get a collar on her and take her to her new room."  
"And she handed the collar back after getting max dose." The smaller man gave him a questioning look.  
"I'm all for just going to my room. Not like I can get far with guards everywhere." I said.  
They both nodded and I listened the the smaller tap on his pad as we walked down halls.  
When we came to the main hall of G Block, I looked at the people coming out of their rooms to see me.  
The new freak.  
Little did they know how freakish I was.  
xXx **  
**It was a good several hours later that I got a knock on my door.  
I got up to open it and saw the guard from down the hall.  
He held out what looked like a tracking bracelet and a bag of supplies.  
"Standard issue supplies and the bracelet is to keep track of you."  
I reached to take the bag and he put the bracelet on my left wrist.  
"If you try to go anywhere we don't approve of, we will hunt you down and secure you. While we've been given permission for violence, I, as your immediate guard, would rather not use violence if necessary."  
"Guess you're more odd than the rest."  
He nodded. "Rather. Mostly because I consider myself a bit on the disadvantaged side. They give us tools to help restrain you Deadmen, but as a fan of the Carnival I believe you should all be at your best in those games."  
I frowned.  
Carnival?  
"At any rate, if you want to train with your powers, the gym is always available. Crow usually spends a fair amount of time in there, but I wouldn't worry about him. He's rough and violent, but bat your eyes at him, and as pretty as you are, he'll probably just roll over. Some of the other girls get him to at least pause, but most of them are nuts. He's more on the mature women scale. Like myself. Once you talk to him, he's not so bad. In fact, several of the people in here aren't so bad. Some wrong hands from life's deck and maybe a bad choice or two, but nothing serious."  
I waited for him to stop talking.  
He seemed kind of sweet.  
On the taller side, but not much taller than my brother had been. Dark brown hair that was just long enough to get into his face in a cute sort of way. Built like a damn fighter for such a pacifist personality. His green eyes were a bit friendly, but just distant enough to not think he was like this with everyone.  
Allover, he seemed really just kind of nice until you got on his shit list.  
"Huh, guess I got a wrong hand too." I sighed.  
"The two who brought you in said you have a healing Branch of Sin?"  
Is that what they called this curse? It fit. Sorta.  
"Yeah." I deftly took the knife from his hip and cut into my own hand.  
It healed up as he was taking a step back from my quick action.  
I held the knife back out, blade between my fingers.  
He took it as I showed him the perfect healing.  
"Kind of wish I could do that some days." He sighed as he held up his own hand.  
He had it wrapped. "Cut myself cooking last night. Doc is too much of a bitch to do much even for us guards."  
I held out my hands and he seemed apprehensive but gave me his hand.  
I unwrapped the bandage and saw the fresh cut.  
I reached for the knife he was just holstering again and cut open my thumb.  
My blood held the wound open as I forced myself to gather blood on my fingers.  
He flinched as I smeared blood on his hand until he could only gape at the flawless skin of his palm again. My blood absorbed back into me and my own wound healed up.  
He flexed his hand as he pulled away.  
"How did you...am I infected with a Branch too?"  
"No, I can't infect anyone. No one I've ever healed has gotten any abilities. But basically, I use my blood as a catalyst and it changes my typeless blood to yours and activates a rapid healing stored within it. So it's like filling in the missing links between your body with my own blood."  
"Well, that is pretty cool. You could make a fine healer around here." He said. He held out his hand in a handshake. "Izzy Michaels."  
I took his hand.  
"Fenix Lazuli."  
"I'll see you around here." He turned to walk away.  
I watched him round the corner before heading back into my room.  
I sat on my bed and started to go through the bag.  
A change of clothes, basic necessities, and a note.  
I unfolded it and read it.  
Nothing special. A welcome to Deadman Wonderland kind of greeting followed by a 'since you're immune to our typical containment procedures you have to follow special rules' with the rules being listed. Wear the tracker, avoid becoming friends with the guards, don't fight outside of the Carnival.  
Pretty simple.  
Still didn't explain what that was.  
Nor did I get any other instructions on what I was supposed to do here.  
xXx **  
**I waited until after dinnertime to look around at all.  
Given that I didn't have an offensive type 'Branch of Sin' I just kind of figured it might be best to get over with the looking around while people might be sedated by food.  
At least, that had been my hope.  
I managed to make it almost all the way to the gym, using the sound of someone inside lifting weights as a guide.  
I could feel the presence of somebody behind me and turned.  
The man was huge.  
And I'm not talking just tall.  
He must have weighed close to five hundred pounds, and I debated how much was muscle.  
"Food." He said.  
His mouth was partially sewn shut as I noticed the gashes making it bigger.  
What was his ability?  
I found out fairly quickly as he stuffed the metal meal tray in his hands into his mouth.  
He looked down at me like I was next.  
I tried to stand firm, I'd never been eaten before. At least, not alive.  
I'd surely come back from it, if anything of me was left.  
If nothing else, he'd take a bite out of me and drop me to chew on that and I could get away long enough to get help.  
I felt terrified as he reached for me until a blade of blood arched from over my shoulder to stop just before his hand.  
"Go find something else fatso." A deep, almost soothing voice.  
He stood behind me and apparently whatever he looked like, it was enough to make the big guy hesitate and then turn away.  
The blade retracted and I realized it was blood.  
Another Deadman had saved me.  
What had Izzy said? That not everyone was bad in here? Some just had a bad hand in life?  
Was this one of them?  
I realized the sound of weights was gone and turned to keep heading for the gym.  
My savior stood there.  
Taller than me by nearly a foot and quite well muscled.  
His black hair was short and messy, like he never combed it except with his fingers.  
Honestly it was kind of sexy on him.  
His eyes were grayish with hints of green to them.  
Rather nice to me.  
He had a tan and I had to wonder if it was natural.  
And, as I briefly scanned him, whether it was complete coverage.  
Hell, if I had to be locked up in a place with crazy people, no one said I couldn't hook up with one of the crazies.  
"You alright?" He asked.  
I noticed the cut on his arm.  
"Yeah. Thank you."  
He shrugged and turned to head for the gym.  
I followed. "Are you...Crow?" I asked.  
"Looking for a fight?" He walked in and headed for a bench that was already rigged for heavy weights.  
Like the three hundred pounds kind of weights.  
Some serious lifting for not having a spotter.  
"I...no. I don't fight. I can't really fight."  
"Looks like you're in the wrong place then." He laid back to press.  
I watched for a moment, taking in his built body displayed by his lack of a shirt.  
His pants hung lower than I'd expect, but maybe he just knew he was hot and didn't care if he made poor innocent women spontaneously combust.  
He reached for the bar and glanced at me.  
"What do you want?" He asked.  
I felt my cheeks flush slightly at realizing he knew I'd been staring at him.  
"Nothing...I'm just a bit new here and was looking around."  
He moved to sit back up.  
"New? Right. Guess you're not a new guard with that getup. So what are you in for?" He asked.  
I stepped close enough to sit on a nearby bench that had no weights on its bar.  
"Well...they say I killed someone, but I never did. I can't." I said.  
"Ah, another one of the 'I did nothing' crowd." He huffed in disbelief.  
"What about you?" I asked.  
"Murder." He said.  
I sighed inside.  
No, not one of the bad hands.  
"At least, that's what they're pegging on me. I'm not saying I didn't kill, but I'm not calling it murder either. I did what was right. Killing off every single person in that gang was a mercy to the rest of the world."  
I frowned. "Which gang?"  
"A shitty one run by someone who would have ended up in here too." He said.  
I nodded, not really understanding which gang specifically.  
"What did you do before this?" I asked.  
"Well, believe it or not, before all this shit, I was a cop. Not one of the nice ones mind you, but I did what was right for the people I was supposed to protect." He frowned. "You?"  
I looked at the floor. "A nurse of sorts."  
"Of sorts? What's that mean?"  
I glanced at his arm.  
On both thumbs, he had rings with blades.  
I reached for his left arm and cut my thumb on the blade on his hand.  
"Chill out, these are sharp you know." He said.  
I'd never healed someone else with gifts before.  
I brushed my thumb along his cut and he winced before pulling away.  
I forwent recollecting my blood.  
"Trying to poison me?" He asked.  
He brushed away my blood on his pants and I motioned at his arm.  
He looked at me after staring at his arm.  
"Of sorts I guess." He laughed. "And that's all you can do?"  
"Yeah." I nodded. "Heal myself and others."  
"I suppose you won't exactly fare long in this hell. Not with a Carnival coming up."  
I frowned. Did everyone but me know what that was?  
"What is a Carnival?" I asked.  
He gave me a blank look before rubbing his face. "Right, new."  
He got up and I made to follow him as he went to a television on the wall.  
He flicked it on.  
"I normally watch, but I hate him, so I've avoided all his fights. He's a jackass."  
The screen was horrifying.  
A man was using his blood as a weapon to potentially kill another man.  
"Looks like I should have watched. He might actually lose this time. Good. Fucking cheater." He turned as I moved to sit again while covering my mouth hoping not to throw up.  
I'd seen some nasty wounds and such in my time in the community, but nothing like that. That was a fight to the death...for entertainment.  
I looked up at him. "That's a Carnival?" I felt weak and my voice broke.  
"You really aren't going to survive in this place." He frowned as he knelt in front of me.  
I huffed a half assed laugh.  
"Unfortunately, surviving is my specialty." I said.  
"Not if you get killed." He sat on the floor.  
I shook my head. "I've died seven times already and my blood brings me back."  
He leaned back in shock.  
"I've been vivisected to the point of death, chopped up and buried, burned alive when I got pinned by a collapse, shot in the head, decapitated, poisoned, and drowned." I recounted my deaths.  
He looked stunned.  
"So you're...immortal?" He asked.  
"More or less. I might die of old age." I gave a half smile.  
He sighed.  
"Basically, you're the perfect subject for that doctor." He scoffed. "If anyone finds out anyway."  
I hadn't even questioned whether he was trustworthy.  
I guess I figured I'd die in here sometimes anyway.  
He stood up again.  
"Look, you're nice, pretty even," He tinted slightly at that. "I'd hate to see you get killed for nothing in here, even if you might survive. I'll...I'll protect you when you need me to." He said.  
I looked up at him.  
"Since, well, you can't fight anyway. I'll fight for you I guess." He held out his hand to me.  
I took it and he paused as he felt my soft skin.  
"I'm Senji Kiyomasa." He said.  
"Fenix Lazuli."  
He let go of me and went back to the bench he'd been on to undo the weights on it.  
"Do you know anything about fighting?" He asked.  
I shook my head. "Nothing more than watching my brother as a kid."  
"So you have family out there?"  
I shook my head as I watched him put the weights away. "My brother died protecting me in the quake."  
He actually looked sad for a moment.  
"Sorry to hear. I lost my family too. Both of them."  
"Were you married?" I asked.  
He blushed and it was adorable.  
"Hell no. I've never even gotten a real steady relationship." He turned to face me again. "Girls don't exactly come running to me."  
I tilted my head with a smile.  
"Why not? You seem pretty fine to me."  
He flushed slightly again.  
"That's beside the point. You're off topic." He snapped. "Do you want to learn some self defense or not?"  
I stepped forward.  
I nodded as he motioned towards the mat on the other side of the room.  
"I'll expect you to show up every day to work on this until I'm satisfied you can defend yourself." He said.  
I nodded.  
He looked me over.  
"And next time, wear some better clothes for this." He said. "I'm glad you're properly dressed unlike some people in here, but you should get some good workout clothes."  
"I...I don't really know what 'good' would be." I admitted.  
He sighed.  
"Alright, tomorrow morning, meet me here. We'll head down to the shop and see what they have to get."  
I nodded. "Nine?"  
He shrugged.  
I guess Senji was in here anyway.  
He had me kick off my shoes and started to go over some basics in self defense with me.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2  
** I groaned as I took a shower before I went to bed. For not doing anything, I was remarkably tired.  
I was just climbing into bed in my long gown when the sight of the bloodshed from the screen earlier came up.  
I tried to lay down and sleep, but I kept imagining the times I'd died and been hurt and picturing myself in the ring.  
It wasn't enough that I'd had to watch it for that brief time earlier, now I was stuck seeing myself in it now that I was in the dark.  
I pushed myself to try and forget it, but as I was just falling asleep, a vivid image hit me of myself in pieces again because of the whip-like blood blades of that man earlier.  
It shook me and I reached to turn on my light again.  
I felt too shaky to sleep.  
I needed something comforting.  
I had nothing in my room.  
Quite literally. I didn't have anything yet.  
Not even food for a snack.  
I pushed myself up and shoved my feet into my boots.  
There was nothing comforting in this place.  
An image of Senji hit me.  
No, there was someone I'd felt comfortable with.  
I stumbled towards the door, my hand shaking as I tried to open it.  
I'd gotten his room number from him earlier.  
He said I could drop by whenever he was in if I couldn't find him in the gym.  
I held my hand against the wall as I counted rooms.  
This circle of rooms was bigger than I'd thought.  
Maybe because the lights were dimmed?  
I finally found the door with the right number.  
I put my hand against it and tried to fight away the images of being killed in any number of ways by these people.  
I hit the door twice and heard cussing from behind it.  
Loud cussing.  
Had he been asleep?  
I went to turn away as the door opened.  
He stood there looking mussed with his pants hanging low on his hips and unbuttoned. A tiny peek of hair was visible where he hadn't zipped his jeans.  
He looked angry for a moment until he realized it was me.  
"Fenix? What's wrong?" He asked.  
"I...I just can't sleep." I said quietly.  
He looked down at me as he rubbed his neck.  
"Someone scare you on your way back to your room earlier? I'll kick their ass if you want." He offered.  
I couldn't stop shaking as another image of me being burned alive by somehow ignitable blood popped into my head.  
He reached out to steady me.  
"You just scared of this place?" He asked softly.  
I nodded.  
He moved out of his doorway and urged me inside.  
I gripped my sleeves as I stepped inside his room.  
His room was just as big as mine. Or rather, as small.  
His bed was shoved against the wall with the foot at the window and the headboard at the opposite wall.  
There was a small table and two chairs in the corner beside the bathroom door.  
A tall cabinet and fridge were against the wall opposite the door, between the table and chairs and the bed.  
He also had a plush rug on the floor.  
Simple but rather homey.  
He closed his door and I felt a little calmer.  
"I...I keep imagining myself dead in here." I said.  
He moved around me and pulled me close.  
"Shh, you aren't going to die in here. Not if I can help it." He said.  
I leaned my head against his chest, feeling his warmth.  
"Why are you so nice to me?" I asked.  
"I'm not sure. I guess you remind me a bit of when I was a cop." He said.  
"That's not a reason." I mumbled.  
"So I think you're pretty and vulnerable and I just want to wrap you up. Sometimes instincts just make no sense alright."  
He seemed to be holding me closer so I wouldn't see his cheeks flush like before.  
It was a little hot when he did that.  
Kind of made me want to see if he tinted like that in pleasure too.  
I smiled against his skin.  
"I can get that." I said. "It was pretty instant when I saw you too."  
He swallowed and stepped away from me.  
I could see him starting to get a little embarrassed.  
"Look, I'm not entirely sure you're in the right mindset for teasing me. You're scared and I can see that."  
Leave it to him to be the solid thinker.  
A cop and a healer. Great pair we'd make.  
"I know I'm scared of this place. I just...wanted to have something comforting when I try to sleep. This place...it's not normal." I said.  
He sighed and moved to lean against the cabinet.  
"And I'm that sense of comfort to you?"  
I nodded.  
"But more than that. I feel safe with you. Even...before this place, I haven't felt safe for a while. My only friends died a couple years ago and I've been wondering when something like this would happen. My gift isn't always looked at as something amazing you know." I looked down.  
"Because I suppose I was a cop. Most vulnerable people feel safer when they hear the word police." He sighed.  
I shook my head.  
No, cops tended to scare me too, given I believed they would lock me up if they knew what I could do.  
It was just Senji.  
Something about him calmed my fear just by him touching me.  
Hell him opening the door had made me feel a bit safer until that old fear of burning came up at the flash of red from a glimpse of his blanket.  
"It's just you that makes me feel safe." I said.  
He came forward again.  
"Seriously Fenix, I'm not nice. I enjoy violence. This place kind of suits me to be honest."  
I shook my head.  
"You're nice to me, and you don't like needless violence."  
He scoffed. "So your feeling safe if just because I was nice to you?" He stepped forward and grabbed my arm hard. "And if I hurt you right now? Would you still feel safe with me?"  
I leaned against him.  
"You won't hurt me." I said. "Besides, I'd just heal."  
"But would you still feel safe if I did?" He rubbed his hand over my sleeve, feeling my colder skin under the cotton gown.  
See, not violent.  
Even his intentional scare tactic turned to comforting me.  
"Possibly. Though I might just end up confused. How you could be so nice and then mean to me too."  
He sighed.  
"I guess you should just head to bed and think about this thing tomorrow when we work on your training."  
He moved away from me and just the thought of going back out there was terrifying.  
He caught sight of my shaking.  
I tried to control it.  
If he was really sending me back out, then I'd do it.  
Instead he moved to his cabinet and opened it.  
On one of the shelves was a bottle.  
No label, nothing distinguishable about it, just a plain black bottle.  
He turned to face me again.  
"I don't normally show this to people, but I think you might need a sip tonight."  
I frowned as he popped the cap and held it out.  
"Think of it as a kind of sleep medication."  
I could smell the alcohol inside as he set it in my hands.  
It felt heavy.  
"What is it?" I asked.  
"A secret brew from an old friend I have on the outside. He knows I'm in here and he gets a bottle to me when I ask for it. It's one of the few things having privilege gets you. A chance to make a quick phone call out of this madhouse and get something brought in." He said.  
I raised the bottle to bring it closer to my mouth.  
The smell was sickly sweet, but it still couldn't mask the alcohol.  
I braced myself and took a quick drink.  
I gagged as I held the bottle back out to him.  
Senji laughed as he put it away.  
"It'll help you sleep without any dreams. I use it when I can't sleep from the pain after a fight."  
I felt like throwing up, but I held back as he moved closer to me.  
It took a moment to settle again and I looked at him.  
He urged me towards his bed.  
"How can you stand it?" I asked.  
"Easy, don't breathe before drinking it." He said. "It hit me pretty hard the first couple times, but I'm used to the stuff now."  
I stood by the side of the bed as my blood rushed to combat it.  
Even this stuff wouldn't work on me.  
No drugs had since the accident.  
"I don't think it'll work with me."  
He sighed. "Healing blood?"  
I nodded.  
"Well..." He looked to the side for a moment, seeming embarrassed. "You could...try sleeping with me."  
I looked at him.  
He faced me and looked down at me.  
He blushed slightly and glanced away.  
"I mean, you said you feel safe with me, so maybe just having me in the room is good enough." He made to turn away until I reached up to touch his neck above the collar.  
I was nervous, but not because I was afraid.  
More because I'd never been around a man like Senji.  
A couple guys had hit on me before and the older woman had said I was pretty, but given the comparisons around where we lived, I would admit to being a pretty damn good choice for any of the younger men.  
I was one of three young women in the community for elderly survivors.  
None of the guys who had ever spoken to me had peaked my interest quite like Senji.  
I bit my lower lip as he leaned down as I pulled very slightly.  
I put my other hand on his shoulder as he leaned in closer.  
He didn't pull away as I brushed my lips against his.  
"Sorry." I mumbled as I moved away, but he put his arm around me.  
"For what?" He asked. "That weak try?"  
I looked down until he forced me to look up.  
"I hate it when women are immodest, but hell, you're more modest than I've ever seen anyone."  
I closed my eyes in a little bit of shame.  
I didn't mean to be so modest, but I honestly wasn't anything special.  
My gifts were only useful to the injured and myself, I was short and slightly plump compared to the other two girls in my community my age, and I didn't have any skills past getting my GED other than healing people.  
I knew I was useless.  
Senji tilted my head slightly.  
"I actually kind of dig it." He leaned in as I was processing that.  
His mouth met mine and he kissed me much more firmly than I'd tried on him.  
When his tongue touched over my lips I opened to him.  
He wrapped his arms around me and turned my back to the bed.  
I hesitated as I brought my hands up to his chest between us.  
He reached to tangle his right hand in my long hair.  
It was the one thing I liked. My blood allowed me to have long hair.  
Down to my thighs and no other length.  
Maybe because that was how long it was when I got infected with my gifts.  
He pulled my hair to the side as he backed my legs against his bed.  
I stumbled as my knees bent against the edge and he took me down slowly.  
He pulled away slightly and I looked up at him.  
"Honestly, you're too damn perfect for me." He mumbled.  
"What?" I couldn't think straight.  
"Beautiful, sweet, selfless, smart..." He reached to run his thumb over my bottom lip. "Sexy."  
I blushed.  
He was pretty damn suited to me too.  
Strong, kind, thoughtful, streetwise, and yes, sexy to me too.  
His strength showed when he eased up and moved me.  
He held himself over me.  
"You don't mind that I'm small and not so skinny or strong and I'm not very useful?" I rambled.  
He shushed me with a kiss.  
"You're perfect. Bones are not appealing. Give me a woman with curves any day over those skinny broads."  
I blushed again, feeling my blood warm to his words.  
"And if I ever hear you say you aren't useful, I'll spank you."  
I expected him to say he'd hurt me, but the thought of him doing that instead just made me shift a little.  
He made a rumbling laugh.  
"Then again, you might like that." He teased.  
I flushed as he moved to settle between my thighs as his knee nudged my gown up a bit.  
Senji looked down at me.  
"You want to-" He almost looked like he couldn't speak for a moment. "Be with me?"  
"I...I've never been further than just kissing before."  
He sighed. "Somehow that actually makes me feel better." He leaned down to kiss me again. "I'll teach you everything."  
I nodded.  
He had that tint to his cheeks as he reached down to tug my gown up more.  
I let him as I moved my hands to his shoulders.  
He had such warm skin. Marred by tiny scars, healed no doubt by the blood in his veins. He must have healed faster than normal too.  
I don't think he was expecting me to not be wearing anything under my gown.  
He paused as his hand brushed my bare hip.  
"You walked here like this?" He asked.  
I nodded.  
"God I am glad you didn't run into anyone who would try to hurt you." He mumbled.  
He looked at me again.  
"Don't ever wander around here like this again. Not everyone is like me."  
I nodded again.  
I hadn't planned to leave my room again tonight, but then I just needed to see him again for comfort in this scary place.  
Senji pulled my gown back down and then fell to his side beside me.  
"You've been through a lot today." He said.  
I frowned as I turned to look at him.  
"Lets just get some sleep for tonight and I'll work with you all of tomorrow."  
I sighed.  
"Alright." I started to roll over to get up and when I was on my other side, he pulled me against him.  
"You can still stay here." He wrapped his right arm around me as his left tucked under my head where I wasn't quite on the pillow.  
I sighed as he kicked his blanket up and pulled it over us both.  
"Just don't get used to me being nice all the time." He mumbled as he put his arm back over my waist.  
I took hold of his hand and twined my fingers with his, careful of the rings he always seemed to be wearing.  
I snuggled in against his warm body.  
"You are nice Senji. Just not to everyone." I said.  
"Shut up Nix." I stifled a giggle at the nickname.  
I finally felt safe and comfortable enough to drift off to sleep.  
Regardless of the fact that I had never slept in the same bed as a man, least of all one as virile as him.  
Or the fact that both of us were only just acquainted today.  
Something just felt right.  
Like some stupid fairy tale romance.  
xXx  
Senji was horrible.  
He had me on my ass four times in half as many minutes.  
We'd only been training for an hour.  
Most of that was warmup.  
He laughed as I went down again.  
I vented frustration as someone was passing the doorway.  
I lashed out with my foot and caught him behind his ankle and pulled.  
The girl in the doorway seemed shocked as Senji toppled over and landed on top of me.  
"Keep failing like that and I'll think you want to do this." He said.  
I turned my head towards the doorway and he pushed up.  
"What do you want Minatsuki?" He stood up fluidly.  
The girl looked shy for about another second.  
"Just never knew the infamous Crow was playful is all. Heard you and wanted to see what the fuss was." The sweet looking girl was actually a bit of a bitch.  
Senji held out his hand to me and I used his arm to get back up.  
"So the killer can actually teach too?"  
"More like I'd rather not end up with a total bloodbath whenever she goes in. You know us old cards don't play nice with fresh meat."  
She huffed at his words.  
He sounded almost mean.  
Cards? Bloodbath?  
Right, the Carnival.  
"So what is Hummingbird doing here at the gym, surely your traits don't need worked on, considering your ability."  
The girl tossed her hair.  
"Of course not. I just got asked by the guards to send you a message." She looked thoughtful. "The guards said your next fight is tonight, and Izzy wanted me to tell you to go easy."  
"Who's my match?" He frowned.  
Minatsuki shrugged.  
"Not sure. Should come out about lunch though."  
Senji looked at the clock.  
"Fine. Go away so I can finish then."  
"Well, just go easy on the poor girl. She looks pretty weak."  
Senji grumbled as she left. "I'm fixing that."  
I watched him look at me.  
"Izzy worries too much. He doesn't care for all this useless violence." He said.  
"He did seem pretty nice for a guard."  
"Maybe because you're a woman. He is softer with females, but definitely for women like you." Senji came closer and helped me position myself properly.  
He moved around me and swung his arm slowly as if he was hitting me.  
We worked on blocking for another half hour before the screen flipped on automatically.  
I jolted and Senji turned to face it.  
"The announcement you've waited for! Tonights' match has been decided."  
I looked at the screen hesitantly.  
A name flash across the screen.  
"An old favorite, Crow!" Senji grinned.  
Did he really enjoy the fighting?  
"And a new challenger, Phoenix."  
Why did I have a feeling that was me?  
His grin fell as he realized it too.  
Fenix, Phoenix.  
A mythical bird that revives and heals itself.  
xXx  
I sat on the bed in his room.  
Senji had given up training after the announcement.  
He sat at the table holding his head.  
"Damn. Did you know about this yesterday?" He snapped.  
I balled up.  
"Of course I didn't."  
My entire body shook.  
They expected me to fight him?  
I couldn't fight a paper bag.  
I just couldn't fight period.  
Senji moved from the table to sit on his bed.  
He pulled me close.  
"I'm sorry. I know you didn't know. It just seems so prearranged." He said. "Hell, they probably told the boss of your power and I have a bad habit of critically injuring my opponents. It probably seemed like a good matchup. But they have no idea you can't fight."  
I leaned into him.  
"What do I do Senji?"  
He sighed.  
"I'll forfeit and go through the penalty."  
"Penalty?" I frowned.  
"A roulette game where the sick doc gets to tear off bits and pieces of the loser." He shrugged. "I'm willing to let my first loss be to a pretty woman."  
I shook my head.  
"No, if either of us should lose, it should be me. I'm the coward." He went to speak but I shushed him with a quick kiss. "Besides, no matter what she tears off me, I'll regenerate it."  
He looked thoughtful.  
"No." He shook his head.  
"Yes." I moved to get up. "You will fight me like normal. I'll just keep healing anyway."  
"I can't hurt you, you're too..." He looked away.  
"Weak? I know. But give them their show, let me lose. It'll be fine Senji. The doctor can't take anything from me that I won't grow back with my ability."  
He ran his hands through his hair as he put his feet on the ground.  
I stepped between his thighs and leaned to kiss him like he had me last night.  
"You swear you'll be alright?" He asked.  
"Absolutely. I'll even try to fight you if that makes a difference. That way they don't think it was a front."  
"Try is like it. You couldn't beat me if you spent a year training with me."  
I looked in his gray eyes, knowing he could see every speck of purple in my blue.  
"You promise?"  
"To what?"  
"A year."  
He pulled back.  
"Damn, at least ask me out first."  
His smile was contagious.  
"Then..."  
He put his finger over my lips.  
"Will you go to dinner with me tonight Fenix?"  
I nipped his finger and nodded.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**  
I stepped out of the cage to face Senji in his leather coat and jeans.  
His cut body was amazing in that jacket.  
We'd even found me a decent dress for tonight. And a cheap shirt and pants for my fight with him.  
His sleeves were already rolled up and he flicked his rings to unlock the blades.  
I ignored the announcer as I watch Senji psych the viewers by cutting both his arms.  
The blades that grew from his blood were beautiful.  
Deep red scythes that curved nicely.  
Our plan was for me to try and get in closer to him, with him fending me off. If I managed to get close, I could cut my hands on his blades and heal the cuts they came from.  
But that was iffy.  
Basically, he was just going to keep making small nicks on me that I would heal and eventually the repeated use would make me pass out.  
It didn't really, but as he'd said before, every known ability had a limit.  
The crowd expected it, so it would happen.  
When the bell rung, I watched him step forward.  
I braced as if he were going to swing at me, but he didn't.  
Suddenly, before I could react, his left arm moved and I felt a burning at my right thigh.  
My blood healed the cut quickly.  
"And Crow starts the fight."  
I looked at Senji.  
Anyone who really looked in his eyes could see this hurt him.  
I stepped forward and took another cut on the outside of my calf.  
He was only hitting non-vital locations.  
The usual for him.  
He gave me his usual rundown after I convinced him that I needed to make this realistic.  
I couldn't really get close to him though.  
He kept himself guarded pretty well.  
My healing blood kept me from losing any, but he had been right, the rapid use was going to put me down eventually.  
But not from exhaustion. The burning for my blood as it healed me was almost torture.  
"It looks like Phoenix can't get close enough to get in a hit of any kind."  
I felt the gash on my left leg a little deeper than he had intended.  
I winced and he barely grazed me on the right.  
My left leg gave out as he swung for my arm.  
The tip of his scythe missed my arm and shoulder, to go right through my neck.  
Not severing my spine, but he cut through my windpipe and every artery possible.  
I dropped to the floor.  
Another death for me.  
He drew his blades back in as he stumbled forward.  
My eyes probably looked a little glassy to him.  
Even I could feel it as the blood pooled around my neck while it was still registering the death.  
I gave it a moment before it started pulling back, but Senji blew our cover.  
He dropped to his knees beside me and reached to brush my hair out of my face.  
"Can the Phoenix bring itself back from death? Looks like Crow met his match. This is the first time he's ever killed a woman."  
Senji flipped them off as my blood came back into me under the cover of his body.  
"Fenix? Baby, can you heal this?" He put his hand against my cheek.  
"Did we find another couple of lovers here in the Carnival Corpse Games?"  
Senji felt my body run colder for a moment as my blood gathered the required healing properties and mended the external wound.  
Always external before internal.  
He started to pick me up and shuffled his hold on me enough to put my cheek against his bare shoulder.  
The warmth sunk into me as my blood healed me enough to breathe again.  
I gasped for air and gripped his jacket.  
When the first lungful brought blood with it, I coughed. I covered my mouth as he knelt to get me a more comfortable position.  
"And Phoenix is back everyone, living up to her name. Death holds no chains on this little bird."  
Senji used his free hand to flip them off again.  
"Screw all of you. She's just a woman with no fighting to her." He snapped.  
I coughed up blood into my hands and it sank back into my skin.  
I tried to stop, knowing it might tear sensitive tissue in my neck.  
I focused on shallow breaths.  
Senji put his right hand on my cheek as his left arm kept me supported.  
"You okay baby?" He asked quietly.  
I made a tiny nod and gripped his jacket lapel tighter.  
I tried to take another deeper breath, this time not choking on my own blood.  
My neck burned from the healing.  
As I was satisfied I would be able to breathe again, I looked up at him.  
"I'm alright. Told you I'd come back no matter what."  
He sighed as he leaned in to kiss me, obviously not caring about the viewers.  
"We are at a loss on how to judge this. Who is our winner? The insurmountable Phoenix cannot even die, but Crow can't be touched without an offensive Branch of Sin."  
I pushed away from his soft lips.  
"I secede." I said.  
"What's this? Little Phoenix gives in? Whatever for?"  
"I'll never win." I said.  
Senji stood up behind me.  
The cage doors opened.  
"We shall announce Crow as our winner. And now, the Penalty game."  
I started to go towards the medical table to one side.  
Senji grabbed my wrist.  
"Isn't dying enough for these bastards?" He asked.  
I gave him a half smile.  
"It isn't for them. It's for you. I'll never see you lose."  
I pulled away from him.  
"We will be talking about this at dinner." He snapped as he followed me.  
The doctor looked unsure.  
"How do I feel happy knowing you'll just regenerate?" She frowned. She glanced at Senji. "Unless..."  
"No." I said firmly, even though the bitch scared me to death. "I'm the loser in this fight. Our friendship has nothing to do with it."  
I moved to sit on the table.  
"The restraints." She snapped her fingers at the two guards.  
Senji stepped forward.  
"Just take what you want." I said.  
I knew it would hurt.  
I saw nothing but medical tools. Not that morphine or any kind of painkiller worked on me.  
The doctor frowned, but went to spin the wheel anyway.  
Senji moved to stand beside me.  
He reached to hold my hand.  
I wasn't sure who was more afraid, him or I.  
The wheel slowly came around to a stop on right hand.  
She came back with a slightly happy expression.  
She was getting a large chunk of me.  
I didn't want to feel the torture she was bound to inflict.  
I laid my hand on the table and squeezed Senji's hand.  
"Do it quick." I said quietly.  
The doctor was pondering over which tool to use.  
Senji cut his hand on the corner of the table and created a flat edged blade from his palm.  
Before the doctor could stop either of us, he slammed his hand down over my right wrist.  
I pulled my arm away as my blood tried to heal his cut and pull my hand back together quickly.  
I held the stump of my hand as it burned.  
Through bone and everything.  
I got down from the table and Senji put his arm around me to lead me away.  
"No fucking way. That is my job dammit." She screeched.  
"You took too long bitch." Senji retorted. "We've got plans for tonight already."  
I wanted to smile at his familiarity of me already.  
Two short days and it was like love at first sight for me.  
He really was perfect.  
xXx  
I let out a string of cussing as soon as the doors to the cage room closed.  
Izzy was there waiting.  
He looked at my arm.  
"Ah, so you did lose." He sighed.  
"No, I quit. I can't beat Senji and I can't die to forfeit." I said as my hand was already beginning to reform.  
The bone was coming along quite quickly and was almost complete in just the short time since Senji cut it off.  
My skin was beginning to cover the bone again as filaments of muscle and nerves and veins filled in under it.  
Senji started to lead me away and I let him guide me.  
The pain of the burn was far too strong for me to think.  
I could hear them talking as we walked.  
The door to our Block opened and Izzy left us at the door.  
Senji brought me down a floor to the cafeteria and shop.  
He sat me at a table by the door and I watched him head for the man over the counter to the right.  
I looked up as a flash of pale color sat across from me.  
"Well, I did warn him to go easy on you." Minatsuki said.  
"I'm fine." I held up my half healed hand.  
"So you do regen. Anything?"  
I nodded.  
"And can't die as far as I know." I said.  
"Huh, that's cool I guess." She shrugged.  
I willed my blood to heal me faster.  
It seemed to work, but the burn increased.  
I looked up again as Senji glared at Minatsuki.  
"Vacate." He snapped.  
"Just seeing how bad she was." The girl said as she got up.  
Senji pulled the chair around the small table to sit by me.  
"How is it?" He asked.  
I held up my nearly healed hand.  
He made a low whistle and took it gently in his.  
"Holy shit. This is amazing." He said. He looked up at me from where he was facing down at my hand. "But it hurts like a bitch doesn't it?" He asked.  
I shrugged.  
"Be honest Nix, I saw every time I nicked you. You kept wincing. It hurts you to heal yourself doesn't it?" He asked.  
I reached for his arm and he let me grab the muscled flesh of his forearm.  
I dug my nails in and he very nearly jumped with a yelp.  
"Just about like that, all the time. But a burning feeling with it." I said.  
He shook his arm and looked at my marks.  
I hadn't drawn blood, but close.  
He started to pull me closer to him to hold me.  
"Fuck I'm so sorry." He said. "If you had just told me, I would have held back more."  
"I'm fine Senji." I said.  
My hand slowly stopped hurting as the tissue settled completely.  
"No, you're not. I won't let you fight again."  
"You can't do that." I shook my head.  
"Watch me." He snapped.  
I pushed away.  
"No Senji, I just...need to learn how to fight. That's it. If I can fight, I can win against others. I mean, I can break bones right? That's allowed."  
He sighed.  
"I just...don't want you to get hurt anymore. Not even by me."  
I relaxed against him.  
"I'll think of something. At least they can't put me in another fight so soon. Or you. We do need to recover our strength."  
"True enough." He sighed again.  
We sat for a few minutes until he got up again.  
He walked back to the man at the counter and I watched his collar get scanned as he picked up a tray.  
He came back to me and motioned for me to follow.  
We walked in silence up to his room.  
He set the tray down on the table.  
"Give me a minute. I'm going to grab your stuff from your room real quick. Cat's out of the bag with my stupid actions, might as well make sure you stay safe."  
He locked his room door behind him.  
I looked at my fully healed hand as my old skin tone finally came back.  
I glanced around the room real quick.  
"What do you think Loki? Would you have liked Senji? I hope so. He's real sweet to me." I spoke out loud. It was the best I could do since I couldn't visit his grave. "I think I really like him. Even though we've only known each other a couple days. But he's great Lo. Former cop, caring personality towards who he cares for, protective, and he would be a good husband."  
I held my head in my hands.  
Loki had never liked the thought of me dating.  
I couldn't blame him. I'd been just barely in my teens when he died.  
But he made me promise to never choose a man he didn't approve of.  
I wish he were alive to approve of Senji.  
The door opened and I looked up at that familiar tan chest and messy hair and soft smile.  
He carried my bag.  
"This is really everything?" He asked.  
I nodded.  
He held it out and I took it.  
I pulled out the dress we had gotten for me.  
I moved towards the bathroom and he set my bag inside his cabinet.  
I went in and shed the torn clothing I'd been wearing.  
All those tiny cuts.  
He had been so careful to not nick an artery or anything severe.  
Just small cuts on my arms and legs.  
They had healed back to perfect flesh again.  
I pulled on the silky lingerie I had gotten while he wasn't looking.  
It settled softly against my skin and I was so tempted to just wear this out.  
He'd probably turn a vibrant red and get so flustered he couldn't speak.  
But I also wanted to wear the long dark green gown.  
He said it had complimented the red tints in my black hair.  
I think he just liked it.  
It did flow extremely well on me.  
The mass of fabric in the skirt didn't weigh me down like I had thought when I had seen it and the bodice accented my just below average bosom. Even the ankle boots fit nicely with it.  
I reached for the handle of the bathroom, taking a deep breath.  
It was hard to think that a normal person wouldn't be eating with a man who nearly killed them. Even if they did survive.  
I was a special case.  
Plus, Senji hadn't been trying to kill me.  
Entirely the opposite in fact.  
I twisted the handle and stepped out.  
He had quickly changed to a clean pair of pants and a shirt, but his leather jacket hung on the back of the chair he sat in.  
He stood up to look at me.  
"Wow, that looks so much better on you." He said.  
I blushed slightly.  
"You look pretty good yourself."  
He rubbed the back of his neck and moved to pull out my chair for me.  
We couldn't have a fancy restaurant dinner like a normal couple, but he was making it pretty special anyway.  
I sat down and he leaned down to kiss the side of my neck.  
"You really do look beautiful Fenix." He said.  
He moved to sit down and pulled the covering off the tray.  
I was actually kind of impressed.  
I hadn't been expecting it, but the steak was a treat I'd wanted for years. I could never have afforded a steak like this.  
Juicy and tender just by the look of it.  
Plus vegetables we couldn't even get this time of year, freshly seasoned and sautéed.  
As well as a delicate soup that was thicker than broth, but not like a chowder. It reminded me of tomato soup from when I was a kid, but it was golden.  
"Do you...like it?" He asked.  
I noticed another covered dish and went to open it.  
"Not yet. That is desert." He said.  
"This is...fantastic Senji. More than I'd hoped for." I said.  
He looked happy I approved.  
"I used to cook stuff like this back when I was a cop."  
"What? You didn't live off take out and ramen?" I teased.  
He scoffed as he started cutting into his steak.  
"I may have been a lonely bachelor, but I've never let that stop me from taking care of myself." He said.  
I smiled as I ate a softly sautéed carrot. It was just firm enough, but tender. Perfection.  
I looked at my meal.  
"Honestly Senji..." I started. He looked at me. "I...haven't eaten so well in the past years since my brother died. The first time I had good meals since the quake...was with you."  
He reached out and took my hand.  
"As long as you stick with me, I'll make sure you eat good every day." He said.  
I nodded.  
I gave him a teasing smile.  
"Is that a proposal?" I asked.  
He blushed and pulled his hand away.  
It took a moment of my loving how he colored for him to look at me again.  
"Maybe." He mumbled.  
I sighed as I took a bite of the steak.  
I looked at him.  
"I would, but I'm not sure we can here. I know it's been a short time, but..." I dropped off.  
"Yeah. It's just like getting shot in the heart, seeing you that first time. Even from behind. When I thought Itadaki was going to attack you, I had to jump in. But then you turned around and I was actually a little floored. Even decked out in the issued jumpsuit, you were adorable and sexy and modest about yourself." He said. "It was like someone had dropped an angel into my lap on accident. And then you showed up at night and I was sure you were the one. I mean, I was a cop, but no woman ever came to me for comfort. That was always the others on my crew."  
I nodded.  
"I kind of thought you were like my hero that day. I honestly thought he was going to eat me. And then you came from nowhere and I was safe again. It was the first time in my life since my brother died that someone saved me. Normally, everyone in the community knows my gift, so no one bothers to save me." I said. "But there you were, not caring that I could be dangerous, you just saved me anyway and even started teaching me how to fight back."  
"And I'll keep teaching you. I...I'm not kidding when I say I'm already kind of in love with you. You're funny, smart, and you don't shy away from my curse."  
"And you don't abuse mine, so I'd say that you're the first to really see me too."  
He huffed a laugh.  
"Hell, you're making me mushy dammit."  
His words sounded angry, but his cheeks said he was just embarrassed.  
I reached across the table to touch his hand.  
"It's alright if you kind of love me Senji." I said. He looked at me as I blushed. "I kind of love you too."  
He took my hand in his. The same one he had chopped off earlier.  
"Well at least it isn't just me." He said.  
xXx  
We finished our meal and he stood up.  
I looked at him.  
We had seemed to get over our childlike embarrassment of talking about our quick fall for each other.  
He looked down at me.  
"Want to...take a shower with me?" He asked.  
He had taken a shower before bed last night too.  
But he hadn't invited me then.  
I nodded.  
Finally having the chance to see the rest of him.  
I was not going to pass this up.  
A lot of the women I know would have said he was too brawny to really be attractive, but I disagree.  
I like his muscle. He worked out quite often, evident by his familiarity with the gym and Izzy had said he normally hung out there.  
I really wanted to see the rest of that body.  
But would he want to see me?  
He started to head for the door to the bathroom and I got up.  
I hesitated at the doorway as he pulled off his shirt.  
"Maybe...going too fast?" He asked.  
It was hard to imagine such a powerful, outgoing, and rough demeanor also having a shy side.  
But he seemed honestly unsure when he looked at me.  
"No, well, yes, but not under the circumstances. It's just...I want to see you, but I'm not much to look at myself."  
He reached out to pull me into the bathroom.  
"Well, I want to see you too." He said.  
"Don't you normally get annoyed at women showing skin?" I asked.  
"With any other woman, but you're special. I know you aren't going to flaunt yourself." He said.  
He reached for the button on his jeans as I started to pull the dress up.  
This was the first time I'd ever undressed in front of a man before.  
I pulled the dress over my head and looked to see him staring at me.  
His cheeks were tinted, but he didn't seem embarrassed.  
I looked at the floor, my eyes passing over the waist of his jeans.  
The slight bulge was evident.  
If nothing else, he liked the lingerie.  
"When did you get that?" He asked, his voice going rougher for a moment.  
"When you weren't paying attention."  
He made a low, sexy laugh.  
"Guess I'll have to keep a close eye on you then."  
I smiled.  
"Not that I'll mind that much."  
He reached out and brushed his fingers over the lace hem of my top.  
"Why are you so unsure of yourself?" He asked. "You're so fucking sexy it's scary."  
I looked up at him.  
He leaned down and kissed me.  
"God those eyes are killer." He mumbled against my lips.  
I closed my eyes as he pulled me closer to kiss me deeper.  
I put my hands over his shoulders and threaded my fingers in his hair.  
He pulled away, but didn't let go of me.  
"You'll be putting that back on, but I do need a shower. Hell, maybe a cold one." He said.  
I shivered as he trailed his fingers over my hip as he turned to get the shower going.  
He ran his hand through his hair as I shrugged the lace camisole off and slipped off the matching panties.  
"Senji..." He reached for the zipper on his jeans as I stepped under the warm water.  
"What?" He asked.  
I kept my back to him, feeling up the courage to speak again.  
"If...we ever get out of here...would you stay with me?"  
He was quiet enough that I had thought he had decided to stop this whole night.  
Then I felt his heat behind me as he pulled me back against him.  
"You'd want me that long?" He sounded amazed.  
Was it really as hard for him as it seemed for me to believe someone could want us?  
Had our gifts really deluded us that much?  
I turned around in his arms.  
"I just know being with you feels way too right to be wrong." I said.  
He groaned as he leaned down to kiss me again.  
"I was thinking the same thing earlier." He said.  
He reached to pick me up so that I was slightly taller than him.  
I braced my forearms on his shoulders to steady myself.  
"Fenix, will you marry me?" He asked.  
I blinked down at him.  
"I mean, later, when we ever do get out of this hell?"  
I couldn't stop the tears from forming.  
God we had such a weird relationship.  
I leaned down to kiss him again.  
"Yes. I don't care if we get married in here Senji, as long as it's real."  
He grinned.  
Such a sexy sight.  
"I'll get you a damn ring later." He mumbled as he leaned his head down.  
He licked over my collar bone.  
"First I really need you. Cold water can't kill this for me now." He said.  
I laughed as he made me part my thighs around his hips.  
The tip of him barely brushed me and I shivered.  
I wrapped my left arm over his shoulder and tangled my right hand in his damp hair.  
"Are you..." He started.  
I nodded. "Is that wrong?" For my age it was unusual at the least.  
He sighed.  
"No. All the better, I just don't want to hurt you any more." He said. He looked at my face again. "Will you heal even if I do this?" He asked.  
I frowned. "What?"  
He tinted a darker shade of red that was more than just arousal.  
"When I stretch you, will your body just heal itself and make it hurt every time?" He asked bluntly.  
I shrugged. "I've never done it before. I mean, I've been offered sex, but I didn't want my first time with someone who didn't care."  
What kind of man would even think to ask such a thing?  
Senji. He cared that my gift hurt me. He cared enough to question, and I suspect if it does end up hurting me, he'd stop instantly.  
"I'm glad then." He said.  
"Why?" I frowned.  
"Because I do care. And I get to keep you to myself. For life." He grinned as he positioned himself.  
I felt him enter me slowly, stretching me almost painfully.  
When he pushed me down onto him, I gripped his shoulder and my fingers almost tightened in his hair.  
It hurt almost as much as I had been anticipating.  
He kissed my cheek and I realized I had closed my eyes and tears were falling down my face.  
"God I'm sorry. Do you want me to stop?" He asked.  
If it hurt every time like this, maybe.  
I shook my head.  
He eased back out almost completely, then slowly thrust back in.  
Neither the retreat or reentry hurt nearly as much.  
And there was a very faint burning feeling as my body adjusted to his.  
My blood was warring with whether to let this change go or fix it.  
He moved slightly faster as my back hit the wall.  
"Baby?" He looked at me.  
I met those grayish eyes and saw the worry.  
"I'm fine."  
My body had settled on making room for him.  
I was glad of that.  
I didn't want this to hurt every time.  
Because like hell I was going to constantly deny him.  
My parents marriage went to shit because of that and my adult brother ended up taking custody of me when I was ten.  
He kissed me as he gripped my hips tighter.  
I started to lose track of my thinking as he was drawing out a feeling I'd never felt before.  
It wasn't the tightness in my stomach of nervousness, but it was close.  
Just a little lower.  
Like he was stroking nerves that I'd never been able to feel with my gifts.  
He probably was.  
I shuddered as his thumb trailed over my thigh, his fingers wrapping around my skin.  
His hand between us looked so tan compared to my paleness.  
Hell, he was entirely tanned and it looked great on him.  
Natural.  
His thumb brushed over the tiny nub above where we were joined and my head fell back at the shock.  
It felt so good.  
But almost a little sinful too.  
He was touching me in ways I'd never even touched myself.  
I felt that tightness in me just snap and I clenched on him.  
My vision flickered as I stared down at him with a hazy focus.  
"Fenix?" He groaned.  
"Hmm?" I couldn't think straight.  
"You alright?"  
Seriously, this man was perfect.  
Who asked a self healer if they were alright?  
Who really cared about whether someone who could automatically heal from any trauma actually felt alright?  
I nodded.  
"So good." I mumbled.  
"Good, because seeing that was so fucking sexy." He rumbled. "Do you mind if I..." He looked unsure again.  
I paused my mental process. He was asking me if he could come?  
No, he was asking if he could inside me.  
I almost started to nod when I realized we hadn't used any protection.  
Could we even get any in here?  
"Baby?" He sounded rougher than usual.  
While that roughness to his voice was sexy, he was probably on his edge.  
I nodded.  
It wasn't as if I'd get pregnant at this point in my cycle.  
Would my body even accept it?  
He groaned as he shoved me down on him harder than before and growled my name.  
It was enough to set off still raw nerves and I orgasmed again.  
"Senji." I whispered his name, wanting to scream but my voice wouldn't come to me.  
I could feel it as he spilled into me.  
He slowly eased away from me and let my weak legs take small measures of my weight.  
He looked down at me once I was standing against the wall of the shower.  
"God that was hot." He said.  
I couldn't help a laugh.  
He frowned.  
"Sorry, I just...wasn't expecting that."  
"Right, most women expect at least a little class afterward." He started to look away.  
I pulled him down to kiss him.  
"I don't expect you to be someone you aren't. And you do have class Senji. But...I like your crass too."  
He made a half smile.  
"Good, because I'll fully admit that sex with you just topped my list. Hell, I can't even remember feeling so good afterward before."  
"You've done it often before?" I asked.  
He turned away and reached for a washcloth.  
"A bit. Does that bother you?" He asked.  
I shook my head. "Just...only be with me from now on."  
He laughed. "Of course. One woman like you is more than what I'd ever deserve. Not a chance in hell I'd risk losing you." He said.  
He held out the soaked cloth to me.  
"May I?" He asked.  
"You...want to?" I frowned.  
"I want to spend the rest of our lives taking care of you. If you'll let me. Guess it's just my nature."  
I smiled as I nodded. "Well, you were a cop for a reason right?"  
He scoffed. "That's a long story. I'll tell you over dinner tomorrow, but promise not to laugh."  
"I promise." I said as he started to wash me.  
It was a night of firsts for me, because no one had washed me since I was little.  
He spent his time learning every inch of my body.  
I wanted to reciprocate, but when he finished with me, he did himself quite quickly.  
Watching him was something else though too.  
Seeing every inch of him was worth it.  
Senji was really lean and muscled. It was amazing.  
Unlike my slightly curved self. I didn't weigh more than I should, but I had less muscle and more squish to my body.  
All hundred and ten pounds of me was not at all strong.  
He shut off the water and reached for a towel.  
I let him dry me as thoroughly as he had washed me.  
I reached for my lingerie as he quickly dried himself.  
"Thank you." I said softly.  
"I wanted to do that. It just felt right." He pulled his jeans back on. Commando.  
He didn't bother with a zipper this time.  
I felt his heat as he came up behind me again at the door.  
"That color blue is beautiful on you." He said.  
"I just liked it." I said.  
He opened the door and I stepped out almost nervously.  
Normally I wore my gown to bed.  
"I'm not going to lie Nix, I really don't think I'll ever get enough of you."  
I turned to face him, seeing the head of his cock peeking from his jeans.  
I blushed.  
He didn't seem embarrassed about being so open with me anymore.  
"You are way too sexy. All day when we were practicing yesterday, I had to constantly fight the urge to pin you to the floor and take advantage of you there."  
I blinked at him.  
I hadn't even noticed.  
"I still won't do it, just because of the risk of someone walking in on us, but someday, if we get out of here and get a house with a gym, I will be doing it."  
I shivered.  
A fantasy was a good thing to have.  
Now I didn't have to feel so bad whenever I came up with one of my own.  
"Alright." I managed to get my voice to work.  
Just the imagery behind his words was erotic to me.  
He came closer and urged me to the bed.  
I laid down and he covered me completely.  
"Don't worry, I'll never be rough with you." He said.  
He looked in my eyes again and I was pinned by that honest gaze.  
"I will never hurt you again." He said.  
I knew he could never really promise that.  
What if they put us up against each other again? Surely there was a limit to the matches they could make?  
He leaned down to kiss me.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**  
I felt exhausted when I shot upright in bed.  
It was almost eight when I looked at the clock on the window sill.  
My body shivered and I sat up.  
That nightmare had been so vivid.  
I could feel myself shaking from it.  
I almost jumped at the warm hand on my hip as Senji reached for me.  
He kept me up until almost two between the talking and the sex.  
He was insatiable. And with a stamina that would make the gods jealous.  
"Baby?" He spoke softly.  
I couldn't get the words out.  
He leaned on his side and reached for the low light attached to the wall.  
It came on dim enough for him to see me.  
I tried to turn away so he wouldn't see the tears running down my face.  
That didn't work as he sat up and pulled me close.  
"What's wrong Fenix?"  
"Just a nightmare Senji, it's nothing."  
He huffed. "A regular nightmare doesn't normally have you crying and shaking like this." He leaned a little to kiss my cheek. "Tell me."  
I took a deep breath and gripped his arm as it wrapped around me to pull me into his naked lap.  
Skin to skin might have once scared me, but with him it just felt natural now.  
"It was just a dream of us having a life outside here, a good dream, then somehow we started fighting and it turned into the fight last night except this time I didn't come back and that crazy doctor ended up cutting you up. Alive. I just..." I buried my face against his shoulder.  
"Shh. It's alright. That will never happen. I'll die before I let her cut me up alive. If I ever get the chance, I'll kill her for what she's done to us all."  
I pulled away and nodded.  
"I know you would fight first, but I just couldn't stop it."  
"I get it, believe me. It's the fear of being useless. But you aren't useless Nix. To me or yourself. I need you to stay with me." He said.  
I nodded again.  
He sighed as he shifted me away and stood up to go to his cabinet.  
I watched him pull out a piece of candy from a box.  
I frowned and he must have caught it.  
"It's the antidote to the poison they keep in these collars." He said.  
I nodded.  
"That didn't work on me. I got the full injection when I took it off and handed it back and my blood just shoved it back out."  
He huffed a laugh. "Wish mine would just cut through this fucking thing. It's more annoying than I'd ever thought my tags and tie were. Never would have thought I'd miss my uniform choking me so much."  
I laughed.  
I still couldn't picture him in the uniform I'd seen cops wearing outside.  
I had to wonder if I couldn't get my blood to think the poison in his veins was something to heal and help him too.  
Senji pulled out some clean clothes and turned for the bathroom.  
"I think for today, we'll go shopping to get you some real clothes. They normally only let winners into the lower levels, but I think I can get them to let you in too."  
I nodded as he opened the door.  
He turned to look at me.  
When he motioned for me to join him I stood up.  
I picked up the dress from the floor and the lingerie.  
He set his stuff on the counter as I closed the door.  
xXx  
I couldn't believe they had let me in so easily.  
But the guards at the doors to the elevator for the shops just stepped aside for Senji.  
They didn't even try to stop me from being at his side.  
Apparently the reputation of Crow was something to be feared.  
I suppose being the lover of such a man gave me an advantage.  
I never had to fear him.  
I knew how strong he was and the way his eyes lit up when he talked about both his fights and his old life told me a lot.  
It wasn't that he liked the bloodlust and violence. He just knew a lot of these people were killers. There were quite a few Deadmen in here who deserved their sentences.  
Minatsuki included.  
I was a little horrified to hear her story.  
In a way it had been self defense, but the level of mutilation had been over abundant enough that she was considered a murderer.  
Senji led me past a couple small shops to a high end clothing store.  
It was way more than I could afford.  
"Well, well, if it isn't Crow. Long time no see. Obviously that jacket has held up nicely my dear." An older woman spoke from the back of the shop.  
"Your work still astounds me Larissa." He said.  
"And such a pretty young thing on your arm now. I feel almost proud of you."  
I looked at the woman. She reminded me of the old lady who helped me bury my brother and take care of me.  
She had a kind look to her slightly wrinkled face, but her eyes said she was sharper than she looked.  
Her build was slight, like she had lost weight recently. But her hands still showed signs of using a needle and scissors.  
"Little Phoenix, the unique one in here. You know, no one else so far found by this hell has ever been able to heal like you." She said.  
I held on to Senji's hand tighter.  
"Fenix, this is Larissa, also known as Thresher. She's one of the few in here not named for a bird of some sort."  
I looked at her again.  
She was a Deadman?  
"I haven't gone by that since Calvin was killed by that bitch Rei."  
I frowned.  
"The doctor, Takashima." Senji explained. "Most of us older inmates just call her by her first name. Not like she deserves respect."  
I nodded.  
"So, what can I do for you today Sen?" Larissa asked him.  
"I need some clothes for her. Got anything in mind that will suit her?" He urged me forward.  
I held back a flinch as she reached out to turn me around as she stood up.  
"Curvy yet trim, short, longer than squared limbs, long hair." She mumbled as she looked me over.  
Senji met my eyes and as she was done I moved back to him.  
"Bit of a scaredy cat isn't she?"  
"Fenix isn't a fighter, she's more of a healer." Senji said. "Any one of us could easily hurt her with our Branches."  
She huffed. "She should go talk to Karako then. That girl was a nurse, but she fights with the big boys."  
"I won't be talking to anyone in that group." Senji scowled.  
"I'm just saying, the girl could help alleviate some of her fears, maybe teach her some tricks to being unarmed as it were."  
I frowned.  
"She's like me?" I asked.  
"Her blood becomes a barrier between her and anything else, so kind of." Larissa said.  
"Do you have some stuff for her?" Senji asked.  
The older woman nodded at him.  
"Give me a minute to gather some stuff for temporary and I'll get some measurements to make her up some real clothes."  
"And a jacket too." Senji said as she started to walk around her shelves.  
I finally looked around the shop.  
Everything was handmade.  
"Larissa used to be a fashion designer before the quake, and after she and her husband were brought in here, she started making up quality clothes for us Deadmen." Senji said.  
I nodded.  
"When Calvin was killed, she stopped being selected for the fights because her Branch doesn't work so well anymore."  
She came back to us with a few things.  
"These should be quite good on her. I had initially made them for that brat Minatsuki, but she said they were 'too proper' for her. What would that little brat know of proper?" Larissa huffed as she pulled open a drawer after dropping the clothes in his hands. She motioned to me. "Come on."  
I glanced at Senji as she started to head to the back.  
He nodded and set the stuff on the counter to follow behind me.  
"Really boy?"  
"Just be patient with her Larissa, she's not like the rest of us."  
"Damn straight, she's actually shy for one." The woman motioned for me to stand on a short block as Senji closed the door.  
He leaned against it as the woman pulled out a tape measure.  
"So what is your Branch of Sin?" Larissa asked me.  
"Well...my gift doesn't have a name."  
She laughed. "Gift! You are delusional. These things are curses."  
I looked for something to cut myself with and Senji held up his arm, he cut his wrist and a tiny scythe came from his skin.  
I cut into my hand and the woman watched as I smoothed my blood over his arm.  
My blood forced his back in and sealed up the cut as if it had never happened, my own hand sealed as well.  
"I heal. Myself and others."  
"When she does that to me it temporarily starts chasing down and degrading the poison in my blood too."  
It did?  
Maybe I could remove his collar then.  
Between my blood and the candies, even the overdose shouldn't be enough to kill him.  
Larissa huffed.  
"I suppose out of all this, someone had to get something good." She started to try and measure me. "This won't work. Strip." She ordered.  
I stepped down and started to pull off my dress.  
"Is that really all you have?" She asked.  
I nodded.  
Her face softened a little as she sighed.  
"No wonder the boy can't seem to keep his hands off you."  
She quickly measured me where she needed and I pulled my dress back on.  
"I remember when Calvin and I were like you two. Young, madly in love, and inseparable. Now he just kind of lays there in his state and I'm alone."  
I frowned. "He's not dead?"  
"Might as well be. That bitch tried to take a piece of his heart and now he doesn't even breathe on his own." She said.  
Could I do it?  
I'd never tried healing someone that close to death.  
I took a breath. "Can I see him?" I asked.  
She sighed. "Why not? If he were alive like before, he'd get a kick out of seeing you two."  
I heard Senji sigh behind me.  
"Nix, he's not in a pretty state. When we say he's dead, it's partly true." He said as the woman led us back out.  
She collected up the clothes from the counter and put them in a bag.  
She typed something into her computer and Senji signed off on the pad on the counter.  
"Senji..."  
"It's fine. You wouldn't believe how much I have here. I wish I had this kind of money back when I was a cop."  
I still frowned as Larissa led us back to the elevator.  
The guards frowned, but let us on.  
She pushed the button for a floor two levels above ours.  
When it stopped, she led us out.  
xXx  
I'm not sure what I was expecting, but what I saw was not it.  
The room Larissa opened smelled like a morgue.  
The body on the bed wasn't quite dead though.  
Machines kept his blood flowing and his heart beating and his lungs breathing.  
I stepped to the side and touched his arm.  
I can't really say how I could tell, but I could just feel his body was rotting from the inside out.  
I stepped back as I could feel his pain too.  
"See." Senji pulled me close.  
I gripped his shirt and took a calming breath of his fresh scent.  
Vanilla and spice.  
"I want to try though." I said.  
He sighed and took off one of his rings. "We'll get you one of these too." He said.  
I nodded and the tiny blades popped free as I slipped it on my tiny thumb.  
I gripped it carefully as I stepped forward again. I glanced at Larissa. "You don't mind if I try to heal him?"  
"Honey, you'll either heal him or kill him, either would be a mercy on us both." She said. "I just don't have the heart to kill him myself, so he's been like this for four months."  
I nodded and held my hand.  
I steadied as Senji came up behind me to hold me.  
I cut into my hand again and willed my blood to drip down onto Calvin's sunken chest.  
It seemed to understand my desires and sank into his skin.  
He jolted once and the machines hooked to him beeped erratically.  
But they didn't stop working.  
He made a pained face as more of my blood dripped onto him and sank into him.  
Senji pulled my hand away and my cut sealed up.  
"Don't hurt yourself to save others." He mumbled.  
I did feel lightheaded.  
He was the only thing keeping me standing.  
I watched the needles in Calvin's flesh slowly push outward as my blood removed them.  
His collar beeped violently as my blood did the same for him as it had me. It shoved the pins out and the poison dripped onto the sheet under his neck instead of killing him.  
It clicked open and Senji reached for it.  
"Holy shit. You can do that too?" He asked.  
"My blood sees the poison and source as bad so it rejects them from the body." I said.  
I could see it as his body began to heal under the influence of my blood.  
Where his chest had been partially removed, new bone grew and hardened to support a strong muscle system.  
He took a deep breath, obviously the first in a long while if the sob from Larissa was a clue.  
It was a minute before he made a slight pained gasp and a sharp blade of blood pierced out of his skin.  
It coiled up in a scythe shape and Senji reached to touch it.  
He jolted as the blade of blood clung to his hand in a lump.  
I touched it on his hand and it sank into me.  
My blood had taken something more than the edge of death from Calvin.  
It had stolen a fraction of their Branch.  
The ability that they used was like a thread tying them together.  
My blood stole that ability and accessed the traces from Senji when I had healed over his cuts.  
My blood just learned new Branches by healing.  
I was more than just a healer now.  
I stepped away from Senji and cut my arm.  
I focused the scythe image and it formed.  
"What the fuck?" Senji sounded more than shocked.  
"I...their Branch ties them together and whatever it is, it unlocked my blood further." I said. "I got traces of your ability every time your blood came into contact with mine, and now I can access it." I frowned as I drew it back in. I looked at Larissa. "What do you guys do?"  
"We clone our opponent's skill so long as one of us has even a little of their blood on our hands." She said. "It makes it so that we fight like them."  
I nodded.  
That made sense.  
Thresher sharks hunted in pairs.  
The Branch made it so that they could use the same technique to 'hunt their prey' as it were.  
Senji made a low whistle.  
"Guess now you're not so defenseless." He said.  
"I won't fight. I'm not a fighter Senji. I'm still a healer. This might not be a lasting effect." I said.  
"We'll work on it, alright?" He said.  
I nodded and stepped closer to lean into him.  
Calvin made a noise as if he was about to wake and we turned to face him.  
I felt the rush right before everything went black and I felt Senji wrap his arms around me to hold me as I fell.  
xXx  
I woke up to warmth.  
And the humming of an old song my brother used to love.  
I opened my eyes to look at Senji as he held me.  
We were in his bed.  
He looked down at me.  
"You alright baby?" He asked.  
I nodded.  
"You just kind of collapsed. I figured it might be because of the fact that you healed him, but then I also thought about last night too."  
I sighed.  
"Last night was amazing, don't you dare feel guilty about it. I just passed out because my blood kind of drained my energy."  
Maybe I was tired and sore in good ways too, but I didn't want Senji to feel bad about what we did.  
He nodded, but I could still tell he thought he was responsible.  
I pushed myself to lean over him.  
"You keep thinking you did something bad and I'll think you don't want it again."  
That made him narrow his eyes at me.  
"That's low." He said.  
I shifted over to straddle his thighs.  
He had taken the dress off, but left the lingerie.  
I think he kind of liked the blue-gray material.  
Was I sure of what I wanted to do?  
Yes.  
Brave enough?  
Maybe not.  
"Then don't think about denying us both." I leaned down to kiss him.  
He groaned as I tilted my hips enough to rub on him.  
I could feel him getting harder under me.  
"Am I supposed to be thinking?" He mumbled.  
"Not really." I felt his hands move to my hips.  
He undid the ties at my sides deftly.  
The tiny bows were the only things keeping my panties on really.  
He pulled the fabric from me.  
"Are you sure you're okay?" He asked.  
"I know my limits." I said.  
I leaned to kiss him again as I undid the button on his jeans.  
I carefully pushed the zipper down and he groaned as I eased his jeans over his hips to completely free him.  
"Then why did you collapse?" He asked.  
I looked at his chest as I positioned him.  
His skin was slightly flushed from his arousal at my actions, but his mind just wouldn't give up.  
I slid down on him and he groaned again.  
It was such a sexy sound.  
He filled me so completely that for a moment I actually had to pause and savor the feeling.  
"Nix, please." He sounded strained.  
Torn between wanting to just give up or dig deeper.  
"Senji, I've never tried to heal anyone with more than sprains or a broken bone. When I heal someone, like with myself, I feel the pain. My body is designed to withstand a good amount because I'm a woman. But not like that. Calvin was rotting from the inside, my blood had to regrow vital pieces of his body, and when it came back, it brought all the pain he would have endured from the healing." I said. "Now please, drop it. I'm a healer, it's what I do."  
He pulled me down against his chest and held me.  
"I will never let you do that again." He said. I went to speak, but he touched my lips. "Hear me out. I know I can't stop you from healing. But I don't want you feeling that pain. There is a lot of pain out there worse than childbirth and your body is not designed to handle it. As we just proved today."  
"It's the only way I know how to heal." I mumbled.  
He made a tiny motion with his hips and I clenched my fingers on his chest, my nails very slightly digging in.  
"Take a tiny bit of your blood to heal then. Maybe that will help cut down the pain. Or just don't take it back into yourself." He said.  
"I'll...try." I said.  
I pushed up a little and moved on him, my long hair teasing his skin just a little.  
He closed his eyes for a moment before looking up at me.  
I knew he liked me looking at him when I came.  
And honestly, seeing his face and feeling how his body tightened when he did was pretty sexy.  
All of him was sexy to me.  
His hands pulled me down tight whenever I moved down on him.  
But it just wasn't enough. So close, but not quite.  
He gripped my thighs and I felt his thumb brush over my center.  
Just a little pressure on that bundle of nerves was perfect.  
"Senji." I dug my fingers in and felt my short nails prick his skin.  
"Fucking hell Nix." He groaned at the tiny pain. Less than he usually did to himself, but not normally in such a spot.  
His left hand moved to my back and he pulled me down to kiss him deeply.  
My finger went to the ring on the hand still holding my thigh and I flicked the blades out enough to cut my thumb.  
I pulled away from him enough to touch my blood to the tiny cuts I'd put on his chest.  
They healed instantly.  
Instead of focusing on just healing, I forced my blood to leave the pain of the healing with him.  
He groaned at the burning.  
"You feel this every time?" He asked as I took my blood back.  
My thumb burned very slightly.  
I nodded.  
He sighed.  
"Then don't heal these tiny things. I would rather feel them myself for a while anyway." He grinned.  
"Like little battle marks."  
"More like trophy scars." He said. "Marks like this and the scratches on my back show that I keep you very satisfied."  
I blushed a little at the way he said it.  
He rolled us both over and slid from me as he looked down at me.  
"I don't want to hurt you." I said.  
"Believe me, the scratches and those tiny cuts don't hurt." He said. "I like them."  
"Masochist." I mumbled as I looked away from him.  
"Only from certain pain." He kissed my neck and trailed down to my collarbone.  
As he arched over me, I caught sight of a set of scratches starting from his shoulder blades.  
My nails had done that to him. And he enjoyed it?  
He looked back at me before kissing me.  
"You stop feeling like you hurt me." He said. "Trust me, any man would gladly carry marks like that."  
"But..."  
"I will have to come up with some punishment for you if you stop doing that to me just to not hurt me." He said.  
How could I really say no when he seemed to want it so badly.  
I nodded.  
He moved to thrust into me and I gasped.  
No warning, nothing.  
I brought my hands up to his shoulders as he didn't even wait for me to adjust again.  
It felt almost rough, but so good too.  
He kissed me, bruising my lips with the way he nipped at me.  
I closed my eyes and let my nails run over his skin. Hard.  
If he wanted scratches, I wouldn't stop myself.  
It was hard to even think anyway.  
He groaned into my mouth before reaching between us and rubbing my clit.  
I cried out as my nails left deep scratches on his back as he kept thrusting into me while my body couldn't keep up.  
He pulled away from my mouth to breathe harsher as he strained to push me over again.  
I moved my hands to his shoulders and he used both hands to lift my hips slightly.  
The angle was perfect.  
"Senji." My nails scratched down his arms as I screamed his name.  
He hissed at the pain, but as I could see his face, he wasn't kidding. He did like it.  
Only this kind, only during sex.  
My gaze fell to the marks I left on him again.  
"Baby." He growled.  
I looked up at his face again.  
"I love you Fenix."  
I felt his hands tighten on my hips and the rest of his body tensed up slightly, but not quite there.  
"I love you too Senji." I reached to touch his cheek.  
It was what he was waiting for.  
He groaned my name as he thrust hard into me and let himself go.  
God that was sexy to see.  
The force even had me going over again.  
But I hadn't been lying.  
I really had fallen in love with a cop.  
He let me down gently and moved to lay beside me.  
"Give me a minute and we'll go take a shower." He mumbled.  
He sounded half sedated.  
But the way he held me close was sweet and loving.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**  
Senji left me in the gym, alone.  
Three days now he'd been training me on using his ability since I seemed to be retaining it.  
I heard laughter as the door opened again.  
Senji came back inside with another Deadman.  
"Fenix, this is Toto. Otherwise known as Mockingbird."  
The young man looked almost harmless. He had that kind of look to him that made me question why he was in here.  
Obviously he had a Branch, but what had he done?  
He had soft steps as he came closer to me.  
"So this is the Phoenix?" He brushed a hand through my hair as he circled me.  
He looked down at me almost sadly.  
"You...remind me of my sister."  
"Your sister?" I frowned.  
"She died protecting me during the quake and her love made me able to survive." He said softly.  
Senji nodded from the doorway.  
I looked at the sad eyes and could feel the nervousness from the boy.  
I reached to pull him close to hug him.  
In this whole madhouse, someone actually understood my pain perfectly.  
He hugged me back.  
"My brother died to protect me and I think his desire to keep me safe helped give me my healing." I said.  
Toto dropped to his knees and buried his face in my hair.  
I felt honest tears as he tightened his hold.  
"Toto was brought here when his Branch copied a rogue user and he killed his therapist for insulting his sister's sacrifice." Senji said.  
I pulled away from Toto a little.  
"Copy? You can copy Branches?" I asked.  
"It's my own power. Love Labyrinth." He said.  
"I brought him because he can teach you how to use my skills better than me."  
Toto frowned.  
"You can copy too?"  
"Sort of." I shrugged. "I'm a healer really, but when I healed another Deadman, his gift for temporarily copying another skill linked in to my blood."  
"Hmm, but the temporary effect hasn't gone away?" Toto asked.  
I shook my head and cut my finger on one of the rings Senji had bought me.  
I formed out the little scythe.  
"Crow Claw." Toto mused. He leaned down and before I could react, he had licked the blade of blood.  
I watched Senji shudder from the doorway.  
"Hmm, I can't seem to pick up either of the skills. But I think...if I can maybe get a taste for your ability, it might help me figure out how you're learning."  
"Like, taste my blood?" I asked.  
He nodded.  
"Toto has to actually consume blood to learn the skills, but he keeps them forever unlike Calvin and Larissa. It's why he's a scary little shit."  
Toto grinned.  
"Oh come on Senji, I promise I won't lick you again. Any time soon anyway."  
Senji shuddered.  
"You licked him?" I frowned.  
Toto shrugged. "I tried. Senji is...very guarded." He narrowed his eyes at Senji. "And while the blood is locked up in the Branch actively, I can't copy it."  
I couldn't help the laughter that bubbled up.  
I stumbled back against a weight bench. "You licked him."  
"It is not funny. It's disgusting." Senji snapped at me.  
It made me laugh harder.  
Toto smiled as he looked at me.  
"May I?" He asked.  
I cut my finger cleanly from where it had healed over the scythe and before it could heal up, Toto licked at the blood.  
"Damn that works fast." He said as he watched my finger heal.  
"It does kind of make me immortal. Unless I want to die I guess. I'm getting better at forcing my blood to do what I want since Senji has been training me." I said.  
I watched the boy cut his own hand and it healed up like mine.  
"Well now, this is interesting. With my copy ability, I think you'd better be able to grasp the concepts of skills from other Deadmen, rather than Threshers skill."  
I nodded. "Maybe."  
He held out his hand. "Would you like to see if you can take mine?" He asked.  
I frowned.  
"I only got Calvin's because I healed him."  
Toto pulled a knife from his pocket and stabbed himself through the hand.  
His wound didn't heal instantly and I realized he had amazing control of the power he had taken from me.  
I cut my finger and went to heal his wound.  
The burning was worse than ever, and the fire that hit me when I brought my blood back was enough to have me curling over in pain.  
I felt Senji at my side, holding me as the heat died down.  
I could feel it in me as my blood took Toto's skill and worked with it. It strung it together with Calvin's and used the pieces of both to create a complete copy ability.  
I wouldn't need to touch the blood or heal to get a skill now.  
I just had to touch the Deadman in question. Blood would still work, but it wasn't necessary.  
"Baby, you alright?" Senji asked.  
I nodded and looked up at Toto.  
He looked genuinely concerned as well.  
I reached to take Senji's hand and pulled the full length of his Branch into me.  
My own filed it away and I could just picture it with different compartments for each skill I copied.  
I cut into my arm and the scythe came out perfectly now.  
"Good." Toto said. "What I do to learn another skill is basically just picture how the other Deadmen use theirs and my own skill seems to guide it along in copying it."  
I nodded.  
That was how it worked.  
"Well, if you guys don't need me, I've got a couple plans to work on."  
I watched him turn to leave.  
"Goodbye sis." He said from the doorway.  
"Creepy little shit." Senji muttered.  
I heard Toto laughing as he walked away.  
But now I could fully control both my gift and Senji's.  
I stood up and held up my arm.  
Senji looked at the scythe.  
"Well, I guess he does have his use. You feel good about that size?"  
I nodded.  
He went to the side of the gym and pulled his jacket from a bench.  
I pulled the scythe back into me and my healing blood sealed up the opening.  
xXx  
I thought it might be a month, maybe two, before either of us got picked for a fight again.  
Not three weeks after our fight.  
When the announcement came on, I feared it. Every time.  
This time I jolted as I heard Crow.  
I looked at Senji, he didn't seem as happy about it as before.  
Maybe it was the fact that his opponent was the same man he had shown fighting that first time I met him. The one he hated.  
"Nix, watch the fight tonight." He said.  
I frowned. He knew I hated seeing the fighting.  
It was why I was dreading the next time I had to be chosen.  
"But..."  
"Please, I want you to see me kill him. That man is the same one who nearly ruined my life and career. Spider was the leader of Goreless Peace and when I found out he was in here, I've been waiting for the chance to finish what my mentor wouldn't let me do last time." Senji said.  
I nodded.  
"Maybe he didn't let you because he doesn't want to see you become a killer."  
Senji touched his brow where he had his tattoo. I had never questioned it before, but the letters had always bothered me.  
"Guess you're right, but that shit nearly took him from me too, and killed the people I cared for. I...I'm not sure if I can hold back from killing him, but...I'll try. For you." Senji said.  
I leaned against him.  
"Good. I'm sure your mentor wouldn't want you to kill out of anger."  
He laughed. "No, but if I come across the man who killed him and my crew, I will be killing him. No doubt about it."  
I didn't doubt that.  
That did explain the letters though.  
The four men from his team as a cop.  
I'd heard some teams were as close as family.  
Hopefully Senji would hold back. But if it came down to him or his opponent, I'd forgive him.  
I didn't want to lose Senji down here.  
He stood up and I looked at him as he shed his jacket and tossed it to the chair at the table.  
He turned to face me.  
I looked up as he leaned down and kissed me.  
"Once more before I leave?"  
I nodded.  
He was honestly worried about this fight.  
I let him take my clothes off and he was so very gentle with me.  
But I could feel his hands shaking.  
I reached to hold him as he slid into me.  
This man had nearly killed him before, but he had been the winner of that fight.  
Senji didn't speak, but I stared into his eyes.  
He feared that he would either come back changed, or not at all.  
What if he was the loser?  
I pulled him down to kiss him again.  
I cut my thumb on my ring and forced some of my blood into him.  
He jolted.  
"It'll heal you if it needs to. Just enough to keep you alive. But it'll wear off in a few hours. After your fight." I said.  
He nodded. "Thank you." He kissed me. "For loving me, for dealing with my stubbornness, and for having faith in me."  
I wrapped my arms around his neck. "Always."  
He pushed me over the edge, always concerned with making sure I came first.  
He spilled into me and I realized we never once used any protection in the past few weeks.  
And I hadn't had a cycle yet this month.  
I brushed it off.  
He didn't need to worry.  
xXx  
I watched Senji go past the doors leading to the Cage.  
Izzy waved at me, but I couldn't put any feeling behind my wave back.  
I hurried back to our room and saw Minatsuki leaning against the wall.  
"You know, I don't do this shit for anyone." She held up the bag for me.  
I took it and hugged her.  
She seemed genuinely confused but didn't push away instantly.  
Maybe she really did feel scared sometimes too.  
I went into our room and set the bag on Senji's bed.  
I was nervous as I pulled out the box.  
Where she had gotten it, I didn't care, but she had pulled through and kept it secret from Senji.  
I carried it into the bathroom and closed the door.  
xXx  
I sat at the table in the main room where most Deadmen were watching the fight from.  
I heard the announcer introduce them both and pushed up.  
I moved past some of the people who should have scared me.  
One Deadman went to touch me and I felt him recoil as Toto came up behind me and put his arm over my shoulders.  
"Shit, she's got even Mockingbird on her side." I heard someone whisper.  
"Fucking hell, not enough she has to be a self healer, she has Crow in her bed and Hummingbird at her back, now she even has him watching out for her."  
"Don't sweat it sis. Haters will hate and then die." Toto said as I faced the screen.  
His warm arm kept me grounded as I watched Senji fight.  
"How did you know I was here?" I asked Toto.  
"Mmm, had a feeling." He said. "I just knew since Senji was fighting that you'd need someone to hold on to."  
I wrapped my left arm around his waist.  
He was such a thin kid.  
He reminded me of myself.  
But that made sense I suppose.  
He was in a similar circumstance as I was.  
I watched Senji try to hold back, but something made him snap.  
"Oh dear. Crow is well over the edge now. I suppose comments about the old life are a bit out of bounds. Best keep this in mind if you ever get paired up against him my fellow Deadman watchers."  
Senji broke every web thrown at him and I could see the other man struggle to not show the fear he felt.  
I felt Toto turn my head to his shoulder and heard everyone gasp as the sound stopped in the fight.  
"Did he..." I started, muffled by Toto's shirt.  
"Shh, you don't even want to know." He said.  
He turned to walk me out and as the crowd parted from us, I caught sight of the other screen.  
I wanted the throw up.  
The blood wasn't the sickest part of that shot.  
What was worse was the sight of Senji covered in it and the man in front of him in several pieces.  
No, he hadn't held back at all.  
Toto walked me to Senji's room.  
"Sis, will you...still be with him?" Toto asked. He sounded seriously concerned.  
For my safety?  
"Senji would never hurt me." I said as I leaned against the door. "He...already told me he'd probably kill him."  
Toto nodded.  
He pulled me closer to hug me.  
I still felt sick as I turned to open the door.  
He stood there until I closed it.  
xXx  
Senji walked into our room and didn't even look at me.  
He just dropped his bloody jacket and opened the bathroom door.  
I heard him shed his pants too as I got up from the bed and picked up his jacket.  
It wasn't exactly coated in blood, but as the shower started up, I tried to be careful about not touching any of the blood.  
I carried it into the bathroom and used a cloth at the sink to wipe at the drying blood.  
He stood still in the shower as I finished cleaning his jacket, still letting the water wash away the blood.  
I turned to face him as he faced the spray.  
I don't think he heard me as I shrugged off my clothes and set them on the counter beside his clean jacket.  
He tensed as I pulled the clear curtain back enough to slip in with him.  
"Senji?" I reached to touch his back.  
The cuts were closed up thanks to my blood, but I saw how many there were. Those webs of blood were dangerous.  
And now I had the power too, from the blood on his jacket.  
I refused to ever use that power in front of him.  
He jolted.  
He opened his eyes and I moved to stand in front of him, feeling the scalding water.  
I reached back to turn the heat down, seeing how it was already burning his skin.  
"Baby?" I touched his chest.  
"Why doesn't it hurt? Knowing I killed him out of rage?" He spoke quietly. "Is it really because I know he needed to die? Because now I know those kids got revenge? Through me?"  
I reached to pull him to hold me.  
His arms wrapped around me and I stood on my toes to put an open kiss over his heart.  
"He killed the people you cared for and now you can feel at ease knowing you took care of their killer." I said.  
"But he was already in prison for murder." He said.  
I scoffed. "Look at this place Senji, murderers love it here. He wasn't feeling punishment here. He was terrified of you when he died. He knew it was coming and he knew why he was going to die."  
He sighed. "You're right. I shouldn't be upset that I'm glad he's dead."  
I nodded.  
If he was as bad as Senji said and I remember from being on the streets, then he got what he deserved.  
Now I knew just who was responsible for stopping that gang before.  
I put my cheek on his chest.  
Senji took a deep breath and I reached for the washcloth and soap.  
He stood still as I scrubbed at his skin to remove all traces of the fight.  
It wasn't like when he had washed me.  
I knew better than to try and do that now.  
Not with him on edge like this.  
I rinsed out the cloth and he reached to shut the water off.  
I tried to squeeze water from my hair as Senji pulled his towel from the hook and dried off.  
I wrapped mine around myself as he wrapped his around his hips.  
He glanced at the small trashcan beside the counter and I winced as he reached for the little box.  
"You..." He frowned at me.  
"I just wanted to check. Since we..." I looked down as he opened it and pulled out the reading.  
He shoved it back in and ran his hand over his hair.  
"Senji..." I started.  
"Shit." He leaned on the counter.  
I stepped towards him but didn't move closer.  
"Is it..." He looked at me.  
I nodded.  
He sighed.  
"I know you don't really want a baby, and I never thought my healing would let me, but-" He reached out to pull me close.  
"No, I didn't want to have kids in here. Not in this hell. But with you? Absolutely. I just...I don't want you in here pregnant. The last time that happened, it was not good. Owl lost his family and went mad. I...I can't do that." He said. "I'm not sane like he was."  
I reached up to pull him down to kiss me.  
"You're perfectly sane Senji." I said. I looked at the ring on my hand as it stayed on his cheek.  
The simple gold and diamond band had cost a pretty penny, but no more than it would outside either.  
He had wanted something to show me that he wanted forever with me.  
I didn't need jewelry, but it was beautiful.  
"What kind of insane man keeps trying to keep a self healer safe?"  
"Baby, I think that defines insane." He laughed.  
He held me closer.  
"But, you're sure you want a kid with me?" He asked.  
I frowned at him.  
"You'll be a great father Senji. You're caring, protective, supportive, a child couldn't want more than a father who loves them." I said. I met his eyes. "You will, right? Love our child?"  
He sighed.  
"Of course. Almost as much as I love you." He said. "But I need to get you out of here."  
I frowned.  
"I'll make a couple calls. See if I can't pull some favors." He said.  
"But what about you?"  
"I'll get out of here too, but it'll take longer to clear me. You're just in for trivialities. I'm actually in for murder. Of my team."  
I looked up at him.  
The men he loved and protected as brothers and someone really believed he could kill them?  
His own mentor?  
"I'll work on it tomorrow. I'm just a bit tired right now." He said.  
I nodded.  
I followed him out and he reached in his cabinet for a pair of loose gym pants.  
I pulled on my gown and he hung our towels back up.  
As I was sitting on the bed, he reached to brush his fingers through my damp hair.  
I let him comb through it and braid it for me.  
"I do love your hair." He said softly. "Long and silky."  
I sighed.  
He laid back on the bed and I laid beside him before he tossed the blanket over me and pulled me to snuggle up to him.  
xXx  
His calls were made from a small room Izzy let him use.  
He waited in the other room with me.  
"It's rare for Crow to actually make multiple calls. I remember when he first got brought in he had made several calls to the families of the men he supposedly killed." Izzy said. "I listened to the recordings and none of them thought he'd done it. They all had faith that he was set up. But his Branch scared them and one widow even said that he might be better off learning to properly use it before thinking of trying to get released."  
I looked at him.  
"You don't know what an innocent man looks like until you watch someone like him break down to a little boy begging for forgiveness for a crime he didn't even do." Izzy looked at the tape spinning on the wall. It was recording Senji.  
"Who is he calling?"  
"I think he's getting one of the widows to take your case on. She was a top notch lawyer before her husband was killed. Even now, Senji sets out half the money he earns in here and sends it to the families." Izzy said. "So I think she'll take it just because what killer sends the family money every month?"  
I frowned. "And yet he still has so much money?"  
Izzy shrugged. "His first few fights were pretty popular and he's gotten a lot in almost the two and a half years he's been here."  
"I thought this place has only been up and running for a few months?"  
Izzy laughed. "No, the amusement part has, but it was still a prison for several years before that. Someplace had to exist to hold criminals like Minatsuki. The Carnival has been going on for a while."  
I sighed.  
Senji knocked on the window and Izzy pushed the button for the door release.  
I turned to see him pulling the tape from the wall and running it over his lighter and watching it crinkle up.  
"Off the records. It's why I use this room." He said.  
I went to the door and stepped out in the hall and saw Senji.  
"Clara says she'll pull up everything on your case and get you pulled out of here." He said.  
"And you?" I asked.  
"She can't touch my case since she's related, but she'll see if her boss can find someone good to take me on."  
I nodded and he pulled me close as Izzy came out.  
"That's all you needed?" He asked.  
Senji nodded.  
He turned to lead me back to our room.  
xXx  
I stared at the door as Izzy waited for me to step forward.  
A fight.  
Less than a week after Senji's.  
Senji held my hand up to kiss my fingers.  
"You'll be fine baby. Just remember to use my skills and you'll be alright. You're really good already." He said.  
I took a breath and nodded.  
I just didn't want to get hurt and risk our baby.  
Izzy moved to open the door and I clenched my fingers around Senji's hand.  
"Be quick and efficient and you'll be alright." He said. He looked at Izzy. "Are you sure I can't trade places with her?"  
He shook his head. But he motioned for Senji to come closer.  
"Just stay on the inside of the door by the wall."  
I was only slightly relieved that he was allowing Senji inside.  
I walked in and stepped into the tiny cage and looked at Senji as the other guard closed the gate on me.  
"You will refrain from interfering." He said to Senji as my cage was raised.  
Senji moved to raise his hands in a surrender pose.  
I took a deep breath and held my hand over my stomach.  
I covered my mouth as well to make it seem like I was worried about being sick.  
I looked at the other cage being lowered.  
Senji had told me about this man. He could do similar things as Senji, but much shorter range.  
Like knives instead of the scythe.  
I stepped out of the cage and ignored the announcer.  
I took a breath again at the slightly confused look on the man's face.  
"Hold up, is this a joke? She couldn't even fight Crow. How am I different?"  
It clicked to me.  
Closer range. I could seal his cuts with my own blood.  
Senji wanted me to make sure I remembered I could use Crow Claw too, but that I was a healer.  
I could do this.  
He shook off his irritation at going up against me and I watched Senji step forward as the man cut his hands to form knives out the back of each knuckle.  
I stepped to the side as he came at me and cut my palm with my own ring.  
As his hand came past me, I covered his fist and my blood sealed it.  
He swung with his other hand. "Little bitch."  
I covered his other hand with my other palm and felt my blood absorbing his skill.  
He moved to kick me, but I blocked like Senji had taught me.  
He stumbled back.  
"What the fuck? Has Crow been teaching you since you lost to him?"  
I smiled. "Yes. He has."  
I moved forward and hit him twice, once in the sternum, making him gasp as it knocked the wind out of him and then elbowed him in the throat.  
As he fell back, I went forward again and slammed my palm on his forehead.  
His eyes rolled as he went down.  
At least he'd be unconscious for the penalty.  
I cut my finger again and forced a little of my blood to heal whatever damage the doctor caused him.  
Just because I managed to beat him, it wasn't fair that he was considered a loser.  
I moved towards the door to the cage and Senji stepped up to meet me.  
He pulled me close and settled his hand on my hip.  
"You did great baby." He said softly.  
He turned to lead me back out.  
"Never even had to use my skills."  
He sounded impressed.  
I reached to cut over my knuckles with the ring and showed him the knives.  
He laughed as he pulled the door open.  
Izzy congratulated me on such a quick victory and walked with us towards our room.  
"I got your stuff sent up, so it should be here in a minute." Izzy said.  
Senji nodded.  
I frowned.  
He looked down at me.  
"I knew you'd win, so I had dinner prepared." Senji said.  
I nodded.  
He was too sweet to me.  
Loki would have loved him.  
Izzy turned to go back to his normal station and Senji opened the door for me.  
I stepped inside as he kept his hand on my back.  
His warm hand was soothing.  
I sat at the table and he stood to wait for the food.  
"I was really scared." I said.  
He leaned down to kiss me.  
"But you did great." He said.  
I shook my head.  
"Not for me. I was worried I'd lose again and Rei would do something that might hurt our baby and I don't know if I can heal us both."  
"Yeah, that worried me too for a moment, but I figured if it came down to it, you could use either my ability or Minatsuki's."  
I shook slightly.  
That girl scared me honestly.  
She could be sweet when she wanted, but other times she was a real bitch.  
"But everything turned out okay, so it's good." He said.  
I nodded.  
He turned as he heard the knock and moved towards the door.  
He pulled it open and I saw two guards standing there.  
Not with our food.  
"What?" He snapped.  
They flinched.  
Senji scared a lot of the guards. Did any know that he was a cop?  
"Phoenix is being summoned." The one on the left said.  
Senji frowned as I got up.  
He moved to grab his jacket.  
"Only Phoenix." The other said.  
"Fuck you." Senji pulled his jacket on.  
I moved to grip his jacket as he wrapped his arm around my shoulders.  
The two guards looked unsure but motioned to follow them.  
Senji kept me close and I was thankful as three more guards joined at the doors out of the Block.  
I felt terrified as we walked to an office.  
Tamaki sat in the chair at the desk, but another woman sat with a briefcase at her side.  
Her look said lawyer.  
She looked up as we walked in.  
"Senji." She said with a smile.  
"Clara." He nodded at her.  
This was his friend's widow.  
"Marcel has taken you on." She said.  
Senji shrugged. "He'll do. Not as good as you, but he'll do."  
She laughed. "I'll let him know."  
She stood and faced Tamaki.  
"Miss Fenix Halure will be in my custody now. Thank you for seeing to the paperwork Mister Tamaki."  
She came towards us and I sighed.  
"You do work fast and thorough." Senji said.  
"Of course. When you called, I started that moment. If it meant enough for you to ask, I'd do it." She said. "Now, Miss Fenix and I have a date at my home for a nice quiet dinner with a good friend of mine."  
Senji nodded. "Good. Get her out of here Clara."  
I looked at Senji.  
"Feh." Tamaki started out of the room through the side door and two guards moved out as well.  
Senji looked down at me.  
"I don't want to leave without you." I said.  
"It'll be fine. You'll be alright." He said.  
I wrapped my arms around him.  
"Promise you'll be alright when you do get out." I mumbled.  
"I...I'll try." He said.  
I cut my hand on my ring and he tried to pull away from me.  
I put my hand on his bare chest and let my blood sink into him.  
"I won't let you die in here Senji."  
He sighed as I pulled my hand back.  
"I'll be out soon enough. And then I'll be right with you again." He took my hand and kissed my fingers over the band he'd bought me. "I promise."  
I pulled him down to kiss him.  
"I'll heal you as long as I can." I said. "I'm not sure how long it'll last, but I tried to will it into you."  
He nodded. "Just stay with Clara and what few friends I do have still and you'll be alright."  
I sighed as he stepped away.  
Clara took my arm and started to guide me away.  
I took one last look at Senji before the door closed and the two guards started to lead us out.  
Clara was quiet for a good while until we were into the civilian portion of the place.  
She headed for a black sedan at the main gates.  
"Senji has never shown that much affection towards anyone since Kan and the rest." She said.  
"What was he like before this place?" I asked as I opened the passenger door.  
"He...was a kind young man. A good cop, but a little reckless. He always tried to do what was right for people. He hates gangs."  
"He...killed that leader of Goreless peace." I said.  
She looked almost sad as she started away from the place.  
I turned in my seat enough to see it one last time.  
No one knew about the Deadmen on the outside.  
No one but me.  
Even Senji said himself that the people he called had no idea where he actually was.  
"Domon will be a bit sad to hear that." She said.  
"Did they...know about his Crow Claw?"  
"The blood blades? Yes. His team did. They were constantly giving him a hard time about his reliance on them. But he wanted to be a good cop despite his cursed blood and the academy officials respected that. Some other shitheads didn't, but Senji is a good man." She said.  
I put my hand over my stomach as I sat right.  
"I know. He is a very good man."  
"You're pregnant?" She asked.  
I flushed slightly.  
"Yes...Senji wanted me out so badly because of how dangerous it would be for me in there."  
She frowned.  
"I went through your files. Nothing in them dictated a need for prison. What is really going on there?" She asked.  
"Well..." I frowned. How much should I tell? How much would get her in danger.  
Anything. She was in danger just by having me in her car.  
"The prison itself is real. But there is a secret facility inside designed to hold people like Senji and myself. And they pit us against each other for extra revenue. They call it Carnival Corpse. I'm not good a fighting, since I only heal, but Senji is very good. He's one of the few who hasn't been defeated. Toto is another, and he's a good kid too, but he did kill his therapist for dishonoring his older sister who died in the quake to save him. And there are a lot of others." I said.  
She was quiet for a long moment.  
"People like Senji? And you?"  
I nodded. "They call us Deadmen in there. Hence Deadman Wonderland. And I'd say on an average month, there is at least a hundred of us in there."  
"And you heal?" She frowned.  
I nodded. "I can heal myself from even death."  
"Just like him then." She mumbled.  
"Him?"  
"A boy my brother's police force found almost a month after the quake. He is on a squad in Hokkaido, so he took the kid with him. They say that they think he got stabbed and thought dead so he was buried."  
My stomach dropped.  
It couldn't be.  
"Loki?" I whispered.  
She looked at me as she stopped at a red light.  
"Yes. He just transferred over here when he heard rumors of the prison being more than it seemed." She said. "Said he caught a video of some fake fight, but the girl looked like someone he knew."  
My brother had watched my fight with Senji?  
I shook. I felt sick.  
How would he accept Senji when the only thing he knew about him personally was from that fight?  
Senji killed me in that fight.  
"I want to see him." I said.  
She frowned.  
"He's staying with us for the time being." She said.  
I nodded.  
I couldn't speak as she drove into a calm, gated neighborhood. A secure place against anyone but a Deadman. Like me.  
When she pulled into a driveway, I was out before she was.  
The front door opened and I stood shocked.  
The man from that single picture Senji kept of his crew stepped out.  
Kan was more than alive.  
But it was the man who followed him that made me stop.  
Kan greeted his wife as I stumbled forward.  
I finally caught my feet and ran to the man who came out.  
My brother.  
Loki.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**  
I held Loki tight as I cried on his shirt.  
"I thought you were dead." I said. "You died. I watched you die." I gripped his shirt and he held me.  
"Come inside Fe." He said.  
He led me in to a couch.  
"You were dead."  
"So she is someone you knew?" Clara asked.  
"My sister. I died to save her, not thinking I'd come back. Or that we would share a gift like this. The inability to die is very powerful." He said as I held his arm.  
"When Kan and Maro found you..." She started.  
"I buried him. I thought he was dead." I said. "Then the older people who helped me bury him took me into their community until I was thrown in prison for someone lying."  
Loki held my hand. "God I'm sorry Fe. But after they found me, I tried to look for you and I couldn't find you. Maro offered to let me go through the police academy on his dime and use the system to find you. I finally found you by accident when one of our busts had his computer open and logged into the Carnival Corpse game. I knew it was you the moment I saw you and Maro gave me time off the other day to come and see if I could get to you in there. Then Clara said she got a case pro-bono about getting a Fenix from prison and I just knew it was you. I had to see you again and beg you to forgive me."  
"Me?" I gasped as I moved away enough to look at him. "I buried you Lo, you should hate me for that. I didn't even think to make sure you were really dead. But you were. I knew it. If either of us should beg forgiveness, it's me."  
"Of course I'd forgive you Fe." He pulled me close. "That's what older brothers do. We forgive and protect our little sisters."  
I sighed. "Will you...be staying around?"  
"I'm putting in a request of transfer as soon as the department chair is in office tomorrow." He said. "I'm not leaving you again Fe. Never again."  
"I'm glad she did turn out to be who you were looking for." Kan said.  
"Which reminds me, you're supposed to be dead too." I frowned at him.  
Loki laughed.  
"Yeah...I was visiting at the time they decided to go off half cocked without their gifted teammate and when they were killed and Kiyomasa thrown in prison for murder, I tried to heal them. I mean, Kan and Clara have been very nice to me for years. I didn't think I could do all four of them, but I just about killed myself permanently trying. Luckily Clara tried calling Kan and he woke up to the ringing as I was dying of blood loss. Pretty much the only thing either of us can't heal from."  
I sighed.  
"Senji...would be happy to know they're alright."  
"We're still waiting for him to come back when he gets out. Badge or not. We'll always be a team." Kan said. "For now, we're just a four man cell with nothing dangerous."  
I nodded.  
I wish I could tell Senji his crew was alive.  
"He...really thinks that you're all dead. He even tattooed your initials to remind himself of what he lost. In case he ever lost himself too." I said.  
"Damn, that shit really is crazy." Kan laughed. "But he's definitely a brother to me if not by blood then by heart."  
I nodded.  
I felt so tired as I yawned.  
Clara smiled. "You need some rest. I'll get the spare room set up."  
"It's fine, she can stay with me." Loki said.  
"No, I'll stay by myself." I said.  
He frowned. "You're sure the new place won't scare you?" He asked.  
The thought made me think back to the first night in the Deadman Wonderland.  
I smiled at the memory.  
"No, I'll be alright. Senji promised me that his friends were my friends too. And you're still here. I just...need a bit of space to let this sink in." I said.  
Loki nodded.  
Clara led me upstairs to a small bedroom with a twin bed. Not much smaller than what Senji and I shared.  
I looked at her.  
"Did...Senji have a home?"  
She frowned.  
"Yes. A place his parents lived in until the quake. It's abandoned right now, but it's just down the road. He never really stayed there. Always at an apartment in town."  
I sighed.  
I had hoped he would have a place with memory of him. Or at least his scent.  
Clara looked at me sadly for a moment.  
"Give me a minute and I'll be back."  
I nodded and sat on the plush bed.  
I heard her talking to Kan in the next room.  
"Is she like Senji and Loki?"  
"More like Loki, but yes. Please don't worry Kan, she's not dangerous like Senji was."  
"I'm not worried about us. I'm just worried that she was in that hell. I know if Senji was around her, he kept her safe, but since he's not...I'm just worried that him not being here might hurt her mentally. She seems sweet and I'd hate to see a good girl like her break down."  
"She'll be strong. After all, Senji loves her. You didn't see him Kan. He looked almost lost when I took her. Lost, yet satisfied. He was glad she was free, but I could see that her being gone was going to hit him hard. I've never seen Senji in love before."  
"She must be really special then. To break that hard shell. I thought nothing but a swift kick in the ass by Domon could do that."  
I stifled a laugh.  
His mentor sounded like someone I should meet.  
"What are you pulling that out for?" Kan asked.  
"I know it isn't much, but I think it'll help her right now. It still...has his cologne on it. It might be something for her while Marcel works on his case."  
"I...I guess. She does need something to sleep in. I still have an old bottle of that junk he wore if you want to give that to her too."  
I heard Kan dig in a drawer and focused on not hearing them as a knock sounded on my door.  
Loki pushed it open.  
He had changed into slacks and a tank from his uniform.  
I had to admit, he did look good in a uniform.  
"You doing alright?"  
I laughed.  
He frowned.  
"Sorry. It's just...Senji is always asking me that. The self healer..." I scoffed.  
"Self healing has nothing to do with it. I watched Crow kill you Fe. I know this Senji isn't all they crack him up to be." I held up my hand.  
"Don't you dare badmouth him Lo. Senji never meant to kill me. Only make me lose. I rigged our fight. I just didn't anticipate the stumble. He killed me, but you should have seen his face Lo. The camera probably didn't show you that. He was horrified. He thought he had actually killed me. You heard him cussing at the cameras over me."  
"And then I saw him take your hand off Fe, with his own Crow Claw."  
"Only because I asked him to. The penalty for my loss was my hand and I knew it would hurt less to have him do it than the painful torture that woman would have done. Senji has done nothing with the intention of hurting me. He loves me."  
"And I'm supposed to accept that without ever meeting him myself is that it? I'm still your brother Fenix. And you still promised to let me vet anyone you chose."  
I stood up.  
"And Senji is more than perfect for me. He cares whether I'm alright. He spoiled me in there. No one came near me between him and Toto. When Senji had to fight, those bastards would have hurt me if not for Toto and knowing Senji would rip them apart. He did things for me no one has ever done. Not since you died." I said. I sat back down as I felt lightheaded.  
"I...I still want to meet him and judge for myself." He said. "He's violent and unpredictable."  
I cut into my hand and held up the blade of blood. Senji's skill.  
"He made sure I could protect myself in the event he got me out. Toto gave me his ability and Calvin gave me theirs. I've copied most of the Deadmen in there. I'm more unpredictable than Senji could ever be."  
Loki came closer and covered my hand with his.  
"Look, I can see you care about him, but I'm just being a worrying older brother. Let me." He said. He cut his hand on my short scythe and he healed my cut.  
It felt so different from healing myself.  
No burn, nothing.  
Loki flinched as his blood came back to him.  
"I love him Lo." I put my hand over my stomach. "And he promised to be with me when he's out." I twisted the ring on my finger, feeling the diamonds. "So please don't be hard on him."  
Loki nodded. "I'll try." He stepped away as Clara stood in the doorway.  
He looked at me.  
"Goodnight Fe."  
"Night Lo." I said.  
Clara moved to let him leave and brought a button up shirt to me.  
I recognized it as one of Senji's uniform shirts.  
She held it out.  
I took it, feeling the worn fabric. It was soft from his wearing it two years ago.  
I held it up to my face and breathed in as she set a bottle of cologne on the table beside the bed.  
"I don't think it'll be too upsetting to Senji for you to wear his shirt to bed." She smiled.  
I breathed in his scent.  
I'd seen that same bottle of cologne in his cabinet in our room.  
I nodded at her words.  
She moved to sit beside me and hugged me.  
"If you need anything, just ask me. Senji was right. His friends will take care of you. He's still family to us even if he is a shit sometimes. But every family has to have that one black sheep."  
I smiled.  
He was that sheep. "More like a wolf in sheep clothes."  
She laughed. "Yeah, he is the violent one of our family. First to jump into a fight, last to leave it. But he's got a heart as big as the sun. And we do love him for all his stupidity."  
She stood up.  
"Goodnight Fenix."  
I nodded. "Night Clara."  
She closed the door behind her and I stood up to close the curtains and lock the door.  
I habit from Deadman Wonderland I guess.  
I'd leave it unlocked tomorrow.  
I pulled my clothes off and held up Senji's shirt.  
It still smelled like him.  
I shrugged it on and did up the buttons.  
It hung down to brush the bottom of my thighs, like my hair.  
Plenty enough to give me a sense of comfort.  
I laid down after shutting the light off.  
The room was unfamiliar.  
Once was that I'd go to Loki for comfort.  
But now, I couldn't even think to go to anyone except Senji.  
xXx  
For four days I've been waiting for hell to break loose.  
Loki had gone back to get his things and of course the moment he left, Kan took a defensive stance at the first knock on the door.  
I watched him look at whoever it was.  
"Is Fenix here?"  
I recognized that voice.  
I got up from the desk where I was looking online at possible jobs.  
Clara said that I was welcome to use the money Senji had sent her for the families.  
None of them had felt it was right to take his money since he didn't kill his crew.  
They had set it up in an account that was earning almost as much in interest every month as I could spend in a year.  
Needless to say, Senji was filthy rich out here too. He just didn't know it.  
I still wanted to find some work. But so far, nothing appealed.  
I moved towards the front door and looked past Kan.  
"Izzy?" I frowned.  
"I thought I'd find you here." He said.  
"What are you doing here?" I asked.  
"I got out. I just couldn't do it anymore. Not while seeing people like you and Senji. I told him I'd keep you safe. He didn't think I'd get out." Izzy said.  
I nodded.  
"You're lying." I said.  
Kan kept himself a little between myself and Izzy.  
"Damn. You're good."  
"Why are you here?" Kan asked. "And you better realize you're on the private property of a police officer."  
"Sorry. It's just...the big boss wanted to see you." Izzy said.  
"I'm not going back." I said.  
"He said he'd have Crow killed if you resisted."  
I shook my head. "Senji isn't so easy to kill. Like Toto said, he's always guarded. If even Mockingbird can't get close enough to taste his blood, there is no one who can hurt Senji. Besides, Toto promised me he'd watch out for Senji. If you think anyone can take them both on..."  
Izzy paled a little. "I'll let them know Mockingbird is on his side too."  
"No." I shook my head. "You tell the boss that if he tries to touch Senji, I will take that whole place apart. I've picked up the skills of every Deadman in there and some of them have some very interesting gifts."  
Izzy sighed. "Will do. But you are doing alright, right?"  
I nodded.  
"Good, Senji will be glad to hear that." Izzy said.  
I watched him turn to leave.  
I moved back to the couch and dropped.  
Kan came to sit with me.  
"Tell me everything." He said.  
"About?" I frowned.  
"This Crow thing, Toto, Mockingbird, Deadman, everything." He said.  
I sighed.  
I started to tell him about everything from the prison.  
xXx  
I spritzed a tiny bit of cologne on Senji's shirt and held it up to my face.  
It was starting to just smell like his cologne now.  
Which was fine, but I missed him.  
Clara had taken me shopping, so I didn't have to wear his shirt, but it made me feel safe.  
I liked it.  
I had logged in to the Carnival Corpse broadcast on Clara's computer after Izzy came by and was waiting to see when Senji would fight again.  
Kan had called all the guys over and helped me set it up on the tv so they could watch all his old matches.  
His mentor was a nice older man who treated me like a daughter already.  
His other friends took me in as a sister too.  
We had just sat through and watched all of Senji's old fights.  
They had commented on how rough and violent he was in there.  
But he wasn't. He never killed until I met him and he took out that gang member.  
Domon rubbed at an old scar when he watched that fight.  
I moved to lay on the bed and curled up in Senji's shirt.  
It had been three weeks since I left.  
How was he doing?  
Izzy hadn't come by again, so I had no idea.  
I looked at the picture Clara had given me of Senji from a few years ago.  
It was old and he was in his uniform, tugging at his tie, but it was perfect.  
I reached over and clutched the small frame to my chest.  
Not having his warmth was hurting me more than I'd thought.  
xXx  
It was five weeks since I left that I caught his name in a matchup.  
I immediately logged in to watch him fight against a new kid.  
The guys came to watch.  
"New kid is right. Senji is going to kick his ass."  
I shook my head. "He'll teach him how to fight."  
"Doesn't look like it to me."  
I watched him fight this Ganta child.  
He was younger than Minatsuki.  
I frowned as Senji treated him far rougher than he had me.  
But he looked alright.  
He made a very slight wince and I realized his sternum was cracked.  
Something had hurt him.  
He taunted the kid.  
I turned away as the kid shot the microphone at the top of the cage.  
That was one skill I didn't have. Projectile.  
I heard the guys gasp as I heard the sound of shattering plastic and metal screeching.  
I turned back to see Senji shot point blank.  
He didn't get back up.  
I sat on the edge of the seat, waiting for Senji to get back up.  
He couldn't lose. Not after all this time.  
But he was called off as the loser.  
I moved to leave the room, knowing the penalty followed.  
I tried to hit the remote as I left, but Kan grabbed it.  
"We need to see what he'll be leaving there like."  
I shook my head as I went to the kitchen.  
But nothing could stop me from hearing him scream in pain as Rei took something from him.  
The look on Shindo's face as he came into the kitchen was of horror.  
"What did she..." I started, unsure whether I wanted to know.  
"His fucking eye. She ripped out his right eye. No anesthetic, nothing."  
I covered my mouth and moved for the trashcan.  
I couldn't stop myself from throwing up and Shin held my hair back as I did. He really looked like he wanted to join me.  
I wiped my mouth and washed it out with water at the sink.  
He didn't stop me as I went upstairs again.  
How could they do that to him?  
All because that Ganta kid had cheated.  
He hadn't won honestly.  
I pulled his shirt on after stripping down and curled in bed.  
The tears fell and I cried myself to sleep thinking of the pain Senji was in.  
xXx  
Senji wasn't in another Carnival fight, but there were reports coming out of a group from inside blowing the place up to escape about two weeks ago.  
I had to wonder how many got out. Whether Senji was one.  
He hadn't come to see me if he had.  
I looked at where Loki sat beside me in the restaurant with Clara.  
He took the check and I stood up to leave.  
I just couldn't stand not knowing if Senji was alright.  
It made me sick.  
Worse than the last month of morning sickness.  
I walked out and breathed the fresh air.  
Loki came out as well and I watched Clara nod at him.  
I leaned against my brother.  
"You really miss him, don't you?" He asked.  
I nodded.  
I looked up at shouting.  
"You're the one who was supposed to watch her god dammit. All I asked was that you let me know how she was doing. You could have mentioned another man."  
I saw that familiar mess of hair and tan skin.  
I pushed away from Loki and hurried through the crowd keeping their distance from the fighting men.  
I had to push a few people to the side.  
When I pushed past the crowd, I didn't stop moving.  
I rushed to Senji and wrapped my arms around him.  
"God I missed you Senji." I buried my face in his shirt.  
He dropped Izzy to wrap his arm around me and I looked at his other shoulder.  
His arm had been amputated, shoddily.  
But he was alive.  
That was all that mattered.  
"You said you'd wait for me baby." Senji spoke quietly.  
"I have been. I knew you'd get out eventually."  
"Then..."  
"It's Loki. My brother."  
He looked up as my brother came closer to us as the crowd flowed away once the chances of a fight dwindled.  
"She said you were dead." Senji frowned at him.  
"She said you love her."  
Senji held me tight.  
"Yes." He leaned down to kiss me. "More than anything."  
Loki nodded.  
Senji sighed. "How's my baby?" He spoke softly as he put his hand on my hip.  
"Fine. Nothing unusual."  
"Fenix." Loki sounded almost annoyed. "My sister gets pregnant out of wedlock and doesn't tell me?" He looked at Senji. "You had better be the father."  
Senji nodded as he held me close.  
"Senji, I need to heal you." I said.  
"I'm fine. Just let me hold you dammit." He said. Clara pulled up beside us with her car.  
She rolled the window down.  
"Senji." She greeted.  
He faced her. "Thanks for taking care of her for me." He moved to open the back door and let me get in first.  
He glared at Izzy. "You can take care of yourself from now on."  
The man nodded. "I'm sorry. I thought I had told you already alright?"  
Senji scowled at him as Loki got in the front seat.  
"Not forgiven."  
He closed the door and I scooted close to him.  
I touched the bandaging.  
"This is going to hurt to repair." I said.  
I reached up to touch his cheek. "And this."  
Loki reached his hand back to pat my leg.  
"Don't worry Fe. You might be on my shit list right this moment, but between us both, we should be able to heal him up just fine."  
I nodded.  
I leaned against Senji, just soaking up his warmth and strength and scent.  
Clara made short work of the drive over to her house.  
"You should know..." I started.  
"Your team is still alive." Senji looked at Loki.  
"I saw them dead. In pieces."  
"And I saved them. Kan was a good friend of mine too. And I just had to help. I almost died bringing them back, but I managed it." Loki said as he got out.  
Senji got out and touched his shoulder.  
Loki faced him.  
"Thank you. Seriously. I always believed I had caused their deaths and their families hated me." Senji said.  
Clara laughed. "We couldn't hate you Senji. You're an idiot, but you're our idiot."  
I smiled as I stuck by his bad side.  
Kan opened the door and Senji looked at him.  
I stepped to the side as Kan came to wrap him in a hug.  
Senji hugged him back.  
"Damn, you're finally back with us." Kan said.  
"I guess. Until Makina needs my help."  
"Makina? The head of the guard for the other Blocks?" I asked.  
He nodded. "She helped lead the revolt that caused my freedom in exchange for my help too. Of course, I'm more than happy to help her in getting that hellhole wiped off the map." He said.  
Kan motioned for the house. "Come on, lets go in. Clara and Fenix can get dinner for you real quick."  
I nodded and Senji sighed.  
He was thinking about how he used to cook.  
And when Loki and I finished with him, he'd be just as good as before.  
Or better.  
Clara and I pulled some leftovers together and I listened to Kan talk to him.  
Senji must be feeling like I had when seeing Loki again.  
This was a man he thought dead for years. Not like my ten, but a long time.  
I carried the plate out and sat beside him on the couch.  
He sighed again as he had to have me hold the plate steady for him.  
"We'll have you back to normal in no time." I said.  
He nodded.  
He didn't eat much and I set the plate aside.  
"Sorry. I'm just...not hungry." He said. "All I could think about when Makina said I was free to leave was getting here to Fenix."  
I leaned into him and he wrapped his left arm around me.  
"No, you're fine." Clara said. "You're probably tired too. We can talk in the morning Senji. Go on and get some rest."  
He nodded.  
"Honestly, I am. I think I ran half the way to that restaurant." He said.  
I laughed. "That wouldn't surprise me." I said. I stood up to lead him upstairs.  
Loki came with us and Kan and Clara said goodnight downstairs.  
Senji sighed as I pushed open the door to the room I'd been in.  
"I don't like the thought of you two sleeping together, but obviously he does love you." Loki said.  
Senji nodded.  
I stayed to his bad side, protecting him subconsciously.  
Senji moved into the room and sat on the bed.  
He rubbed at his face.  
Loki moved to his bad side and looked at the bandaging.  
"Do you mind?" Loki asked.  
Senji shook his head. "It was a quick job, so it probably isn't good."  
I watched Loki start to undo the wrapping and sat beside Senji.  
I held his hand, playing with the ring on his thumb.  
I was just too happy to see him alive.  
Loki hissed at the sight of his arm.  
"What the hell cut you up?"  
"Another Deadman. The one who took over Mockingbird."  
"Toto?" I asked. "Is he alright?"  
"We...had to kill him. He and that girl he took a liking to are both dead now." Senji said. "I guess I kind of hoped we could save him, but there was nothing we could do."  
Loki nodded and used his pocket knife to cut his hand.  
"This will hurt a little. Regrowing bone is always harder."  
I held out my hand and he cut into my palm too.  
I mixed in my blood to help heal Senji.  
He gripped my other hand as I watched his arm reform.  
Loki was much stronger than I was.  
He'd brought people back from the dead.  
Senji's arm was almost fully healed in just minutes.  
He unclenched his hand on mine as the pain went down.  
I left my blood in him, willing it to heal his eye too.  
He winced and pulled away the patch.  
I watched his eye reform.  
Loki tested the strength in his arm.  
"Seems good enough to me. You'll heal up a bit more with Fenix looking after you." He pulled out a penlight and shined it in Senji's eye.  
"Fucking hell, warn first."  
"Sorry, at least you can see."  
"Just fine thanks. Bit fuzzy still, but clearing up nicely." Senji said.  
Loki nodded.  
"I'll approve of you. Since you do seem to love my sister and are having a child with her. But I expect you to be married before the birth." Loki said with narrowed eyes.  
"As soon as we can." Senji said. "I want to keep her with me for life."  
I smiled as he looked down at me.  
Loki nodded.  
"In that case, goodnight. Do not do anything to hurt her or I will kill you. Unlike Fenix, I learned that trick too."  
I frowned. I could kill with my gift?  
Senji sighed as he stood up again.  
He moved to pull his shirt off and I reached out.  
He didn't flinch as I touched his back.  
"I missed you so much." I said.  
I watched him groan as he rolled his shoulder.  
He sat back down and scooted back against the wall.  
He pulled me into his lap.  
"I really missed you being there. God those kids drove me crazy." He said.  
"I...I don't like that Ganta kid."  
Senji laughed. "Ganta is a good kid. He was just scared and a bit like you really. I don't blame him for my eye. I lost. He got the drop on me and I should have seen it coming. He'd barely even realized he had a Branch before they threw him into the fights. He kicked Minatsuki's ass too. That was funny."  
I frowned. "How is she?"  
"I heard she was getting transferred to a prison for women and her Branch is being kept sedated using some new technology. Unlike me, she doesn't have the ability to do supersonic actions, though she could learn I guess. Her brother is able to visit whenever he wants, so that'll hopefully help her."  
I nodded. She needed the stability.  
"What about Calvin and Larissa?"  
He grinned. "When they went free, they came back out here. Larissa said they'll set up their shop again and she still wants to make you a jacket. And make me a new one."  
I smiled as I shivered.  
He reached to pull the blanket up over me and leaned down a little to kiss me.  
"I'm never leaving you again." He said.  
"Good." I sighed.  
I closed my eyes as I laid my cheek against his chest.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**  
I woke up to him gone.  
I started to panic a little and yanked on my pants and shirt from yesterday that Senji had clearly taken off when he put me to bed last night.  
I hurried downstairs and stumbled at the bottom of the stairs.  
Kan caught me as he was walking past the stairs from the living room.  
"Morning." He said.  
I turned to head into the kitchen and sighed as I saw Senji standing at the stove with Clara.  
He laughed as he turned to face us.  
He carried the large plate he held over to the table and Clara moved to take another.  
Senji moved to stand beside me and leaned down to kiss me.  
In front of my brother, but I couldn't care.  
"Morning baby." He mumbled against my temple as he ruffled my still bed messed hair.  
He pulled out my chair and made sure I was comfortable before sitting beside me.  
"So what is your plan for today?" Kan asked him.  
"Well...I guess I'll need to look for a job."  
Kan looked at his wife.  
"Well...the team still wants you back, if you want to come back."  
Senji looked thoughtful for a moment as I gathered up some eggs and bacon he had been cooking.  
Clara handed me the bowl of grits when she was done getting some for herself.  
"I'm not sure I really should...I've done some pretty shitty things inside that place."  
Kan reached out to touch his hand.  
"We don't care Senji. You're still our brother. Maybe...you can work on commission as a specialist? The department is going to need someone with your skills now that the world at large is open to, what did they call you, Deadmen?" Kan said.  
Senji huffed as he filled his plate. "Last thing we need is Deadmen fighting outside the Carnival again. It was bad enough when I went after Goreless Peace last time without realizing that bastard was a Deadman."  
"But that was before there was anything on the police side to combat them. The prison was the only thing keeping them in check. We need you and Loki and anyone else who will join us. Someone is going to have to beat some sense into young brats who have some power and think they can use it to hurt people. Domon beat sense into you didn't he?"  
"Exactly, let him do it." Senji said.  
I put down my fork as I felt a little nauseous.  
Senji looked at me and reached to touch my back.  
"You alright baby?" He asked.  
I nodded.  
He looked back at Kan.  
"I don't want to put Fenix in danger either. Going after Deadmen is a life of danger. If they work together, it'll be just like the orphanage again. And I won't put her in that kind of risk." Senji said.  
I stood up and moved towards the bathroom.  
Senji started to follow me but I waved him off.  
I closed the door behind me and sat on the side of the tub, facing the toilet.  
He ignored me and came in anyway.  
"Baby? Was it something you ate?"  
"No, just hormones making me nauseous." I said.  
He knelt beside me.  
"Have you seen a real doctor since you got out?"  
I shook my head. "I'll be fine."  
"Please, just go for me then. I'll stay with you, but I want to make sure you and the baby are alright."  
I sighed and nodded.  
"She can see the doc that the team uses. He'll probably want to check you out anyway. He never did believe you were responsible for us." Kan said from the doorway.  
Senji sighed. "Is he still in the same hospital?"  
"Yeah. I'll call him and let him know you're coming in."  
"No, call him, but don't say it's me. I'm not sure if I want him to check me out yet."  
Kan nodded and headed back into the kitchen.  
Senji looked at me.  
"You feeling better?" He asked.  
I nodded and started to stand up.  
The nausea was gone.  
He walked me back out and got me settled in again.  
"You good Fe?" Loki asked.  
"Yeah." I nodded.  
"Are you going in?"  
I nodded.  
"Do you want me to come too?" He asked.  
"No. I'll be alright with Senji. You still have a lot of paperwork to fill out." I said.  
Clara sighed as she got up. I couldn't eat anymore, so Senji helped clear the table after putting my food away for me.  
Kan stood up and pulled on his uniform jacket.  
"The guys are coming over after work to see you." He said to Senji.  
I watched Senji look down at the counter.  
"Alright."  
"Clara will drive you guys today, so get some things done, alright?" Kan adjusted his tie.  
Senji nodded.  
xXx  
I sighed as we finally pulled into the hospital parking lot.  
Senji had been shocked at the fact that they hadn't touched his money. And apparently, the bank was having everything the prison owed everyone from inside transferred properly.  
So he wouldn't have to worry about money for a good while. Years in fact.  
If I budgeted right, neither of us had to think about work for at least a decade.  
I looked down at the phone I had gotten.  
Senji insisted that we get up to date phones now that we were out together.  
The screen showed a picture of him putting my brother in a headlock.  
I had gotten it when Loki had teased Senji about being such a pushover with me.  
Senji opened the door and I got out with him.  
We had dropped Loki off at the station after getting the phones and doing paperwork for the transfer of ownership of the account from Clara to Senji.  
Now it was just us.  
"Call me when you guys are done, I'm going to run over to the office and collect up some paperwork for Marcel about clearing your case."  
Senji nodded and we watched her drive off.  
He faced the hospital.  
I had never liked the places.  
Too much death and sickness.  
He put his arm around me and walked with me inside.  
The woman at the counter looked up at us as Senji stood in front of her.  
"Is Dr. Kurosawa free?"  
"You are?"  
"Senji Kiyomasa."  
"I'll see if he has a moment to see you. He did say he was clearing his schedule earlier, so he might not be in anymore." She said.  
Senji led me to the chairs beside the counter and sat me in one.  
He knelt in front of me.  
"Are you alright baby?"  
"I'm just scared. I hate hospitals." I said.  
"I know, I'm sorry. It's just easier than finding time for him to come out to the station." Senji said.  
I nodded.  
"Mister Kiyomasa."  
Senji stood up and moved back to the counter.  
"He said he'll be right out. Please wait a minute."  
Senji nodded and came back to me.  
I didn't need to see a doctor about my baby. My abilities gave me everything I needed.  
But if he wanted me to see a doctor, a real one, I would.  
Senji reached for my hand and I leaned into him as I twisted the blade ring on his thumb.  
The tiny blades were jammed permanently out on both rings, but I knew he'd always be careful with them.  
"Where are you going to get replacements?" I asked.  
"If the old man who made these is still at the shop, I'll see if Clara can swing by and we can get some better ones made for us both." He said.  
I smiled. Only a weird couple talked about getting bladed rings.  
I fiddled with the gold band on my finger and Senji ran his thumb over it.  
"Senji?"  
We looked up at an older man in a white coat and for a moment, all I could see was Rei.  
Senji rubbed my shoulder as he put his arm around me.  
"It's been a while." The man said.  
"Yeah."  
"Come on back to my office. I've got some tea waiting for us."  
Senji stood up and held his hand out to me.  
The soft look in the doctors eyes made me relax a little as I held Senji's hand.  
"So who is your young lady?"  
"My fiancee, Fenix."  
The doctor led us down a couple hallways and Senji walked past him into an office.  
He urged me to a couch and moved to pick up a frame from the desk.  
"How're the girls Roy?" Senji asked.  
"Teenagers. Different style every week, new boyfriends every month." The doctor moved to a electric pot and poured water into a few cups and set a couple tea balls aside.  
Senji put the frame back down and looked around the office like I was.  
It was homey. Dark wood bookcases filled with medical texts and a low shelf with kids books and toys. A plush couch to each side of the center of the room flanking a chest that doubled as a table. The desk was set back just a couple feet from the windows, but the pale blue curtains closed off the bright sun mostly.  
The doctor sat across from me.  
He held out his hand after setting the cups down.  
"I'm Roy Kurosawa, the resident doctor for the police team Senji works on."  
"Fenix Halure." I said as I took his hand briefly.  
Senji moved to sit beside me.  
"So are you free for good? Going back to the force?" Roy asked him.  
"I'm...free, but I'm not going back. I thought about something Kan said this morning and I've decided to be a consultant for the force, but not an active member. I'll take on cases where they need Deadman help."  
I sighed. I had figured he'd choose that. It was just in his nature to protect people.  
"Well, I suppose I can give you a physical checkup to make your records up to date with a public hospital, to help you out."  
"I...didn't come for me." He said.  
Roy frowned. "I wanted you to take Fenix on as a private patient."  
The doctor nodded. "I see. You know I'm not seeing any patients of my own outside the force right?"  
"Kan said that, but you're the only doctor I can trust to make sure she stays okay. She's got a gift as well, healing, but I still wanted an actual doctor to be looking out for her."  
I looked down at my tea as I picked it up. I hadn't eaten anything other than a couple bites of Senji's sandwich at lunch. I didn't want to throw up again.  
I sipped at the tea. It was soothing, sweet, yet surprisingly not a bit of leafy taste. I'd never liked tea before, but this was alright.  
Roy sighed. "I suppose I can make an exception for you two. It shouldn't be too hard to add you into my roster with the force."  
Senji sighed. "Thank you."  
"Now, lets get you checked out real quick while I have Miss Fenix fill out some paperwork for my records."  
He stood up to collect some folders from his desk and pulled a couple sheets from several.  
He brought them to me with a clipboard and a pen.  
"Just fill out what you can while I look Senji over, alright dear?"  
I nodded and took them as Senji stood up.  
He moved to the clearing of space between the couches and desk.  
The office was much bigger than I'd expected of a doctor to have.  
I filled in my basic information as Roy started to go over Senji.  
I looked up when Senji took his shirt off.  
"What happened to the scar?" Roy asked.  
Senji motioned at me. "She healed it unintentionally."  
The scratches on his back had long since faded away and I actually paused as I missed seeing them.  
I'd been so embarrassed about causing him pain, but now, I kind of missed having some marks to show that he was mine.  
I looked back down at my papers as Roy made notes on a separate paper.  
"Alright. You're good. I'll update your records in my computer."  
"Also, while I was in there, I had my eye torn out and my arm cut off." Senji sat beside me as he buttoned his shirt back up.  
Roy frowned as I set down the papers.  
"But..."  
"My brother and I healed him again." I said.  
"Interesting." Roy wrote down on the paper again. He looked back up at Senji. "And you can still do those blades?"  
"Yeah." He said.  
Roy scribbled again and the reached for my clipboard.  
He scanned through the sheets quickly.  
"So, do you want a physical as well while I put in a request for my daughter to see you?" Roy asked. "She works with women during pregnancy. It might be easier for you to talk with her about that?"  
I nodded.  
"I'll see if she has a minute."  
He got up to go to his cellphone.  
"Alright, come on over here." He said.  
I stood up and Senji turned on the couch to watch me.  
Roy had me doing some basic maneuvers, testing my limits as he scribbled on his notebook.  
He took my vitals and wrote them down as well.  
"Any bodily injuries or scars?"  
I shook my head. "I self heal."  
He nodded and wrote down more notes.  
His phone beeped at him and he looked at it.  
"Kari is going to come talk to you, so it'll be a couple minutes, alright?" He asked.  
I nodded and moved back to sit again.  
Senji pulled me close.  
"You do seem a lot happier now." Roy said to him.  
"I am. Fenix makes me very happy." Senji grinned.  
"You know the team doesn't hold you responsible right?"  
Senji nodded. "Kan said that a couple times now. But I still feel like it was my fault. Even though I got my revenge, thinking they were dead, I still feel guilty over it."  
Roy scoffed. "You can't change the past Senji. Those men are still alive and it wasn't your fault."  
I leaned into Senji and he relaxed.  
"I know, but still, it's just the thought that if I had been there, none of that would have happened."  
"And you wouldn't be sitting here now with a pretty woman at your side carrying your baby either."  
Senji paused before letting out a laugh. "Yeah."  
"The boy I knew couldn't even form words when my daughter helped me with the physicals at the station. You definitely wouldn't have gotten over that enough to talk to a beautiful young woman like Fenix here."  
Senji rubbed at his neck with his left hand as his right played with my hair.  
There was a knock on the door and Roy got up to open it.  
I watched a woman step inside.  
Senji looked away from her.  
"So it is true? Good old Senji came back."  
She laughed.  
"Not exactly." Senji mumbled.  
I realized his issue.  
Her shirt was slightly revealing with how low it was cut and the skirt showed off her legs.  
It was the one thing that killed him.  
She moved to sit on the couch across from me and finished off her father's mostly full cup of tea.  
"So you are Fenix?" She asked. "You are friends with this big softie?"  
I laughed.  
"Senji is my fiancee." I said.  
"Wow, better late than never I guess, eh Senji?" She teased him.  
He flipped her off.  
"You wished." She laughed.  
He turned away and I reached for his hand.  
He kept his shoulder to me, but let me hold his hand.  
Kari sighed. "Guess I'll have to stop teasing him eventually."  
She looked at me. "Don't worry, I'm not being mean to him, it was just a running joke in the station about how flustered he'd get whenever they had to deal with almost any woman. Older was always easier for him."  
I nodded. I didn't sense any ill will from her.  
"Now, you're worried about your pregnancy?" She asked.  
"I think I'm fine, but Senji wanted to get a professional check."  
"He's right in that. I guess he's the father?"  
I nodded.  
"Way to go, you can't do much better than him when it comes to good looks and his caring personality with kids."  
Senji squeezed my hand and I caught the slight flush at the back of his neck before he rubbed it away.  
"I know. He is very sweet and has always taken care of me since we met in that place."  
"You were in the prison with him?" She frowned.  
"I...can heal using my blood, like he makes the scythes from his. And someone betrayed me out of fear and turned me in."  
"Well damn, that sucks. You'd probably make a great doctor." She said.  
"Anyway, I ended up meeting him when he rescued me from someone else and we've been together ever since." I said.  
She smiled. "Love at first sight?"  
I nodded.  
"She's modest and nice to me." Senji muttered.  
"Well damn, if I had known that was all it took to win you over I could have done that a long time ago." Kari said.  
I laughed. She was entertaining.  
"So, I can get an ultrasound done today, shouldn't take long, and if you want some medication for the nausea, I can prescribe it to you." She said.  
"I can't take medications." I said.  
"Her blood removes it took quickly." Senji said.  
"Ah, damn. That must suck if you get hurt." She said.  
I nodded. "I just try not to."  
"Well, lets get the ultrasound done and hopefully that'll relieve Senji a bit."  
I nodded.  
She stood up and motioned for me to follow her.  
I started to get up and tugged on his hand.  
Senji got up and stayed at my side.  
"Normally I take care of women from rape and other trauma, so the wing I'm in charge of is pretty leery of men in general." She said.  
I nodded.  
But I didn't let go of his hand.  
She led us through a set of double doors that needed a swipe with a card.  
The gathering area had several women, some with fresh bruises.  
They looked warily at Senji as he wrapped his arm around my waist.  
Kari led us back into a private room with a bed.  
"Go ahead and lay down while I collect some things." She said. She pointed at Senji. "Stay."  
He gave her a blank look as she opened the door.  
"Like I'd leave her here with your psycho ass." He called after her.  
She laughed.  
I smiled as I sat on the uncomfortable bed.  
I reached for his hand as he sat in the chair by the bed.  
He pulled my hand towards him and kissed the back of my hand.  
I saw a woman at the doorway.  
I smiled at her.  
"You aren't afraid?" She sounded terrified.  
"Of Senji? No. He's one of the good guys. He was a cop." I said.  
She looked at him.  
He frowned at the fresh bruising on her cheek and arms.  
Her short sleeves didn't seem to bother him.  
She stepped forward as she pulled out a cellphone.  
She held it up after scrolling quickly through her pictures.  
She showed it to Senji.  
"Can you have the police find him? He...left me here after my boyfriend beat me. I...wanted to thank him."  
Senji pulled out his own phone and took a picture of her picture.  
"I'll see if my old team can track him down. If they can find him, I'll call Dr. Kari and have him sent over, alright?" He looked up at her.  
She nodded.  
She hurried away and Kari came back.  
"Marie is one of my newer patients."  
"She asked me to find the person who brought her here." Senji said.  
"Yeah, we tried to get info on him from the cameras but he just kind of dumped her and left. At first we thought he had beaten her, but she insisted it was her boyfriend."  
She closed the door.  
I looked up at her.  
"Alright, this stuff is a bit cold, so bear with me."  
I nodded and laid back.  
She pushed my shirt up and I jolted at the cold gel on my stomach.  
It was a minute before she ran the scanner over my stomach while staring at the monitor.  
"Everything looks good to me. I'll get the images sent over to my father to put in your file and I want you to come in again in another couple months, alright?" She asked.  
I sat up and wiped at the gel with the towel she handed me.  
"Can you tell how the baby is?" Senji asked.  
"Forming quite well, I'm going to start up the bet that it'll be a boy." She said as I pulled my shirt down.  
Senji helped me off the bed and she started to lead us back to Roy's office.  
I felt Senji tense at the sight of the man outside the office talking to the doctor.  
"No, I cannot give out patient information." Roy said.  
"No problem, the man of the hour is here."  
The younger man turned and I saw him fully.  
Ruffled blond hair and sharp blue eyes on an American looking face.  
Nothing like Senji.  
Even his build was sleight.  
Senji moved to put me mostly behind him.  
"Long time no see Senji."  
"Lucas." Senji said curtly.  
"I heard you got out and figured you'd swing by your old places. Your teammate said you were at the hospital, so I came by."  
"And now you've seen me." Senji said.  
"Dude, no need to get all bent out of shape. I'm clean now, nothing to worry about."  
"Except the fact that you are a very shitty human being." Senji moved to take me back into Roy's office.  
"So when did you get a girl?" Lucas asked.  
Senji urged me inside and Kari closed the door behind him, leaving him to deal with whoever that was.  
I stood by the door.  
"Come on, just take a second to set up another appointment and then you can go defend him." Kari said.  
I nodded and she pulled out her phone.  
She used it to set up another appointment two months from now.  
I headed for the door and pulled it open.  
Senji turned to look at me.  
"Are you done?"  
I nodded.  
"Seriously though, you were always such a hardass in school, how did you end up with a pretty girl?" Lucas asked.  
Senji held out his hand to me.  
"Wait, is this one of those victims you're always taking care of?"  
"Just leave, if you know what is good for you. I'm not lending you money, I won't put you up, and I don't know any woman I'd hate enough to hook you up with." Senji said.  
He moved to lead me back down the halls.  
Roy closed his office door and I glanced back to see Kari wave before walking with her father.  
Lucas came up on my other side.  
"So how did you meet Senji?" He asked.  
"In prison." I said.  
"Were you a visitor to your brother and just fell in love with this jackass?"  
"I was put in prison by lies and Senji kept me safe."  
He laughed as Senji put his arm around my waist.  
"So you're telling me the cop killer actually protected someone?"  
Senji stopped as I lashed out.  
Lucas didn't see it coming.  
My ring cut his cheek as I slapped him, hard.  
"Senji never killed anyone and if you think he would ever hurt his friends, then you had better pack up and never show your face around him again. Or me." I shouted at him.  
He looked completely stunned as he stood there with his cheek bleeding.  
Senji pulled me close.  
"My friends are very much alive and still stand by my innocence in that case." Senji said. "And my lovely little fiancee here can rip you to shreds if you piss her off bad enough. I might be a bit of a monster from the quake, but she is worse when it comes to protecting her loved ones."  
I gripped Senji's shirt as he led me away from Lucas.  
"I texted Clara already." Senji said. "She'll be here shortly."  
I nodded.  
I was ready to just go back to someplace quiet.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**  
Dinner was fantastic as Senji laid it out on the backyard table.  
I sat on the bench with Loki as he rubbed at his temples.  
My brother and Kan had just gotten home shortly after Senji started the grill.  
"I never thought I'd actually miss having Senji's cooking, but damn I do." Domon said from the fire pit.  
Senji flushed slightly.  
His crew had welcomed him with open arms and I watched how he relaxed.  
He was genuinely happy to see them again. Alive.  
They took his decision with support.  
Shindo sat beside me on the bench.  
"We're glad you brought him home." He said as he adjusted his glasses.  
"Me too." I looked up at Senji.  
He still reached to rub over his right eye occasionally, but he had gotten used to having both arms again quickly.  
Momoi and Domon came to sit at the table as Kan pulled up some extra chairs.  
Clara brought out the cold dishes we'd made up earlier and Shindo stood to help her set them out.  
Senji jumped to take his lost space beside me.  
I leaned against him as everyone settled in around the table.  
"I never thought I'd ever eat with you guys again." Senji said.  
"When I asked for that cigarette, I really thought it would be my last." Domon said.  
"You're still smoking?"  
"Not so much anymore. Loki gives me a hard time for it."  
"Damn straight, if I have to heal your ass one more time to keep you from getting lung cancer, it might just make me quit." My brother said.  
Senji pulled the best steak from the pile and put it on my plate.  
I reached for the bread he had laid on the grill to toast and Loki passed me the bowl of potato salad.  
Everyone spent a minute collecting food.  
"So no one got married while I was gone?" Senji asked.  
Kan patted Momoi on the back.  
"He got a girlfriend, but they haven't given us a date yet."  
"I'm working slow with her alright."  
"Slow is right. You've been going out for months." Shindo teased.  
"And what about you? Your girlfriend hasn't exactly come around to meet the gang." Momoi retorted.  
The big guy had some bite when he wanted.  
Shin laughed.  
"Yeah..." He sobered up quick. Kan looked worried.  
"Something going wrong?" Senji asked.  
"It's nothing really. Just...I guess you'd understand her better than others. We just kind of hit it off after I caught her playing vigilante." Shindo said.  
I frowned.  
Senji sighed. "She's a Deadman, isn't she?"  
"She does this weird thing with tiny ropes of her blood. Like razor-wire I swear." He said. "I caught her doing it that night and she just panicked. I guess no one had seen her practicing before. Took an hour to catch her on foot."  
"But you did." Kan said.  
"Yeah. I caught up to her and she almost took my arm off with that shit. When I didn't flinch, she stopped and questioned why. I said my teammate had a skill like that and she was honestly interested in how I was friends with one 'of her kind.' I didn't really know how to put it except that being around you Senji was when I felt strongest."  
Senji grinned.  
"So why haven't you brought her to the gatherings?" Kan asked. "You know we wouldn't judge her based on that."  
"Well...she just fears cops. Myself excluded of course."  
"I get that." I nodded. Senji frowned at me. "Before I met Senji in there, I did fear cops. I thought if I got caught, I'd get thrown in prison for being a freak."  
"Maybe...you could meet her first?" Shindo asked me.  
I nodded. "If it's just me and Senji and you, she shouldn't be so afraid."  
"Tomorrow?" He asked. "We're off tomorrow."  
Senji nodded. "Sure. I thought about fixing up my parents old place." He changed the topic.  
I ate small bits of my food, starting to feel nauseous again.  
The steak seemed to be settling alright though, so I kept eating bits of it.  
It was soft and juicy. Much better than the stuff he had gotten in the prison for our dinners.  
He really was a great cook.  
Unlike me.  
"Good, it shouldn't be too bad off. The foundation was always good and solid, the walls might have some holes, but we can fix that up." Domon said.  
Senji nodded. "I'll probably put a new roof on too. Maybe even jack it up a floor if I can. Get a couple more rooms on it."  
Kan nodded at that. "Shouldn't be too hard to redo if we get some of the guys from the other squads in on this."  
Senji looked down.  
"Will they want to? I mean, for me?"  
"What are you talking about Senji? No one ever blamed you for our screwup. Hell, when they took you away for it, everyone else apparently rioted at the station while we were healing. But the boss said there was nothing we could do. Despite being alive to prove your murder charge false. It was rigged." Momoi said.  
Senji huffed. "Just like with Ganta. Poor kid got blamed for the Wretched Egg getting free and killing his whole class. He survived by being buried under bodies."  
I swallowed. And I had been wanting to hate the kid for Senji's injuries.  
"We'll ask at the station meeting and see how many want to help. Your old place could use a new roof and if you're tearing it off, might as well make another floor." Domon said.  
I slid from the bench and Senji looked at me.  
"You alright baby?" He asked.  
"I'm fine, just a little nauseous." I said.  
He started to get up.  
I stood off to the side and he came to hold me.  
"You have any medication for it?" Kan asked.  
I shook my head.  
"It doesn't work on us." Loki said. "Our healing blood prevents it."  
"Right." Momoi sighed. "Anything we can do?"  
"No, really, I'm fine. Senji just worries."  
"Like a hen." Kan teased him. Senji flipped him off.  
It made them all laugh and I smiled as I heard Clara hit her husband.  
"Be nice. Senji finally found some he really loves. Don't you fools ruin it."  
Senji laughed.  
"Don't worry Clara, no one is going to separate me and Fenix." He said.  
I leaned into him.  
"I'm going upstairs." I said.  
He nodded. "I'll be up shortly." He said as I moved away.  
I saw them all get up to clear the table.  
I walked through the back door into the kitchen and headed for the stairs.  
Their laughter carried up to me as I went upstairs. Senji had taken me shopping again and I sifted through the bags to pull tags from my new clothes. Skirts and shirts for loose comfort but still modest coverage.  
Senji liked the way the light fabrics had settled on me and I found quite a few skirts in different patters and colors to go with the tops that ranged from every color on the pale rainbow in whimsical patterns to darker colors for more sedated wear.  
He even found me a nice flowing dress.  
He called it just a few things until Larissa called him.  
I felt better as I looked at the discount stickers on almost every tag. Out of season clothing was the best. But he did make sure I got a long coat for colder days. And a couple sweaters and heavier skirts.  
I threw all the clothes into the basket by the door and started in on the jeans he'd bought for himself and the tanks and over shirts he'd picked out.  
He pushed the door open as I dropped everything in the basket and stuffed it down.  
He frowned at me.  
"I'll do laundry tomorrow so we can actually wear this stuff."  
He nodded.  
"Come on baby, lets go get a shower."  
I sighed as I nodded.  
It was the first time in a long time I was able to take a shower with Senji.  
He grabbed the faded sweats Kan had given him and I pulled out the uniform shirt and clean undies.  
Senji pulled the door open and headed down the hallway.  
I followed after closing our door.  
He set his towel and pants on the counter as I came into the bathroom.  
This shower wasn't quite like the bigger one from his prison room.  
Oddly enough, the rooms at the prison hadn't been bad. Slightly small, but good.  
I put my stuff on the counter as he started the water to heat up.  
He stripped quickly and I pulled my clothes off a little slower.  
"I did miss this." He said.  
I nodded as I stepped under the warm water.  
He followed me in, closing the curtain behind him.  
I looked up at him with a smile.  
"What would Loki think if he knew you proposed to me in the shower?" I laughed.  
Senji laughed.  
"He might just try to kill me. But I don't care. You're worth it." He leaned down to kiss me.  
His fingers brushed through my hair, completely soaking it.  
I pulled away as he reached for the shampoo.  
"Can I?" He asked.  
I nodded. "Spoil me."  
He grinned. "All the time."  
I smiled and closed my eyes as he ran his fingers through my hair with the soap.  
He used his hands and the body wash to clean me.  
He left kisses all over my skin as the soap ran off under the water.  
"I am never going to get enough of you." He said as he knelt in front of me.  
It felt kind of empowering to have such a strong, loving man seem to worship me.  
I loved him so much it hurt when I had left him behind.  
He stood up and kissed me again.  
"I love you Senji." I said.  
He grinned.  
"I love you too Fenix."  
He urged me out of the shower to dry off and I watched through the gap as he quickly washed himself and then shut the water off.  
He shook his head like a dog and got most of the water from his hair.  
It wasn't quite black when dry, with faint hints of dark brown, but wet, no one could tell.  
I watched him pull the curtain open as I pulled his shirt on.  
"Now that is sexy." He said.  
I blushed as I reached for my panties.  
He snatched them from my hand.  
"No way. Just like that, sleep with me."  
I flushed darker.  
"Senji!"  
He grinned as he pulled his pants on and let them hang on his lean hips.  
"It isn't like I haven't seen it all." He moved in behind me as I hung my towel up to dry out. "Touched it all." He leaned down to kiss my neck.  
I shivered.  
His playful mood was hot.  
He put his towel up and herded me towards the door.  
"I can't go out there like this." I hissed. "Your boss is out there."  
"Ex-boss. And I'm pretty damn sure Domon doesn't care. No one will even see you." He said.  
I watched him stuff my panties in his pocket.  
I hid behind him as he opened the door.  
I shut the light off and he quickly moved to our door.  
I followed behind him, slipping into our room as I heard someone coming into the kitchen downstairs.  
He locked the door behind me and I moved for the bed.  
"That was mean." I said.  
Senji grinned at me.  
"You know you like it." He teased me.  
I glared at him.  
He moved to lay behind me.  
"You just seemed so quiet today." He said.  
I looked down at the floor.  
"Sorry, I just...I woke up and you weren't here...I thought it was a dream, finding you again. And going to the hospital is just so unlike me, but with you, I feel braver."  
He reached to pull me close.  
"I'm sorry baby. If you want me to stay in bed until you get up, I can." He said. "I've got no complaints with holding my woman."  
I blushed again.  
"No. I just...I felt scared because of everything that we've been through and hormones and I just didn't want to finally be going crazy after getting my brother back and all your friends."  
He pulled me to straddle him and tossed the blanket over us as I laid over his chest.  
"I'll stay with you. Don't ever forget that. I promised to stay with you forever. Just because we haven't gotten married yet doesn't mean I'm not going to keep that promise."  
I nodded.  
"If you get scared that I'm gone, just call me. I set my number on your quick calls. Along with everyone on the crew and Clara. And Loki is right after me. We'll all answer our phones." He said.  
"How come you adjusted to being here so easily?" I asked. "I'm still not really settled after two months."  
"Easy, I knew you were here waiting for me. And I know you'll always be here when I go to bed. And when I get up, you're the first thing I see."  
I moved to kiss him.  
"I'll wake you up if I get out of bed before you're ready to get up. I'll never let you wonder where I am and how I'm doing again." He said.  
I nodded.  
He wrapped his arms around me and eased me down onto him.  
I gasped. "Senji, should we..."  
"I texted Kari. She said it was fine as long as I'm not rough. And I have no intentions of being rough." He grinned.  
He guided me on him.  
He was gentle as he moved slowly.  
It was different from before, but somehow still hot.  
I looked down at him as he brushed his hands on my thighs.  
It felt so good to have him touch me again.  
He stroked me and I dug my nails into his shoulders.  
He groaned at the tiny pricks of pain.  
"Senji." I moaned his name as I stared down at him.  
He growled my name as he came.  
I collapsed on him and he ran his fingers through my hair.  
"We can do it as long as we want up until about seven months." He said. "And I've got time to make up for."  
I blushed as I closed my eyes.  
"You're horrible." I mumbled. "I love you."  
"I love you too baby."  
xXx  
It was almost lunch when Shindo texted Senji about meeting his girlfriend.  
We decided on a low public restaurant and Senji borrowed Kan's car.  
I was surprised at how well he could drive for having been in prison for years.  
I got out when he parked in the lot and he looked at me ver the car. "You know...my license expired two years ago right?"  
"Senji!" I frowned at him.  
He just laughed and moved around the car to meet me as we headed for the doors. "You need to get it renewed."  
"I know, I know. I'll do it after lunch." He said.  
I sighed as he opened the door.  
Shindo got up from the booth and waved us over.  
I moved to sit as he sat back down.  
"Guys, this is Karina." He motioned to a pretty younger girl. She must have been barely scratching legal age. Maybe nineteen.  
Her short black hair framed her oval face and curled in an adorable way. Her frame was tiny and she looked like she had only recently been putting on proper weight.  
Since meeting Shindo?  
I know I hadn't eaten well until Senji fed me in prison.  
She looked down at the table.  
"So...you're a cop?" She asked Senji.  
"Sort of. I was a cop." He said. She looked up. "Some stuff happened and I ended up going into Deadman Wonderland a few years ago."  
"For their supposed murder." She nodded. "Shin told me about that."  
"Yeah, but I made it through pretty well."  
"And...you're also a Deadman? Like me?" She frowned.  
Senji cut his palm on his ring and made the small blade he had once chopped my hand off with.  
She seemed to relax a bit more.  
I felt nervous when she looked at me with those piercing blue eyes.  
"And you?" She frowned.  
"I'm...different. I'm a Deadman too I guess, but my initial skill was just healing."  
"Was?" She tilted her head.  
"I picked up the ability to copy other Deadmen by just touching them."  
She pulled away slightly.  
"You can both heal and copy?"  
I nodded. "I don't really fight unless I need to, and I hate using the skills I took from everyone in the prison, but I have them."  
"Shin said...you hated cops."  
"I did. Before I met Senji, I feared cops. But then he told me about his team. How they accepted him. They've been really nice to me, taking care of me until Senji got free during that breakdown."  
"So...Shindo isn't the only weird cop?"  
I laughed. "No, there is at least a whole station of them. And my brother and several from his old station."  
"Your brother is a cop?" She frowned.  
"It's...a long story. I'll have to have him help me tell you. I guess we can laugh at it now, but it wasn't all that funny at the time." I said.  
The waitress came over to pass out glasses of water and menus. "Sorry about the wait. Lunch rush gets a little crazy."  
Shindo waved her apology off. "A lemonade with rum for her and a shot of whisky for me."  
She wrote it down quickly. She looked at Senji.  
"I'll get a bottle of Sour and a glass of root beer." She wrote it down, but didn't look at me. "And regular lemonade for her please, nothing in it."  
He had to stress the nothing in it.  
I realized why when she walked off and I looked at the menu.  
The drinks almost all had alcohol.  
"Is the food safe?" I whispered to Senji.  
He glanced at the menu. "Mostly. Just avoid the rightmost flap."  
I nodded.  
"You don't drink?" Karina asked.  
"I'm pregnant."  
She glanced at Senji.  
I nodded. "We're expecting about February."  
"So Kari checked her out?" Shindo asked.  
"Yeah, said she was good to go. That I was worried over nothing." Senji said.  
I looked at the menu.  
"She just hasn't eaten much other than the barbecue last night. Clara told me she hasn't eaten much until I came back, so I wanted to make sure."  
I felt bad, but I just couldn't eat.  
Not because I didn't like his cooking. I loved it.  
Shindo nodded. "Well, these guys aren't as good as Senji, but they do make a pretty good prime rib."  
I nodded.  
"True. If nothing changed while I was gone, they do. I taught the cook back before that shit happened."  
I looked up at Senji.  
"Yes, I taught the cook how to properly cook a steak." He said. "He burnt mine and he was new, so I went back and taught him and the older cook."  
Shindo laughed. "That was a weird night. Senji ended up in an apron until closing teaching them both."  
Senji grinned.  
Maybe he should find work as a cook. He seemed to like it.  
I shook my head at myself. No, cooks rarely enjoyed cooking off work. And I wanted his cooking for myself.  
Consulting and contracting with the local police forces would be better for him. Especially with me to heal him when he came home.  
The waitress brought our drinks and took our orders.  
I looked at Senji as he poured the bottle into the glass and mixed it with the straw.  
It kind of made me wish I could drink even when not pregnant. But as his secret stash had proven, my blood didn't like it.  
He drank some of it and held it out to me.  
I frowned.  
"Just a sip will be fine with your blood." He said.  
I nodded.  
I held the glass carefully and took a tiny sip.  
It was bitter yet sweet from the soda.  
I wrinkled my nose as I held it back to him.  
He laughed. "I'll find you something one of these days."  
"I think I'll stick with my lemonade." I said.  
I went to drink it until Senji pulled it away.  
He tasted it.  
"Dammit." He set it to the side.  
"What?"  
"Vodka." He grumbled. "This place is infamous for the drinks, but I thought there might be something you could have."  
Shindo sighed. "Right, they make the lemonade with vodka." Karina laughed.  
"Man you guys are killer. You know one drink won't kill her. Not if she's a healer."  
Senji shook his head. "I'm not worried about her, I just know the damage drinking causes on unborn babies. One of the kids from the old orphanage I looked out for and spent time in was abandoned because he had brain damage from his mother drinking while carrying him."  
I sighed as he flagged the girl down again.  
"Can I get a plain glass of root beer? She can't have alcohol for a while."  
The girl lit up. "Oh god I'm sorry. I thought maybe she was just new to the drinking scene. I'll get right on it. Back in a second."  
She took the empty bottle from Senji's drink with her.  
I looked at the table.  
"Don't look so bad Fenix, I was the one who forgot you were pregnant and chose this place." Shindo said.  
"I'm not, it's just..."  
"You guys are making a deal over it. I'm sure she would have been fine with just water too." Karina said.  
I looked at her a little gratefully. She got it.  
Senji put his hand on my thigh.  
"We'll come back when you can drink again, alright?"  
I nodded.  
"I'll try to think of something you'll like by then."  
I put my hand over his and carefully brushed my thumb along the messed up blades of his right ring.  
It had been screwed up when his arm got taken off by Hagire using Toto.  
Poor Toto.  
The boy probably didn't get buried with his sister either.  
I looked up as the girl came back with a glass of root beer.  
"Absolutely plain." She promised.  
I nodded with a small thanks.  
"So...Shindo said you're forming a contract group of Deadmen to support the police." Karina said.  
"Well, just me really, but I've got a couple others in mind who might join if I send out to them." He looked down at me. "Karako, Game Fowl, probably would and Makina can get a hold of her. Ganta could probably use the distraction since Shiro is comatose still. Calvin can still copy without Larissa as long as he works at it and I don't mind him getting my skill."  
"Ganta?" I frowned.  
"I know, you don't like how he won, but he's just a kid who still has to grow up a bit." Senji said.  
"I'd...join." Karina said.  
Senji nodded. "Shindo said you've got a pretty good skill. Reminds me a bit of Hummingbird."  
I scoffed. "But she isn't a psychotic teenage bitch." I mumbled.  
Senji laughed. "True. I'd be glad to take you on the crew. Then you can help Shin, but not actually join the police. Plus, you'd get paid."  
"Domon is working up the proper formatting for a contract and I heard Clara was getting together the paperwork for you to get it set up." Shindo said.  
Senji nodded. "I guess I should definitely put full effort into this. I'll get a hold of Makina and see about getting Karako and the ones that got out the first time."  
The girl came back with a tray and passed out all our meals.  
I looked at the steak I had ordered.  
It was so much bigger than the tiny perfection Senji had made me last night.  
"It's alright if you don't finish it. Kan or I will eat it later." Senji said.  
I nodded.  
I cut into it carefully.  
Senji and Shindo and Karina talked about the company he was going to set up for Deadmen to get back into the world as good guys too. Not just the criminals they were portrayed as. We.  
I had to remind myself that as much as I ignored my gifts most times, I was still one of them.  
One of the good guys mistaken as a criminal.  
Like Senji had been.  
Like Ganta.  
But...I was a criminal.  
I might not have intended it, but I buried my brother alive.  
That counted as a crime, right?  
Even if he forgave me?  
I took another bite of steak.  
What kind of mother was I going to be?  
It was strange to think Senji's colorful past was less criminal than my very empty one.  
In all his years, he hadn't done anything serious. Until he met me.  
Then he murdered. Several people. In defense technically, but was it really when he knew he could kill them?  
I just hid the fact that I buried my brother and tried to get by with healing people when they came to me.  
Senji was moving on, but I was still adjusting to not living in hiding from everything.  
He was getting over his past.  
I kept looking back at mine.  
Were the memories worth it?  
I looked back on the few good memories I'd made with the older couple.  
No. Not with all the hiding I'd done.  
Living in secret.  
Senji had run wild with his skills, the violent kind.  
But I had feared getting caught so badly that I didn't save the people I could have.  
Loki would be disappointed in me. As would that older couple.  
I had to let go and move on and focus on saving people now. Helping Senji's team and the police.  
If nothing else, then to have my child one day say, I did something useful.  
I saved lives.  
"Fenix?" I looked up at Karina.  
She reached across the table to touch my hand.  
"Are you alright?" She asked.  
I felt Senji's arm around me.  
I looked at him.  
"You're crying baby." He said.  
I reached to wipe at my eyes.  
"Sorry, I'm fine." I said.  
Senji leaned slightly to kiss my temple.  
"What were you dozed off in?" He asked.  
"It's nothing." I shook my head. "I just realized some stuff that I was holding on to aren't important anymore."  
"Ah." He nodded.  
He called the girl over to get the rest of my mostly untouched meal boxed up and to get the check.  
Shindo fought over it with him until Senji handed it back with his card.  
"Just get the steak for the next gathering." Senji grinned. "And don't be stingy."  
Shindo frowned.  
"And bring her next time too. We're having something at Kan's next weekend."  
Shindo titled his head in confusion for a moment.  
"Oh shit, your birthday, I almost forgot it is September tomorrow."  
Senji nodded. "We're just doing a regular gathering. I don't want anything big. Clara said she'd pick the rest of the food out as long as I cooked the steak again."  
"You do cook quite well." I said.  
What the hell was I going to get him?  
I had completely forgotten it too. How horrible was I?  
xXx  
The house was in worse shape than we'd thought.  
It took the entire crew several days now to remove the roof and start the remodeling.  
I looked at Senji as he and Momoi were holding up some framing for the second floor rooms.  
A couple friends Domon had called up were professionals in this business and they were leading the project with some input from Senji.  
They had decided to gut the entire house once we realized how bad the vandalism had been.  
Smashed windows and graffiti wouldn't have bothered either of us.  
But they had even taken the wires out of the walls.  
Nothing had been spared. Anything of value had been stolen, except for a small box deep in the crawlspace.  
Senji had pulled it out and sighed over it.  
He put it away in Clara's car since we'd borrowed it until Senji figured out what he really wanted to drive.  
He kept saying motorcycles but I was a little afraid of them.  
I sat on the stone bench in the front yard that had miraculously remained in place.  
But it shouldn't have been a surprise since it was so damn heavy.  
I sighed as I looked at my phone.  
What was I going to get Senji?  
I needed to find something before tomorrow.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**  
Clara saved me.  
All day I had tried to find something Senji would like, but nothing special really popped out at me.  
She led me into the store as it opened and I looked around at everything.  
"Fenix." She called.  
I turned to face the main counter.  
An older man stood there with her.  
I walked over, trying to ignore all the beautiful things around me.  
Knives and swords and other various dangerous weapons were decorated beautifully, but not hiding that they were still deadly.  
"You're looking for something really specific?" He asked.  
"Yes." I nodded. "You know Senji Kiyomasa, right? You made his rings?"  
He nodded. "That boy is one of my different customers yes."  
"Do you...have any of those rings?" I asked.  
He frowned. "Two, fit for him. He called the other day to see if I could make some up and hasn't called back since."  
"He's been a bit busy. Do you have them ready?" I asked.  
He nodded. I watched him glance at my hands as I put them on the counter.  
He reached out to touch the rings on my thumbs.  
"So you are the one Senji ordered those for?"  
I nodded.  
He moved to a shelf behind the counter and pulled down a small box.  
"I was a bit confused why he wanted smaller ones, but it does make sense."  
He opened it and showed the two bladed rings, unbroken.  
"Is he getting some for someone else too?"  
I shook my head. "Some stuff happened and his got damaged. The one on his right hand won't fully retract or extend anymore and I've seen his left one catching a little too."  
He nodded. "If they get damaged they don't really function well."  
I picked up the two rings and flicked the blades out to test them before putting them back in the small box.  
Clara frowned.  
"You both cut yourselves with those?"  
"They are designed to shed blood away, but for Deadmen that isn't a problem anyway." The older man said.  
I nodded. "An open cut is required to use our skills."  
"Even yours?" She asked. I nodded.  
"Seems stupid, doesn't it? I hurt myself so someone else doesn't." I pulled out the card I had for Senji's account.  
"You're taking these from him?"  
"More like...for him. I think he forgot about them honestly, since he's been working hard on his project. So I wanted to surprise him for his birthday."  
The man nodded. "Senji is an odd man. He would definitely like these."  
I nodded as he swiped the card and the computer processed it.  
He handed it back with my receipt.  
He held the small ring box again and I accepted it.  
"Yours still function well?" He asked.  
I nodded. I flicked the blades out and then retracted them again.  
"Good, you come see me if they break." He said. "If you ever want anything else, I'll be happy to design you something better."  
"Thanks." I smiled.  
I started to follow Clara back out to her car.  
I stopped as I saw a boy leaning against her car.  
He looked up and I felt a little tense.  
Ganta.  
"Are you...Phoenix?" He asked.  
"Why?" I asked.  
"I...was trying to find someone. Crow. Uh...Senji I guess since..."  
Clara moved towards her car.  
"Yes, we know Senji." She said.  
Ganta looked at her.  
"Can you...take me to see him?" He asked.  
I frowned as Clara opened her door.  
"I suppose." She said as she motioned to the door on her side.  
I moved to the passenger side and climbed in.  
"Why are you looking for Senji?" She asked.  
"Well...I...I don't really know who else to go to. I mean, he said I needed to grow up, but...I just don't know how." He said.  
Senji was right.  
Scared little kid.  
He needed someone like Senji to help guide him.  
Someone who actually had a sense of honor and justice and some semblance of patience.  
Clara drove back to her house and I looked up as Senji opened the front door.  
I was out before either of them and heading for him.  
He frowned as he reached out to me.  
"Baby?"  
"Sorry, I just feel a little sick." I said.  
"Want some soup? I just made some for lunch." He said.  
I nodded.  
He looked up again as Clara got out, followed by Ganta.  
"What's the kid doing here?"  
Ganta came to the front step and stared at him.  
"Senji." I mumbled.  
"Yeah." He turned to take me inside as I felt sick.  
I wasn't entirely sure why, but just the feeling of anger I felt when I thought of how Senji had been hurt so much over this kid made me sick.  
I knew it was wrong to not like him, but I just didn't.  
Maybe because of how much I love Senji.  
He led me into the kitchen and sat me at the table.  
"What smells good Senji?" Clara asked as she set her keys on the table by the door.  
"Dumplings and beef." He said as he brought me a bowl.  
Ganta stood uneasily in the doorway as Clara moved to get a bowl.  
"So what are you here for kid?" Senji asked as he sat beside me.  
"I just..." He frowned. "What about your eye? Your arm?"  
Senji laughed. "It does pay to have healers as family. Fenix and her brother healed me up good as new." He motioned to the stove. "Get something to eat, you look dead on your feet."  
Clara started to sit down, but stood again to help him.  
I took a small bite of the thick broth.  
The tiny dumplings looked like little puffy hearts.  
I held one up on my spoon and looked at Senji.  
"Like it? I figured I'd try it since it sounded funny."  
I leaned into him. "It's cute." I ate it.  
It was just the right amount of solid on the outside and squishy inside.  
"How did you..."  
"I baked them first, then put them in the broth when the meat was done from how I cooked it." He said.  
Clara sat down and Ganta sat beside her.  
"Talking about needing to grow up over soup..." Ganta said.  
Senji laughed. "Deja-vu isn't it?"  
I ate a little more of the beef and dumplings.  
Unlike normal, this went over quite well with my stomach. Meat and carbs.  
Senji took another bite as Ganta hesitantly tried some.  
The boy frowned. "Where did you get this?"  
"I made it. When not in that shithole, I actually do cook. And damn well if you ask my friends." Senji said. "Turns out, my crew was alive all these years."  
Ganta frowned at him. "Really?"  
"Yeah, Loki saved them while he was on vacation with his healing Branch like Fenix has. Since Kan was his friend too and they were in the hospital during my trial." Senji said as I finally pushed the bowl away.  
I had almost managed to finish it.  
He looked down at my bowl.  
"Done?" I nodded. "Good. I finally found something else you'll handle well." He sighed.  
"She's Phoenix? The woman you said you got free?" Ganta asked.  
Senji nodded. "This is Fenix, my fiancee."  
Ganta looked at me before putting his head on the table in a submissive pose.  
"I'm so sorry for all the shit that happened to Senji after you left because of me. I never wanted him to get hurt because of me, but he just...he's him and even though I kept trying to get him to leave, he came back and helped me again and...I'm just so sorry I almost got him killed twice."  
I looked at him.  
"It...it's okay." I said. He looked up at me. "I...still don't like that you got him hurt, and it might take me a while to ever like you, but Senji just can't turn away from people like you and I."  
Ganta sighed. "You don't have to like me, I'm fine with that. I just wanted to apologize anyway."  
"So what are you going to do from now on?" Senji asked.  
"Well...I thought about getting my schooling finished online...since..." Senji nodded. "But that test shouldn't take me long. And then maybe see about finding a job near here. Someplace that will take me."  
"How about working for me?" Senji asked.  
Ganta frowned.  
"I'm getting a small thing set up that will contract out to the local police force when they have need of Deadman help. It'll be me, another woman named Karina with skills like Hummingbird but even more deadly and controlled, Karako said she'll join up with us when she comes back into the city this weekend, and Fenix is going to be our home base manager." Senji said.  
"You...do that for me?"  
"Sure, you can even stay at the house when we get it remodeled. Until I can buy the land around my place and build an actual building for a base. I'm looking with Clara into getting that done too." Senji said.  
The boy looked ecstatic.  
"For now, where have you been staying?" I asked.  
He looked a little uneasy. "Well...the hospital Shiro is in has been letting me stay overnight in her room in the other bed, but that's not really allowed..."  
Senji nodded.  
"Until their house gets done, you can crash on the couch here." Clara said. "Not like Deadmen don't outnumber Kan and I anyway. What's one more?"  
She smiled at me.  
"I'm sorry." I said.  
"Don't worry about it Fenix. Senji is family and so are you. Loki too. If I didn't want you here, you wouldn't be here." She said.  
"Speaking of the house, it's almost time for me to head over. The guys Domon got to help me are coming at one." Senji said.  
He stood up and finished off the rest of my bowl before carrying both of ours to the sink and rinsing them out.  
"I'll get it put away." Clara motioned to the rest of the pot of soup. "I want a bit more anyway."  
Ganta finished his bowl and hurried towards the sink.  
"Um...can I come? To help?" He asked.  
Senji shrugged. "I guess."  
He looked at me. "Do you want to come too?"  
I shook my head. "I think I'll get some rest. I'm not feeling good today."  
He came to me and leaned down to kiss my forehead.  
I watched him kneel beside me. "You will call me if you get worse?"  
"I'm just really tired today. I'll be alright."  
Senji held my hands.  
"Promise me, or I'm staying here Nix."  
"I'll call you if anything changes." I said.  
"Don't worry Senji, I'll give you hourly updates." Clara teased.  
"Screw off, I just worry dammit." He flushed slightly as he flipped her off.  
I smiled as he stood up.  
I reached to pull on his shirt and he leaned down to kiss me.  
"I'll be back later, alright? About eight."  
I nodded.  
He motioned for Ganta to follow him outside.  
"Come on, we'll run it." He said.  
"Is it close?"  
The door closed on Senji's laughter.  
I did love his warm laugh.  
xXx  
I looked at the simple spice cake as I finished smoothing the frosting on it.  
"Looks good." Kan swiped a bit of frosting from the tub.  
"It's not homemade. You think he'll mind?"  
"Given how you burn water, I think he'll be impressed it isn't black under that frosting." Loki said from the table as he finished the deviled eggs in their tray.  
Clara took the finished eggs to the fridge for him as Kan set the roast he finished testing back in the oven to stay warm and get a little softer.  
I stuck my tongue out at Loki.  
I reached for the sifter I'd set up with green sugar and dusted the top of the cake before Kan helped me spell out the words carefully.  
Nothing totally fancy, but for once, Senji didn't cook dinner.  
We had.  
Clara had thrown the roast in as soon as he and Ganta left. I had helped her about two hours ago to get the potatoes and carrots to soften in the juice from the roast and Loki had worked on the eggs while Kan made rolls from a recipe his mother left them at their wedding as a gift with some others.  
He said they were the best and they honestly smelled wonderful as they stayed warm in the oven with most everything else.  
I pulled out the box holding the rings as Kan put the lid on the pan holding my poor cake.  
I really wasn't a great cook.  
But I had gotten better since Loki and I got separated.  
Enough to make basic meals.  
Nothing like Senji though.  
We sat at the table as Clara looked at the clock.  
Senji was a bit late.  
I got up and moved to the living room to look out the windows.  
I sighed as a truck pulled up in the near dark and Senji and Ganta climbed out.  
"He's home." I called out to them.  
I went to open the door as they came to the steps.  
Senji frowned even as he put his arm around me.  
"What the hell have you guys been up to?" He shook his head. "Nevermind. Loki." He called out.  
Loki stood in the doorway to the kitchen.  
I caught sight of the blood dripping from Ganta's hand even though he held a rag to it.  
"Stupid kid went to grab the table saw when it got knocked over and the corner screw came loose and gashed him. That's why we were running late. The guys wanted to take him down to the hospital but I said you were a bit of a medic so I wanted you to look at him first." Senji said.  
Loki pulled Ganta into the kitchen and into the bathroom by the pantry.  
Senji and I stood in the doorway as Loki pulled the rags away.  
It was still flowing pretty nicely. He should have been at least a little anemic by now.  
Loki reached in his pocket and pulled his knife free as he had Ganta stick his hand under the water to make sure nothing had gotten in the wound.  
"Fuck that hurts." Ganta cussed as Loki pulled the knife across his own finger.  
Ganta stood shocked as Loki ran his cut over the gash.  
My brother held his wrist tightly as Ganta tried to pull away from the burn.  
"That hurts."  
"Suck it up." Loki and Senji said simultaneously.  
"The burn is the rapid healing of your flesh and better you to take it than me." Loki said.  
He let go of Ganta as the gash sealed up.  
My brother wiped his finger off on a clean corner of a rag and I saw the cut heal up instantly.  
I turned Senji back to the kitchen.  
"I got you something." I said.  
He frowned.  
I sat him down and set the box in front of him.  
"What is this?" He looked at me.  
"Happy Birthday Senji." I kissed his cheek.  
He turned to kiss my lips as I leaned over his shoulder.  
He flipped the lid open and grinned.  
"Totally forgot about these." He laughed. "Thanks baby."  
He pulled his broken rings off and slipped the new ones on.  
"Perfect." He flipped the blades out and tested the edge with the opposite thumb before retracting them.  
Clara and Kan set a bag in front of him.  
"Seriously guys?"  
"Hey, we could have invited the entire crew and made a big fuss." Kan said.  
Senji shuddered under my arms.  
"I'll deal with that in a couple days."  
He reached to pull the paper from the bag and laughed as he pulled out the box.  
"Please tell me this is a gag." He frowned at them as he held up the popcorn popper box.  
"Yes." Clara laughed. "I couldn't find any other boxes that fit. But that one was in the pantry still."  
Senji sighed as he opened the box.  
I was pretty shocked as he pulled out the envelopes.  
He opened one and I saw papers and papers stating his innocence in the crime he'd gone to Deadman Wonderland for.  
He set them aside and opened the other one.  
"I had to go through some loops this week to get it filled out, but once Marcel gave me some copies of those, I was able to finish the paperwork." Kan said.  
His stained police record had been cleared and the documents filled for an honorable service. Senji pulled out another smaller letter and read through it quickly.  
"Thanks you guys." He reached up to cover my arms with his hand and I kissed his cheek.  
"Everyone wanted to get you backpay retirement, but the station just had you signed off as non-active for these past years. You can come back if you want." Kan said.  
Senji shook his head slightly. "No, I'll stick with contracting out. Domon has pretty much convinced the board it's a good idea to have my company on their team."  
"It's true. We do need you." Loki said. "I'm just a glorified combat medic."  
I smiled as Senji carefully dumped out the rest of the box.  
"We kept a couple of your uniforms all these years, but now you can keep your old badge and gun too. And the keys are fake, but everyone at the station chipped in so if you go down to the dealership, there's already almost ten thousand down on whatever you want."  
Senji buried his face against my arms.  
"You guys suck." He mumbled.  
"We know." Loki laughed. "You absolutely hate us. Don't worry, we all expect good shit for our birthdays too."  
Senji flipped him off.  
I pulled away and Clara and Kan helped me take everything but the cake out.  
"Seriously?" Senji frowned as I sat beside him.  
I leaned against him and held his hand.  
"I love you and I wanted your first birthday as a free man to be special."  
He sighed. "It already was. I have you right?"  
I nodded. "Just enjoy it."  
"I will be getting my revenge in December, you know that right?"  
I smiled. "Nothing expensive."  
"No promises." He said.  
Ganta stood still until Loki kicked the chair beside him at the end of the table between him and Senji.  
"Join us kid. No need to stand on ceremony. Any friend of Senji's is a friend around here."  
Ganta nodded.  
Poor kid had been thrown entirely out of his game today. Finding Senji, getting offered a job and a place to live while he finished working on his schooling, getting injured, healed, and now he probably felt a bit out of it because he didn't even know today was Senji's birthday.  
I ate a bit of my food, laughing with the rest as my brother and Kan teased Senji.  
But he was happy.  
Really happy.  
I couldn't clear my plate again, but Senji did for me.  
"Feeling alright?"  
"Yeah. I had something earlier, so I'm fine. Clara made sure I ate."  
Senji looked at her and nodded.  
"Um..." Ganta started. "Can I ask...why do you worry about her so much? If she's a healer?"  
Senji sighed. "Because I'm paranoid and she's carrying my child."  
Ganta looked at me. "But..."  
"I got pregnant while in that place and Senji got Clara to get me out." I said.  
"Because he wouldn't want what happened to Owl to happen with you guys..." Ganta sighed.  
"No, I didn't." Senji said.  
Clara got up as Loki and Kan cleared the table a bit.  
She pulled my cake out and carried it to the table.  
I felt a bit nervous as Senji looked at it.  
"Really guys?"  
"It was her idea." Clara pointed at me.  
He looked down at me.  
"I...I've never had the chance to do this before."  
"Probably because you burn water." Loki said.  
Senji frowned at him.  
"I made it from a box, I couldn't have screwed up too badly." I said.  
Senji laughed. "I'm sure it's fine."  
He cut into it and pulled himself a large piece.  
"A small one?" He asked me.  
I nodded.  
He cut me a much smaller piece.  
Everyone got a bit.  
I hesitated as we waited for Senji to taste it.  
He looked at us as he stuffed a bit in his mouth.  
"What?" He mumbled around the cake. "Fine by me."  
I sighed as I took a tiny bite.  
It was alright.  
I managed to finish my cake and we put everything away before moving to the living room.  
Loki pulled out a few matching decks of cards and we all started playing rummy.  
I was not very good, but Senji helped me.  
It was almost midnight when Kan said he needed to sleep.  
He still had work tomorrow.  
As did Loki.  
They started to head upstairs as Senji cleaned up the cards.  
"I need to go into the office tomorrow, but if you need the car..." She started.  
Senji shook his head.  
"Until the guys come to help on the house, I'll just stay here with Fenix and Ganta."  
She nodded. "In that case, let me get some blankets and pillows."  
Ganta moved to help her pull a large blanket from the closet.  
Senji helped me up from the floor and started to lead me upstairs.  
"Night Ganta." He waved at the boy.  
Ganta waved back.  
"Night Senji."  
I smiled as we walked upstairs.  
"What're you so happy about?" He opened the door to our room and closed it behind us.  
"Nothing. You're good with kids, really. Under that roughness, you are soft to some people."  
He pulled me close. "Especially you."  
I stood on my toes to kiss him.  
"Of course. I love you."  
"I love you too." He said softly.  
I pulled away to change for bed.  
He pulled on the soft pants and held the blankets back for me.  
"Is it alright if Ganta stays with us?" He asked. "I'm sorry I didn't ask you first."  
"I...I'll get used to him." I said as I laid down.  
Senji slid in behind me.  
"Eventually, I would like for you to get to know him. He's a stupid but good kid."  
I shrugged.  
xXx  
It was halfway into October when the house was officially ready to move into.  
Just a little snow had started falling this morning.  
I rubbed my arms as I looked out the window at Senji.  
It had snowed a little all week.  
I smiled at the sight of Senji and Ganta in a snowball fight with the rest of the crew.  
Karako dropped a blanket over my shoulders and I looked at her.  
"You know...I'm really grateful for your brother." She said.  
I nodded.  
Somehow, despite everything Senji told me about, my brother had managed to find a good number of good Deadmen who were killed during the escape she had used to get away.  
He brought several back from the dead, including Owl.  
The man was still in the hospital, adjusting to being alive again.  
But with Karako visiting every day, I think he was coming around.  
"Loki is much stronger than me."  
"Not stronger, just different. He focused on healing so much he can revive the dead at a pretty high cost to himself, but you copy everyone you touch." She said.  
I sighed.  
"Also, I'm a bit grateful to Senji too. Had he not got a hold of me, I probably wouldn't have a job. Or a place to live. Or Nagi."  
I nodded. "It is pretty sad to think Senji and I almost endured the same thing and I think that thought is grounding him too. But he'll pull through."  
She nodded. "He actually acknowledged me yesterday. Normally he just kind of sits there, but I think the bell finally got to him again."  
"Good." I said.  
Loki had found Toto as well, but he couldn't bring the poor kid back.  
He at least brought him to be buried in the cemetery with his sister.  
I looked out at the yard again.  
"I'm going to join them." She said.  
I nodded.  
I watched Senji laugh until a ball of snow covered the right side of his head.  
He shook his head off as Loki beaned Ganta in revenge.  
The kid had some good accuracy.  
Senji tagged Karako's hand as he headed for the door.  
I looked up at him as he came in and shook himself off by the door.  
He hung up his coat on the wide row of hooks and moved towards me.  
"How are you feeling baby?" He pulled me down onto the couch with him.  
I sighed as I leaned in against his warm body.  
"I'm good."  
He nodded.  
"Good. The guys and I were going to run down to the store here shortly and pick up the stuff for tonight. Did you want to come?" He asked.  
I shook my head.  
"I'll work on my project." I said.  
"Alright." He nodded. "Did you want anything while I'm there?"  
I thought for a moment. "Not unless we're missing anything for brownies."  
"Is that so?" He held me close. "Is that how you ask me to cook?"  
I smiled as he ruffled my hair.  
"Will you make brownies when you get home?"  
He sighed. "Yeah."  
He held me in silence for another few minutes until we heard a shutter click.  
"Shit." We looked up at Karina as she tried to hide her phone.  
Senji frowned at her.  
"What?" She snapped. "You guys are adorable together."  
Senji slid away from me and she ran off screaming outside.  
I turned to look out the window as he ran after her.  
I smiled as Shindo tried to help his girlfriend hide from him.  
Senji hated pictures of him being mushy.  
I think mostly as a hangover from having to hold up a violent act in the prison.  
His crew tackled him and buried him in the shallow snow.  
I laughed as everyone joined in on it.  
Poor Senji.  
Maybe he wasn't as done adjusting to being back as I'd thought.  
But he was lucky he had friends to help him cope.  
All I really had of my own were him and Loki. But his friends took me in too and it was nice.  
They came back in laughing and everyone warmed up as Karina came to sit by me.  
She held up her phone to show me the picture she had taken.  
"Can you send it to me?"  
She nodded and quickly messaged it to me.  
I pulled out my phone as it vibrated and saved it to my phone.  
It was so cute to see Senji curled up on the couch holding me with such a peaceful expression.  
He came to glare at her and I showed him the new background to my phone.  
"You're horrible you know that?" He mumbled at me.  
"But it's nice."  
He narrowed his eyes at Karina. "You're fired. Again."  
She laughed as he and Kan and Shindo went to head out to the car he had gotten.  
It wasn't as fancy as I'd feared him getting. Just a sporty little thing that was good on gas. The paint job the crew had stolen it for was nice too.  
A flaming phoenix on a background of dark blue sky on the hood and a flock of crows following behind it along the sides.  
The artists had done a great job with the blending and detail.  
Senji seemed to love it once he'd gotten it back.  
Someday I might get a car since I still had a license, but I wasn't sure when.  
Karako walked past us into the kitchen.  
I liked the way Senji had remodeled the house.  
The front side had the kitchen with the dining room open to it and the living room. The back side had a few small bedroom/offices that Karako and Ganta stayed in and a bathroom downstairs under the stairs. Upstairs was taken up by a larger master bedroom and bathroom on one end of the house with several more smaller bedrooms that were currently empty and a third bathroom.  
Not that the small bedrooms were bad. A nice ten by fourteen feet on most of them but some were only ten by twelve.  
Senji had also worked with the guys Domon brought to help in order to design the building that was going up on the plot beside the house.  
A large building with apartments around three sides and a huge open area in the middle for training. Five stories tall with seventy efficiency apartments. Except the bottom floor of one side which had offices that were going to be filled with tech and gear for the jobs Senji was looking at.  
Quite a few Deadmen came out of the woodwork after the couple jobs Senji had teamed up with the police for.  
A couple agencies in Europe and America had asked if they could come help with some problems.  
I didn't like the thought of Senji going out of Japan though.  
He said he wouldn't.  
Karako offered to be lead of a team if he did decide to take oversea jobs.  
I looked up as she held a mug in front of my face.  
"Here space cadet." She sat beside me as I took it. "What are you blanking out for?"  
"I was just thinking about the fact that everything is different. Deadmen are popping up everywhere and making a mess of things. Senji has proven to be one of the good guys and now everyone wants him to help with their problems."  
"Well, it is getting more difficult to hide for people like us. But like I said. If you and Senji want, I'll be the one who goes out overseas with a team."  
I shook my head. "I think Senji is going to stick close to home for now, settle this dying fire before working on other things."  
She nodded. "He said about the same when I brought up the incident in New York the other day."  
Karina sighed. "We do have a good couple of people now that Ganta has his papers and doesn't have to do school. But not enough to go out of country for a while."  
"Don't worry so much Phoenix, there is always going to be someone somewhere causing problems and Even Edge will be needed." Karako said. "If evolution decrees that us Deadmen are here to stay, then nothing natural will stop it."  
I nodded.  
I finished part of the mug of hot cider before getting up to head for my project.  
Only a couple weeks left before Halloween.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**  
Senji looked at me as he pulled the shirt on.  
"I still can't believe you kept this secret from me for a month." He said as he adjusted the feathered collar.  
I had tried to keep his more simple. Going with the Crow idea, but making it less obvious by sticking with simple things. The overlapping feather pattern on his sleeves to match the embroidery I'd done on the front and back of his shirt, with the tail end of his shirt being longer and tapered slightly like a real crow when not flying.  
His plain black jeans had gotten a bit of feathering at the cuffs around his boots and along the outer seam of each leg.  
Nothing fancy.  
He flushed slightly as I fixed the bodice of my dress over my belly.  
I had to measure carefully to not constrict myself.  
The plain red dress had been decked out in glittery red and orange and yellow fabric feathers that actually fluttered when I moved.  
I slipped my arms through the sleeves and the sheer glittering gold fabric creating the illusion of wings from my waist up to my wrists gave me full movement.  
"You look amazing."  
"I figured...if people were still going to think back on the Carnival names, we could use that to our advantage. Even out here, Crow still scares other Deadmen." I said.  
He nodded.  
"You definitely did great with your dress." He moved to pull me close.  
"You'll get glitter on yourself." I mumbled as he leaned down to kiss me.  
"Who cares. Everyone knows the Crow likes to play with fire." He grinned.  
He dusted off his shirt and I saw a couple flecks of glitter fall off him.  
He held his arm out to me and I tucked my hand against his elbow.  
We walked downstairs and I looked as Karako was helping Nagi adjust the lapels of his shirt.  
She'd gone for simple like Senji and just used the colors of her bird.  
Nagi had come around last week and Senji and Ganta helped him get settled in.  
He and Karako were starting to act more like a couple than leader and partner now that he had come to terms with everything.  
His white clothes were very distinctively decorated like a snowy owl.  
Ganta came from his room tugging on his collar.  
I had helped him put together a costume based on his Woodpecker persona.  
"Are you sure this doesn't look like shit?" He asked.  
Nagi laughed as Senji ruffled the boy's hair.  
"You look fine little woodpecker." Karako said. "Now come on or we'll be late to our own party."  
I nodded as Senji moved to the door.  
He held up my coat and I slipped my arms in the sleeves.  
"You look great Fenix." Karako said as she pulled her jacket on.  
Nagi rubbed at his neck. I think he was still trying to get used to the fact that Loki had fixed his vocal cords too.  
"Yeah, quite beautiful." He said.  
Ganta nodded. "Senji definitely got lucky after all that crap."  
Senji opened the door as he reached for my hand.  
I walked with him towards the recently finished headquarters.  
The real construction crew he had hired had been pretty quick about getting it done.  
Just a couple weeks should never have been good enough, but Senji had made sure everything was good to go.  
Ganta ran ahead and held the door for us.  
He had settled in and I had gotten more used to him.  
I looked around the large open room as the few Deadmen who had joined the crew over the last week stood on the balconies outside their rooms.  
Sherry was a sweet young girl who was really good with computers. Similar to that boy Karako talked about who betrayed them. A hacker extraordinaire. She could use her blood to feed directly into the computer network from any point of access. Even a phone turned into a supercomputer in her hands. She had taken the codename Techno.  
Cain had the ability to use his own blood to strengthen himself beyond belief, kind of like Karako, but his was all internal. Like armor under his skin. Even bulletproof. Even Ganta proof.  
He said he'd go for Juggernaut.  
Rai was a walking lightning strike. His blood generated enough electricity enough to run a power grid and he could use small amounts from his hands to shock people into unconsciousness instantly. I called him Sparky and he hadn't objected.  
And Jude was just a boy Ganta's age who hadn't wanted to get thrown in prison like him. His school agreed to him living in the building as long as he finished getting through his last year of high school. He could make small balls of his blood like Nagi, but instead of being explosive, they were just concentrated energy blasts. Enough to knock out a building, which is what got him in trouble to begin with. Luckily it had been set for demo anyway and the mess had been fairly well contained. He took the name Shockwave.  
They came downstairs as Senji was making sure everything was good.  
I turned as a knock sounded on the door.  
It was unusual for anyone to knock around our group.  
Ganta moved to pull the door open as Senji pulled me behind him.  
Karako was already half covered as Cain charged forward.  
The man in the door wasn't familiar, but obviously hated either Deadmen or just us.  
I watched him open fire, but his bullets were stopped by an orb of blood.  
Cain charged past the automatic gun and slammed his hand into the man's chest.  
It was more than enough to throw him and force him to drop his gun.  
The blood at the end fizzled out and a pile of bullets dropped at the end of the gun.  
I watched Sherry move to catch Jude and Senji turned to see Rai shock the man cold.  
"What the hell?" Ganta asked.  
"Well, we're bound to make enemies." Senji frowned. "Guess he was waiting for us to all be in the same room."  
I shook and Senji moved me to a chair as he pulled a rope from beside the door. It had been used to help hang the streamers from the ceiling earlier.  
Now it was used to tie the man up.  
"Do we call the police?" Jude asked as Sherry moved him to my table.  
I looked at him as Senji already had Domon on speed dial.  
"Was that you blocking the bullets?" I asked Jude.  
He nodded. "I...didn't think I could do it, but when I thought of how a spray of bullets would kind of ruin our party, I just pictured an inversion of my usual trait." He said. "Instead of exploding, I just wanted my orb to implode."  
Nagi sat beside him. "Yes, the theory was sound. While the firing was happening, your orb couldn't implode. And because your blasts are just energy, they didn't crush down the bullets when it did finally activate."  
"No, that was just me not being ready to try that..." He said. "I'm pretty sure it might have blown up in our faces otherwise."  
"But you discovered something amazing." I said.  
He nodded. "Yeah. This place is good for me in that regard. In just days with Nagi I've learned so much about how to use this shit for good." He grinned.  
Nagi smiled as Karako went to talk to Senji.  
She had been ready to be a living shield for Nagi.  
He watched her.  
"She's too reckless."  
"She loves you." I said.  
He sighed.  
"I know. I just...I still think about my wife."  
I reached to touch his hand.  
"I'm sure she would want you to be happy. Not to forget her, but try to be happy again." I assured him.  
He nodded. "Yes, she would."  
Senji came over to us and knelt in front of me.  
"You alright?" He asked.  
I nodded. "Jude managed to stop every bullet pretty well."  
Senji sighed. "I meant the shock."  
I touched his hands on my legs.  
"I'm fine. It isn't the first time I've been scared. I didn't really have time to think about it because everyone jumped into action quickly. You've got a good team here."  
He nodded. "Pretty much everyone is on their way, including the on duty officers to take him away." Senji said.  
I nodded.  
He stood up again and headed back to the double doors.  
"He'll be a good father." Sherry said. "I wish I could find a man like him."  
"Few and far between and seemingly all taken." Jude laughed. "He's a good older brother figure too. Kind of like a mentor, but still ready to play with me and Ganta."  
I nodded. "I know."  
xXx  
The party started up without a hitch as everyone showed up.  
Senji used Ganta's skill to blow up the balloons of confetti hanging from the ceiling and Sherry turned the lights to their low points.  
A couple officers had brought their families and I watched as the kids played with Ganta and Jude.  
The two could have been brothers for how similar they looked.  
But Jude looked more grown up.  
Clara came up to me as Senji went to get us both some food.  
"You did really well on that." She said.  
"Thanks. I tried to keep Senji's simple, but I just wanted mine to be a bit more." I said.  
"No, you both look good. I'm quite impressed. Maybe when you aren't fretting over Senji at work, you can do things like this."  
I frowned as Larissa came to me.  
"She's right, you did a damn good job with the design." She said. "I'm getting plenty of inspiration for my project too."  
"What are you working on?" I asked.  
"Something for one of my old regulars. He wants something pretty unique, so I have to pull out all the stops this time." She said with a glance at Clara. She held her hand out. "Not sure we actually met before. I'm Larissa, the one who makes Senji's jacket and some of Fenix's clothes and jacket."  
"Ah. I've been wondering who made that thing. Kan was looking at getting a leather jacket like his. Think you can work on that after your project? For payment of course."  
Larissa laughed. "Of course. I'll give you guys a discount on it since I've got several people asking me about Senji's jacket. I'll pull it together when I make the uniform jackets for Even Edge."  
"Uniform jackets?" I frowned.  
"Senji didn't tell you?" Larissa asked. "He asked me to make up some leather jackets for everyone on the team. I'm coming over tomorrow to get measurements to start work. He wants Calvin to do the searing on the backs with the emblem my husband came up with."  
She pulled up the image on her phone and I was a bit impressed.  
It was a yin and yang symbol in which the dark side was a crow and the light was a phoenix.  
It was nice.  
"Senji said he wanted something distinctive, yet went with the whole idea of this group being the ones who could even out the playing field against rogues." Larissa said. "I think it fits pretty well. The symbol it's based off of kind of represents balance but it also sets a bit of fear into people who have heard of Crow and Phoenix. Your last fight actually set things up pretty well for you if you'd ended up staying back there. Some of the older fighters were starting to get a bit nervous watching you. You went from being a timid little thing to just dropping that kid in three hits. No blood involved."  
I flushed slightly. "I wasn't trying to hurt him."  
"Oh you didn't. Rei ended up being really pissed when she took off his ear and it grew back by the next day. He bitched about the pain, but you definitely earned a fan. I think I remember him saying something about how you made it look easy to change."  
I sighed. "Did he...escape too?"  
She shook her head. "No, last I heard he was getting retried next month on his sheet of crimes. Most petty, but he did nearly kill three people in one of his robberies."  
I nodded.  
"Ah, that case. I think Marcel has that one too. He did good work with Senji. He might be able to get this guy done pretty well too. Marcel is a good fair player." Clara said.  
I moved to join Senji where he had been distracted by someone.  
As I came closer, I saw it was a woman.  
"It's so good to see you alright." She said.  
"I've been fine." Senji said.  
"But you never came to see me when you got out."  
Senji shrugged. "I'd heard you moved on and I already did. I'm happy now."  
"You were happy then too." She touched his chest and Senji shied away.  
I frowned as he looked away from her.  
An old ex-girlfriend?  
Her blond hair was wavy and suited her pale skin, but she showed far more than required when it came to skin.  
She moved to stand against him.  
"I can make you happy again." She stood up and kissed him.  
I felt my blood boil for a second before I felt Domon touch my shoulder.  
I watched Senji shove her away.  
"Don't ever think you still know me." He wiped at his mouth with the back of his hand. "I have someone who actually gives a shit about me. All you wanted was someone you thought could protect you. You never cared about me. Just being with a cop."  
She frowned at him. "But you're not a cop now."  
"You made your bed with a gang, you sleep in it." Senji turned away from her and moved towards me.  
He glanced at Domon.  
"My fiancee isn't a woman to take lightly."  
"What, is she a freak too?"  
I clenched my hand and the blades on my left ring bit into my skin.  
I let the blood form a blade.  
"Yes. I am a Deadman too. Leave Senji alone or the police won't ever find enough of you to write you down as anything but missing."  
The look on her face and the silence around us was worth it.  
"You just admitted to premeditated murder in a room full of cops." She sounded shocked.  
Domon frowned. "Did we hear anything like that?" He glanced at some of the other cops.  
She watched them shrug.  
"I heard nothing of the sort. Just a promise." One of the other team leaders like Domon said.  
She turned and stormed out.  
Senji sighed. "Damn, day for scary shit eh?" He looked at me.  
I pulled the knife back and let my healing seal the tear in my hand.  
"Want one of us to follow her, boss?" Jude asked.  
"No. She won't come back. If she does, Fenix and I will handle it." Senji held up the plate of food he'd collected for me.  
"Hey, is it time for the fireworks?" Ganta asked.  
Senji nodded.  
"Yeah, I guess so."  
He moved with me to the door as everyone else helped pull out the fireworks.  
He helped me pull my coat on, ever taking care of me.  
He pulled his jacket on as I pushed the door open.  
I walked with him to the large area that everyone was gathering in.  
It was strange to do fireworks at Halloween, but apparently it had become a thing quite a few years ago when Senji and Kan started it because they liked the holiday better than most others.  
Senji wrapped his arms around me as Domon took charge of lighting off the fireworks since he carried a lighter still.  
"I love you Fenix." He said.  
I leaned against him.  
"I love you more Senji."  
He grinned as he leaned down to kiss my cheek.  
"Get a room." Cain called out.  
Senji flipped him off. "I own yours, so shut up."  
"Got you on that one." Jude said. Cain pulled the kid in a headlock and ruffled his head.  
It was nice to see everyone enjoying themselves. Police and Deadmen who otherwise might have ended up in the prison as well.  
I sighed as I shivered.  
All the things that had gone on today were making me tired.  
Senji held me close as the last firework went off.  
"You alright baby?"  
"Just tired." I said.  
"Go on and get her to bed then." Karako said from beside us. "Nagi and I can cover cleanup. I'm sure we can get help."  
Everyone nodded.  
"No sense making little Phoenix wear herself out." Rai said as he ran his hand through his spiky blond hair. He looked exhausted himself. Maybe up too early.  
"Yeah, we got this." Shindo said.  
Senji nodded and started to lead me to the house.  
My feet just wouldn't move.  
My body started shutting down as I frowned.  
Loki was at my side as Senji caught me.  
"Kari." My brother called for the doctor and she came over.  
Senji had wanted to invite her and Roy since they had already done a lot for us.  
It ended up being a good thing.  
"She looks like she's dropping fast." Kari said as she tested my pulse.  
I felt fine, I just couldn't move my body.  
"Can we get her to the hospital?" Senji asked.  
"Kid, you have enough cops here to keep you covered." Domon said.  
"You can take my cruiser." The other lead said. "I'll get a ride to get it."  
Domon nodded and Senji picked me up.  
He hurried towards the police cruiser as Loki raced ahead to get the door.  
Kari jumped up front as Senji got me settled in between my brother and himself.  
Domon flipped the sirens on as he started the car.  
"What's wrong with her?" Senji asked.  
Loki frowned. "I'm not sure exactly. It's as if something got into her and her blood is combating it violently. I had this happen a couple years ago when I got pneumonia."  
I closed my eyes as Domon broke every limit and ran lights.  
"Baby, stay with me." Senji brushed his hand over my arm in a soothing motion.  
I gripped his other hand as I couldn't fight the pull.  
xXx  
I woke to beeping and pain.  
The monitors made a steady sound and I opened my eyes.  
I turned my head to see the room. The curtains were closed to both the outside and the hallway.  
Senji sat asleep uncomfortably in the chair beside my bed.  
I tried to move my hand and the rustle of the sheets woke him.  
He groaned as he sat up and leaned towards me.  
"Are you feeling alright baby?" He asked.  
I hurt, but I was fine.  
I nodded.  
He sighed.  
"God I thought I lost you for a while there. Loki swore you would pull through and I knew he was right. I didn't want to think about losing you forever." Senji said.  
My throat felt dry. "What happened?"  
Senji reached to push a button on the wall.  
"Your body started rejecting our baby." He said.  
I stared at him.  
"And..."  
I looked at the door as it opened.  
Kari came in.  
"How are you feeling?" She asked.  
"Fine. What happened?" I asked her.  
"Well, you..." She looked at the floor. "You miscarried."  
I faced the ceiling.  
Senji moved to hold me.  
I just couldn't process it.  
Five months just for this?  
"Loki and I think that your body rejected your baby once his Deadman blood developed and he..." She covered her eyes and I could see she was trying to fight crying. "He didn't survive due to how premature he was."  
I felt Senji lift me up a little and pull me to his lap.  
He held me close and tight.  
How badly was this killing him?  
He looked like he'd barely eaten in days or left my side.  
"Loki tried so hard to save him, he really did." She said. "I finally made him stop today. I just...couldn't watch him do that to himself."  
"We can try again baby." Senji said.  
And risk losing another baby?  
No thanks.  
"I'm so sorry Fenix. I swear if I had known this would happen..." She started.  
I turned to bury my face in Senji's shirt.  
Someone must have been making him change every day, because he still smelled somewhat clean.  
Senji held me tight against him.  
Kari left the room.  
"God I'm sorry baby." He said.  
I couldn't help the tears falling.  
He just held me and rocked slightly.  
I felt the couple tears fall from him too.  
"I'm not going to lose you too." He said.  
He kissed the top of my head.  
"Promise me you won't give up on me?" He sounded almost scared.  
As if he thought it was his fault and I would blame him.  
I looked up at him.  
How in hell could I possibly blame him?  
Or give up on loving him?  
"What?" I frowned.  
"I still love you Fenix, no matter what. I'll do whatever it takes to make you happy, just please don't give up on being with me."  
I tugged him down to kiss him.  
"I love you Senji." I settled in against him.  
He curled up in the chair and I felt him relax.  
"I swear I'll do anything you want me to, but please don't ever scare me like that again."  
I kissed his neck.  
"I'm sorry."  
"I don't ever want to lose you. Knowing that you were out here waiting for me kept me sane in that hell, but there were times when I was so scared you'd be gone and I just...trust me, it wasn't pretty. Ask Ganta. I think I scared him a couple times too." Senji said.  
"I'll always be here." I said. "As long as you'll let me."  
He nodded. "Forever."  
I gripped his shirt as I shivered and he yanked the blanket from the bed to wrap around us both.  
I closed my eyes and listened to his strong heartbeat under my cheek.  
xXx  
Twenty four hours later I was cleared to leave.  
Kari still looked sad and Loki held her.  
I think it hit her almost as hard because she was dating my brother.  
They hadn't said anything about it to anyone, but the way they acted said a lot to me.  
Senji settled me in the passenger seat of his car and hurried around to the drivers side.  
He slid in and started the car as he buckled in.  
He knew I hated when he didn't stay safe.  
He left the hospital behind.  
I was quiet as he drove towards our house.  
His phone went off and he answered.  
"Yeah?"  
I couldn't hear who was on the other end.  
"Yeah, we're still on." Senji said. "Today? I think I can do it. She's alright. We're fine."  
I reached to put my hand on his thigh as he pulled into the driveway.  
He glanced at me.  
"Yeah, I'll meet you at three. And yes, I'll pick up Karina." He said before hanging up.  
"Who was that?"  
"Larissa. She wants to do a test fit for the jackets for the team and the coat she made for you."  
"So why Karina?" I frowned.  
"She's on the team. I'll just tell her to worry about your coat later. I...I don't want you leaving the house for a bit." I went to speak. "Please Nix, I'm just worried about you."  
I nodded.  
He opened his door and was out before I could do more than unbuckle.  
He was at my door as I reached to open it.  
I let him lead me inside and was assaulted by the lights and warm smell of the fire in the fireplace and hot chocolate and brownies.  
Karako held out a mug of hot chocolate as Senji pulled my jacket off.  
I took it as she urged me to the couch.  
"You doing alright?" She asked.  
I nodded.  
Nagi stood beside the couch as she sat beside me.  
"We were all worried about you." He said.  
I looked up at everyone from the team gathered in the living room.  
Jude looked up at me from the floor where he and Ganta were playing cards.  
"Seriously." Jude said. "You're kind of like my adoptive mother now, I think I'd be a bit lost if you and Senji just gave up on everything."  
I felt the tears well up as Senji came to sit beside me.  
"It'll be alright Fenix. We're all here for you too. You and Senji pulled us out of some pretty rough spots." Cain said.  
Rai nodded in agreement. "The boss would have lost it without you and that just wouldn't be good."  
I did have friends.  
Nagi moved around to stand in front of me and knelt to look at me.  
Friends who understood this pain too.  
I reached to hug him and Senji didn't seem jealous as Nagi held me.  
"It gets easier...really. You'll never forget, but it'll get easier." Nagi said quietly.  
Karako touched my shoulder as I cried on Nagi's.  
"Just remember we all care about you, alright?" Ganta said.  
I nodded.  
Senji stood up.  
I took a breath as Nagi took his place while Senji moved to the kitchen.  
"Give me a few minutes." He said. "I need to get some stuff prepared before I go."  
Karako stood up and moved for the kitchen as well and Cain came to sit beside me.  
"This little team might be weird, but we're a family now." Rai said.  
I nodded.  
He knelt in front of me and flicked my forehead.  
"And even though I lost my old family, I know we aren't supposed to let each other hurt."  
I frowned at him as I rubbed the spot.  
"I know there are things you and Senji can do to have a baby without as much risk." Sherry said.  
I looked up at her as I heard something drop in the kitchen.  
"You can always try for a surrogate." She said.  
"What?"  
"Doctors can take an egg from you and sperm from him and then put the fertile egg in another woman. It has been done before. I just...I looked up some alternatives when your brother told us what happened."  
I nodded. "Thank you. I'll think about it."  
"I've got other researched ideas too if you want me to send you the links..."  
I nodded again.  
She pulled her phone out and I frowned as I realized I had no idea where my phone was.  
"I put it upstairs when...the party happened." Ganta said.  
Senji came back out of the kitchen.  
"Alright, leave it to cook and if we're not back by five, eat." He looked at Nagi. "Make sure she eats."  
Nagi nodded and Karako pulled her light coat on as Senji leaned close to me.  
"You just have to call me and I'll be back if you want."  
I shook my head. "No, I can't hold everything back just because of all this. Cain is right, what happens happens."  
"I never said that exactly." Cain said as Senji sighed.  
"Really, if you need anything, these guys are under direct orders to take care of you."  
"Don't worry boss, we've got it covered." Rai said.  
Sherry pulled her jacket on and I sighed as Senji headed for the door.  
"Senji?"  
He turned to face me.  
"I love you." I said.  
He grinned. "I love you too."  
He gave the others a sharp look as he grabbed his keys and followed the two women out.  
Some women would be worried about him, but I knew Karako and Sherry were good people.  
Nagi sighed as they drove away.  
"Why do you guys care so much?" I asked.  
"What can I say? Senji inspires me and you're just too lovable to not care." Jude said.  
I glanced at the older men around the room.  
"Senji scares the shit out of me and you more so. But not in a bad way. If that makes sense?" Cain said.  
Nagi laughed.  
"Because the Crow I knew of back in Deadman Wonderland put his life on the line to set all us innocents free. He had something to fight for and I don't want to see him without his anchor. I lost mine once and I've only just found something to replace it." Nagi said.  
I sighed.  
"Bunch of sappy mercenaries." I mumbled.  
"Better than stone hearted killers." Rai said.  
I watched as Rai pulled a movie from the mantle and put it into the tv.  
He came to sit on the arm of the couch beside Cain.  
I frowned as I caught the title.  
A regular action movie with almost no plot.  
Such a guy thing.  
But I settled in to watch it with them until the warmth from the fire and Nagi had me falling asleep on him.  
xXx  
I felt a slight shaking on my shoulder and then a hand was tucking under my hip.  
I opened my eyes and pushed away from Nagi's thigh.  
"Sorry." I mumbled at him as Cain started to pick me up.  
"It's fine. You were tired."  
He was too nice. But Ganta and Karako had told me about how he could be when he'd gone mad thinking everyone was dead.  
Cain laid me back down after Nagi got up.  
"Movie over?" I asked.  
Rai nodded.  
"Senji texted that they were dropping Karina off and then headed back home about ten minutes ago."  
I nodded.  
I pushed myself into a sitting position as I rubbed at my cheek.  
The material of his jeans had left an imprint on my face.  
"What time is it?" I asked.  
"Just after five." Nagi said.  
"Hungry?" Cain asked.  
I shrugged.  
I heard the sound of the car pulling up and stood up to stretch.  
Rai moved to take the movie out as the boys headed into the kitchen.  
I looked at the door as it opened and Karako came in laughing.  
"It's going to be really nice." She said.  
Senji laughed. "I know. It'll be good to actually see her in it." He said.  
He pulled his jacket off and set his keys on the hook under it.  
He came towards me and reached out to rub my cheek with the marks.  
"Mmm, I took a nap and ended up sleeping on Nagi's leg."  
Senji nodded as Karako nudged Nagi.  
"So, letting other women sleep with you now huh?" She teased him.  
Senji smiled as Nagi was flustered.  
"She was just tired and we were watching a movie." He said.  
I laughed as we all wandered into the kitchen.  
Senji sat me down and almost everyone sat at the extended table.  
Nagi helped Senji by gathering up bowls as Senji pulled the large pot from the stove.  
Rai pulled out cups and spoons for everyone and then went to get a tray of ice. I watched Ganta pull out the jug of milk and water from the fridge and several bottles of beer.  
Cain took a bottle as he passed and poured it over the ice in his cup.  
It was nice to see everyone eating together every once in a while.  
Ganta passed the other two bottles to Nagi and Senji on either side of me.  
I got myself some of the beef dumpling stew Senji had made up before.  
This time the dumplings were entirely soft and chewy and it was good.  
Everyone talked about something I had no idea about. I figured it was a job they were considering taking.  
Rai handed me the rest of the ice tray and I took it. I poured water into my glass and Senji held his bottle to me.  
"Have you tried this?"  
I frowned.  
I guess now I could drink again.  
I took a tiny sip of it and frowned before crinkling my nose at it.  
"That is still a no." I said.  
He sighed. "Someday." He promised.  
I slowly ate at my stew as they talked.  
I actually managed to finish it all this time.  
Senji looked at me as I sipped at my water.  
"Still tired?" He asked.  
"A little. I'll get energy back eventually."  
He nodded.  
Cleanup was quick with everyone helping.  
The four staying in the apartments headed out afterward.  
I started upstairs.  
"I'm going to go spoil her." Senji said.  
"Night." Ganta and Karako let him leave.  
I heard him coming up the stairs behind me as I paused in front of the door we had been thinking would lead to our child's room.  
He wrapped his arm around me and pulled me to keep going.  
He took me into our room.  
I stood there as he locked the door and came up behind me.  
"I know...I seem like I'm fine, but I'm not, really." He said.  
I turned to face him as he moved towards the bathroom.  
I watched him turn on the light and moved to the doorway.  
He started up the huge tub and looked at me as he sat on the side.  
He touched his chest.  
"He wasn't physically in me, but I was already wanting to be his father." I looked at the floor. "Nix, I just don't want you thinking I'm trying to forget already. Since this morning, I've been worried that you think I'm doing that."  
"I don't think you'll forget Senji." I said.  
"I'm never going to forget, but I can't not move forward either."  
"I...I don't want to be stuck like this, but...I don't want to risk losing another baby." I finally said my fear.  
Senji stood up and reached to pull me close.  
"We don't have to try again. Like Sherry said, there are other methods that are less dangerous for you." He pulled me towards the tub and shut the water off. It was plenty deep enough for a bath.  
"You'd...be willing to try them?" I asked.  
"I still want a child and I still want you to be the mother of my child, so yes." He said.  
I sighed in relief.  
I'd been a bit worried he wouldn't go for anything not traditional.  
"It wouldn't be my first choice, but I would rather have you safe and happy than anything."  
I nodded.  
"I'd rather you be happy too. If you really want to do overseas jobs..."  
"No. I'd like to lead, but I'd rather be home with you every night." He tugged at my shirt. "I'm good with just staying here in Japan."  
He pulled his shirt off and dropped it on the floor.  
I looked down at his skin.  
So much warmth and strength under that skin.  
He looked up at me with his gray eyes and I was reminded of the first time we took a shower together.  
I pulled my shirt off and undid my pants.  
He stood up and I stepped back slightly to kick my jeans off.  
"I want you." Senji undid his zipper and I saw his erection as he pushed his jeans off.  
I blushed slightly.  
"I'll probably always want you." He said.  
He reached out and pulled me close.  
"Do you still want me?"  
I nodded.  
He moved to get in the water and I stepped in after him as he stretched out in the tub.  
The water was just scraping hot, but it felt good.  
I moved to straddle his thighs.  
"In the bath?" I asked.  
He pulled me to kiss him.  
"Anywhere you want." He growled.  
I liked the way his cheeks flushed slightly and his eyes lit up as he said that. And that rumble in his voice was so sexy.  
I braced my hands on his chest as I moved onto him.  
Feeling him in me again was almost too much.  
I shuddered as he filled me.  
"Does it hurt?" He asked.  
"No." I felt his hands move up my waist.  
He settled his hands on my sides.  
"Good." He said. "Because that would really make me unhappy."  
I couldn't bring myself to move because I knew it would be more than enough.  
He thrust slightly into me.  
"Ahh, Senji."  
He groaned.  
"God this is so much better."  
I looked down at him as he moved his hands to my hips to help me ride him.  
"Than what?" I panted.  
"Jacking off." He groaned.  
He pulled me down onto him roughly and the water splashed against my back.  
My hair drifted over our skin under the water.  
"I...want to see that." I said.  
He groaned. "Later."  
"I want everything Senji. Before we ever have a child, I want to know every inch of you." I blushed.  
He growled as he reached down and flicked over my clit.  
It sent me over the edge instantly.  
He came hard with me.  
I barely came down from my high when he started to wash me.  
So gently, yet thoroughly.  
I took the cloth this time, before he could do himself.  
"If you really want to." He mumbled.  
I nodded and he let me wash him.  
I ran my fingers with the cloth over every muscle, much different than the efficiency washing I'd done to him when he'd killed Spider.  
I paused.  
Not killed.  
Slaughtered. There was no fight.  
Senji straight up murdered him.  
He looked down at me as I continued washing him.  
"What's wrong?"  
I held the cloth over his right arm.  
I felt bad about lying, but I couldn't bring that up again.  
"I was just thinking about what it would be like if Loki hadn't been able to heal your arm."  
Senji sighed.  
"I don't even want to imagine it." He said. "I couldn't hold you, feel your hair on my skin as I wrap my arms around you.  
I nodded as I finished.  
He stood up to grab his towel.  
As he stepped out, I pulled the plug.  
I was startled when he wrapped my towel around me.  
He moved to pick me up as the huge cloth soaked up the water from my skin.  
"Senji, I'm not dry yet." I tried to push away from him as he carried me to our bed.  
He laid me down and leaned to kiss me.  
"Doesn't matter. It's just water."  
He pulled the towel away from me and dropped it on the floor.  
I looked up at him as he dropped his to join.  
His messy black hair was slicked back mostly, but some bits were drying and sticking out a little.  
I reached up to run my fingers through his damp hair.  
He leaned down to trail kisses over my jaw and neck down to my collarbone.  
"You're too damn beautiful." He mumbled.  
I blushed slightly.  
"I..." He looked up at me from where he was moving down to my left breast. "I like how sexy you are."  
His cheekbones flushed, but not in embarrassment.  
I watched him tease my nipple with his teeth as his left hand moved to my other breast.  
My fingers tangled in his hair, constantly running through it.  
I tugged slightly when he gently bit the inside of my breast.  
"I know you want things too, but just let me spoil you tonight." He looked almost sad as he stared up at me.  
I nodded.  
He moved lower and I ended up letting go of his hair.  
I gripped the sheets as he spread my thighs and dove in to torment me with his tongue.  
I couldn't think as he adjusted me to be more open to him.  
My hands clenched on the fabric under me.  
Senji brought me over the edge before moving back up my body.  
He eased into me as I was trying to focus on him.  
My hands moved to his shoulders as he braced himself above me.  
"Baby, I'm only getting started."  
I stared up at him as he moved, slowly but deep.  
My short nails scraped down his back as I tried to urge him faster.  
He groaned at the slight pain, but moved harder and faster.  
I felt blood on my fingers as he changed angles by leaning back and holding my hips up.  
I cried out at the first stroke and gripped the red sheets again.  
He picked up my hand to put it back on his shoulder and my other moved as well.  
Senji hissed as I drew my nails down his arms when he pushed me over the edge crying out his name.  
He drew out my orgasm as long as he could before he spilled into me. "Fucking hell Fenix." He groaned.  
He winced as he moved to his back beside me. "One of these days you're going to actually leave scars." He said.  
"I'm sorry." I mumbled.  
He turned to his side and pulled me close to kiss me.  
"Never apologize for marking me. I love it." He grinned.  
"Masochist."  
"Only for you." He said.  
I moved to push myself up away from him.  
I went to look at his arms.  
"Don't you dare heal me." He said.  
I pushed him to show me his back and winced at the sight of the scores down his back.  
They were raw and still bleeding slightly.  
I got up from bed and moved to the bathroom, taking the towels as I went.  
I heard him get up as I reached in the cabinet for the box I'd gotten when we had gone shopping.  
I pulled it out as he came into the bathroom.  
He frowned as he looked at me.  
"I'm fine. Come back to bed so I can keep making love to you baby."  
I blushed as I shook my head.  
"I don't like hurting you Senji."  
"It'll scar and I'm tougher than you seem to think." He said.  
"I know how strong you are, I just don't like the thought of you bleeding because of me."  
He sighed and came closer  
"Alright. Take care of me." He moved to sit on the side of the tub and turned to show me his back.  
I reached for the damp cloth from earlier and dabbed at the streaks of blood.  
He winced, but didn't move.  
The scratches were still seeping a little as I opened the tube of ointment and spread it over his skin.  
He hissed.  
"I...found this stuff when we were shopping. It isn't supposed to make you heal any better, just not bleed." I said. "Since you seem to want the scars so badly."  
He sighed as the cooling effect kicked in.  
He stood up and faced me.  
"Alright, you've had your detour." He said.  
I barely put the cap back on before he took the tube and tossed it to the counter.  
He picked me up and I let him carry me back to bed.  
As he laid me down again, he covered me and slid into me again.  
I couldn't possibly keep up with him.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**  
It was a week until I found out what they had all been talking about over dinner before.  
The guys had all left in the morning and Senji had barely woken me up with a kiss hotter than usual before covering me and bringing me over the edge with him.  
I was still recovering from the sudden sex without any warning when he went to take a shower without me.  
His scratches had healed up nicely, with some clear scars to match my fingers.  
I stared at him as he came back out of the bathroom a couple minutes later wrapped in a towel.  
He pulled on his jeans and turned to look at me with a grin that was too sexy for his own good.  
I heard the knock on the door as he was buttoning his jeans.  
"Come in." He said.  
I yanked the blankets around me with a glare at him as Karako pushed the door open.  
"Good greif Senji, you should have been gone ten minutes ago. You're screwing up the schedule."  
"Oh shut up, I made the damn thing with this kind of holdup in mind." He said as he rifled in his dresser for a shirt.  
She pushed him out of the way and dug in the back of the drawer for a shirt wrapped in plastic.  
"Now shoo. Nagi is still waiting for you downstairs."  
Senji stuck his tongue out at her as he unwrapped the pristine white undershirt and pulled it on.  
She shoved him out the door.  
"You get that dirty and I'll kill you."  
He flipped her off as she closed the door in his face.  
She turned to face me.  
"Alright, we need to get moving."  
I just frowned.  
"Up." She ordered.  
I rolled out of bed, holding the sheet to me.  
She yanked it away and I frowned.  
"Bloody hell Fenix, I've got the same stuff."  
"I just..." I started.  
"No time." She urged me to the bathroom. "Do a damn good job and make sure you condition your hair." She said. "I'll be back before you get out."  
I frowned as I did as ordered.  
She was waiting in my room when I came out to get clothes.  
"Here." She motioned to the bed and I saw something very familiar.  
It wasn't quite the same, but it looked a lot like the old teal lingerie I'd snuck into Senji's room so long ago. Only this was shimmering gold.  
I frowned as I pulled it on.  
She had set aside a pair of plain jeans and a loose shirt of Senji's that buttoned up.  
"You don't have any button up shirts, so I had to take one of his work shirts." She said.  
I frowned as she quickly brushed through my hair while I fumbled with the buttons.  
She pulled it up in a neat bun and secured it.  
"You do have great hair. I envy that."  
I faced her. "Yours is pretty too." Now that she was growing it out, it went almost to her shoulders in a cute fluffy layered style.  
"Not like yours, but Nagi said he liked the color, so I guess that's fine."  
I smiled. "So what is going on today? What's all this fuss about?"  
"Senji's surprise." She said as she tugged me out the door.  
I frowned as we went downstairs.  
Senji was pulling his jacket on and Karako glared at him again as he came to kiss me.  
"I told you to be gone." She said.  
He laughed as he looked at her.  
"I had to make my woman breakfast. Otherwise she might never eat today." He said.  
He looked back down at me.  
"I love you baby." He said.  
I smiled as I touched the hand doing up the zipper of his jacket.  
"I love you too."  
He kissed me again before Karako made a motion and Nagi pulled him away from me.  
"Come on boss, you're getting me in trouble too."  
Senji laughed as he grabbed his keys and headed out the door.  
Karako sighed as I watched Senji's car take off.  
"I guess you should eat, since he did make it."  
I nodded and moved into the kitchen to find that he had made enough for us both.  
"Such a stupid fool." She mumbled as we cleaned up.  
"But he's my stupid fool."  
She sighed. "And I guess Nagi is mine."  
I nodded.  
xXx  
The drive to our next destination was short.  
A hair salon.  
Karako led me inside and I frowned.  
"Sorry we're late. Senji screwed up the time by making breakfast." She said to Sherry.  
Clara was there to pull me into a chair and I frowned as a stylist came to me.  
"Can you do that style I picked out for her?"  
"Well...her hair is longer than I thought. You said past her butt, I just didn't think you were serious."  
Clara sighed.  
"I'll get it covered."  
I sighed as the woman went to work on my head.  
"You've got no split ends, that's a great trick. What do you use?" She asked.  
"Nothing." I mumbled. "Just lucky."  
Clara and the other two got their hair done up and I glanced up as Karina came in. She turned at the door to wave Shindo off. He waved at us all before driving away.  
"Sorry I'm late. Shindo got called in to write up a report and the boss wanted to give him some stuff for later since the rest of the station isn't off today." She said.  
Clara nodded. "He should have called Kan."  
"Kan has bigger things on his plate you know." Karako said.  
Clara sighed. "True."  
It did seem like recently Karina had been giving it a shot to accept the guys at the station as 'odd' cops.  
Ever since she had decided to join Senji's team, she had been a bit more open with being a Deadman.  
It was becoming more common to see Deadmen, on both sides of the law.  
xXx  
My hair was pretty nice once it got finished.  
The braids keeping my hair in a straight fall down my back were pretty nice and whatever she had put in my hair smelled wonderful.  
Clara drove us back towards the house and I was a bit more relaxed.  
"So, what do you think about your hair?" Karina asked from the front seat.  
"It...is pretty nice." I said.  
"Good, Clara and I worked on the design with a bit of help from Larissa to keep the style together."  
"And as you probably noticed, Karako took over your under stuff." Clara said.  
I frowned at the woman in question.  
"I did."  
"And you'll hate me more shortly too." She grinned.  
I frowned as Clara pulled into the drive in front of the house and pulled out a bandana as I got out.  
I started to head for the house.  
Clara pulled me to a stop and wrapped the bandana around my eyes.  
"Guys?" I reached for it, but they took my hands to stop me.  
"Just take a second and come with us." Clara said.  
"Go ahead Karina." Karako said.  
"Right."  
I heard her run off.  
I felt the stone path from the house to the complex under my feet.  
We were headed there?  
The door got opened and I was brought inside and pulled directly left.  
When another door was opened and closed, I finally felt the cloth removed and glared at them.  
"Relax, it's for a good cause."  
I turned at Larissa's voice.  
"What are you guys doing?"  
"Make-up and polish." Karina said.  
Karako pushed me into a chair and I looked around.  
We were in one of the empty efficiencies.  
I hadn't realized exactly how big they were.  
Each one was at least the size of our master bedroom and bathroom but with a kitchen along part of a wall as well  
They were quite nice.  
Karina sat at my feet and took one of my hands to start filing my nails.  
Maybe if I did that more often I wouldn't scratch Senji as badly.  
But he liked his scars.  
I sighed as they pondered over exact colors for the make-up until Karako just took the container and pulled out a soft tinted blush and eye shadow in a burnished gold color.  
"With her skin, this will do fine." Karako said.  
Karina began to paint my nails a molten gold color and I frowned.  
"What is going on?"  
"Good lord, you still haven't figured it out?" Larissa asked.  
I stared at her until Karako made me close my eyes to apply the shadow.  
"Excellent." Clara said.  
I opened my eyes to see a dress being held up.  
A wedding dress.  
But not white.  
Shimmering gold, rather like my lingerie in fact.  
It had a solid gold sleeveless bodice that barely covered my breasts, with a sheer, glittering gold fabric creating a higher neck and sleeves down to my wrists. The skirt was a fluffy pale gold with a layer of the solid gold keeping it mostly covered except where it parted in the front to show the yards and yards of fluffy fabric underneath. The sheer fabric had been sewn in small feathers to the solid gold, creating a curtain of glittering gold around the skirt as well.  
Even the hand made ankle boots with the plush insides and a leather soles were golden.  
They intended for me to look like a gold cupcake.  
But it was pretty.  
"What about you guys?"  
"Well, we are your bridesmaids, except Clara, who took on the Maid of Honor position with her husband as Best Man to set this whole thing up with some guidance from Senji." Karina said.  
Larissa pulled out other dresses from the wardrobe that had been pulled in for the occassion.  
She held them up.  
The one Clara was going to be wearing was a subdued glittery silver with gold stitching in a simple full length evening dress style with no sleeves and a higher neckline and the slit in the skirt showed it was lined with the fluffy gold fabric inside and a curtain of the sheer gold kept her dress from being immodest.  
The other two were the same silver with more gold stitching, but the necklines were lower cut and they had a less decorative stitching pattern on the bodices than Clara's.  
They were very pretty too.  
I looked at Larissa. "And you?"  
"Calvin and I are going as we are. I'd say my blue is just fine. He's making sure the boys don't mess anything up with the clothes I made them. Afterward I don't care, but before the wedding I'd like everything in one piece."  
I nodded.  
Karina pulled a can of something from her bag and my fingers were assaulted by cold.  
I pulled away and felt the polish harden like steel.  
"My own personal stuff. I make the polish using normal paint and thinner, add in a mix of high gloss if need be like today, then use regular quick paint setter." She grinned as I stared at the beautiful coating on my nails. "It lasts a couple days at max. But it's really good." She said as she held up the silver tips of her fingers.  
"This is wonderful." I said.  
"It's a hobby. I like to mix my own paints. I actually...did Senji's car." She rubbed her neck.  
I stared. "You did that? The phoenix and crows?"  
She nodded. "Shin said he was taking the car to a friend of his, so the guys didn't question him, but he just brought it to me. It's why it was done so fast. I already had the film painted, I just had to get the car to apply it."  
"That is film?" I frowned.  
"Yeah. I spray out a large sheet of heat film onto my wall and when it dries, it peels off and I can lay it out on the table and paint it. Shin hated when I did it because the house smells like fumes for a couple hours. The landlord threatened to kick us out until we said what I was doing. I had to do it in spurts along the week before they stole the car. That way I could quickly strip and line the car to paint it black again with the matte finish and apply the heat film to the panels. I ended up staying up two days straight to have it finished before Senji could report it missing or stolen and ruin the surprise." She said as they made me stand up.  
Larissa helped me into my dress as they helped each other.  
"You like doing that?" I asked.  
"The painting? Yeah. I love it. Senji doesn't know yet. I've been a bit leery of telling him I did his car and Shin's." She said.  
"You should really tell him." I said. "He'd love it. You could get work in a detail shop easy."  
She shuffled as she stuffed her feet in her silver boots. "Eh? I'm not into working with a group doing that stuff. I like doing bodywork and the paint jobs, but I like doing it by myself. Maybe with a bit of help from Shin when I need a second set of hands. Like the hood of his car would have been much harder by myself."  
I nodded. I could understand that. I didn't want to be a nurse and be forced to heal people. We liked our freedom to choose what we did.  
"Alright, almost time." Karako said.  
Larissa nodded and headed out of the room.  
I stared at them for a moment.  
"Am I really ready for this?" I asked.  
"Yes. You are. You and Senji belong together. No one should ever have the ability to part you two." Clara said.  
I nodded.  
A knock sounded on the door and Karina moved to open it.  
Loki came in and looked at me.  
"You're so beautiful Fe." He said.  
I looked at him.  
"I don't feel all that ready right now though." I said.  
"I know you are." He leaned in to kiss my forehead. "You're my sister and I know you love Senji, so of course you're ready to do this."  
"That's not a reason..." I said.  
"You don't want to marry Senji?" He asked.  
"I do, I just...this is so sudden. To me anyway." I sat in the chair and he knelt in front of me.  
"I know we all kept it a secret pretty well, but Senji wanted it that way. He was planning for this for almost a month now and when you..." Loki took a breath. "He didn't want you to know because I think he was hoping the shock would keep your mind off anything else."  
I nodded. "He's always trying to make me happy."  
"Does he?" Loki stood up.  
I reached for his hand as he held it out to me.  
"More than anything else."  
"Good."  
Loki moved with me to the door as the other three headed out.  
He looked at his watch for a second before standing behind Karina.  
The woman held out a silk flower bouquet and I stared at the gold and silver flowers.  
"Why gold?" I asked.  
"Larissa matched it to your tone and it just kind of stuck. Then she went with the dulled silver for them because it compliments."  
I looked at his black suit.  
"Are the men in tuxedos?" I asked.  
"No. Larissa made their clothes too. Black with silver stitching for everyone but Senji. Gold for him. Trust me, it looks pretty amazing."  
I looked up as Clara stepped forward and took her husbands arm to go down the aisle first.  
I felt very nervous as Loki put his hand on mine where I held his arm.  
"I'm scared Lo." I said softly.  
Karina turned slightly as Karako and Nagi went next.  
"You'll be fine Fenix." She said.  
She took Shindo's arm and I felt Loki brush his hand over mine again before tugging my veil of sheer gold over my head.  
The headpiece had been a simple headband with sheer gold fabric sewn to cover my head like a hood.  
"You'll be alright. Just think of Senji being there at the end." Loki said.  
I nodded as the music changed to a slow, low tune.  
It was something I recognized.  
The old song Loki used to hum to me when I was scared. The one Senji had hummed in prison to calm his own nerves and mine by luck.  
I took a deep breath as I stepped out with my brother.  
He kept me steady as we walked.  
I couldn't even think straight.  
Amazing was an understatement.  
Senji looked more than amazing.  
His pants were plain black, but his jacket was lined with gold like my bodice and the buttons were gold. There were delicate gold embroidered feathers down both sleeves and on his collar. His shirt was black silk with gold dusting and the tie had embroidered feathers in black along its gold length.  
His normally messy hair was combed, but not slicked back with gel. Just combed back and held by some kind of almost hairspray like stuff.  
It looked soft, like I could run my fingers through it.  
I realized what it was as I came closer.  
For the first time since I'd known him, he had actually conditioned his hair.  
It gave the short strands a natural fluff as they stayed spiked. They had misted his hair to keep it slightly slicked down.  
I felt more than nervous as Loki stopped in front of him.  
I couldn't speak as Domon spoke up from in front of us.  
Senji had gotten his old mentor, his father figure, to marry us.  
I took a deep breath as Loki handed me off to Senji.  
I barely heard as Domon spoke, too busy staring at Senji.  
He just looked so different that I was startled.  
I caught myself and spoke when I needed to. Luckily it was only once near the end.  
Senji fully turned to me and held my hand up to put a glittering gold band with diamonds just like my engagement ring on my finger. This time the opposite hand.  
Senji had told me when he put the ring on me that in his family, as far back as he could remember being told as a little boy, the women of his family wore their engagement rings on their non-dominant hand, with the wedding ring on the dominant hand.  
All customs were different, but I liked the way each hand now had the same look.  
I took the other ring from Domon and put it on Senji's right hand.  
I noted the lack of the bladed rings and my own fingers felt bare without them on me.  
Karako wouldn't let me wear them this morning.  
As Domon announced us, Senji flipped the veil back on my head to uncover my face.  
He stared down at me for a moment before kissing me.  
Gently, but fully.  
As he pulled away I leaned into him.  
He put his arm around me and we faced the small crowd.  
The entire crew was there, dressed nicely in their best clothes.  
I saw several of the other officers from the station, but a lot were still missing due to work.  
All told, our wedding only held about twenty people.  
Some Deadmen from the prison who had known us both, police from Senji's old life, my brother and the doctor and his daughter, and a couple new friends.  
Small, but family.  
It was quick as the tables were pulled to the front of the room and the chairs gathered around them so that everyone could look at each other.  
Karako and Nagi came to us with the others in our party.  
"Come on, we need pictures for this!" She said.  
Domon took pictures for us of everyone, just the women, just the men, and just Senji and I and each of the couples.  
It was nice that it worked out that way.  
"So how does it feel to be Mrs. Kiyomasa now?" Clara asked me.  
I took a breath. "Let me get used to it first."  
"Come on, I'm surprised you weren't already calling yourself that for months now." Karina said.  
"I...never really thought about having a last name. I'm still just Fenix." I said.  
Senji pulled me close.  
"My Phoenix." He said. "I do like the sound of Fenix Kiyomasa."  
I sat down in the chair he brought me to.  
"I also love the dress." He said as he sat beside me.  
The tables everyone had pulled together already had platters of food.  
Steaks likely cooked by Senji, pasta salad that I guessed Kan had done along with the rolls, regular salad that Senji said Ganta and Jude did up, steamed broccoli and cauliflower and squash that Nagi took ownership of, and Shindo covered the multi layered pudding and graham cracker individual bowls that were kept chilled in large bowls of ice.  
I stayed quiet as my brother stood up from the table across from me.  
"I spent a long time of my life living with my parents but being the one who took care of Fenix. When I turned eighteen and moved out I feared leaving her behind. That fear was realized a year later when I found out she was abandoned at school because our parents forgot about her. I never let her live with them from the time she was nine. When she was ten, the paperwork finally came through for me to legally take custody of her. It was easily the best day of my life thus far. I knew my sister would never want for anything again with me. We had a good number of years while I was working for a family shop during her school hours.  
"Then the quake hit when I was twenty four and I gave up my life to make sure my baby sister survived. This little girl was my life, my baby, everything I had that meant a damn to me. I was infected with the same Branch of Sin Virus she was, but my healing took a bit too long. She buried me alive believing I was dead and survived on her own just like I taught her. I spent the past ten years searching for my baby sister. I knew she was alive, and I was going to find her. I made some good friends and they helped me along the way, giving me the opportunity to find her again.  
"In prison. When I had first seen that video, I was scared to death. That was my baby sister up against a ruthless fighter undefeated. Crow killed my sister on accident and I swear I just about died again myself. And then when he held her until she came back to life, I knew I had to come and get her from that hellhole.  
"Little did I know that the same man who had killed her was also the one man who loved her more than me. He kept her safe in there, got her free so much easier than I ever could have, and unknowingly sent her back to me. I'm grateful to Senji for taking care of her when she needed it most, and now I can only ask that Crow take care of my baby for the rest of her life too."  
Senji nodded as Loki sat back down.  
I wiped away tears as Senji held me close.  
Loki did forgive Senji for the accident in the Carnival.  
No one could deny that Senji had just about lost it when he nearly lost me.  
I looked down at my plate as Senji stood up.  
"I'll always take care of Fenix. I never really believed that I could find someone I could love until I saw her wandering the halls of Deadman Wonderland. Then I knew it was a bullet to my heart when in all the fear she had in there, of everyone dangerous, myself worst of all, she came to me for comfort. No one came to me for comfort." His old police crew laughed. "I'm just not that kind of guy. But she did and it tore me up. I knew I found a light in the dark. A bright flaming Phoenix that I had protected when it was scared of the dark.  
"Fenix became my reason for winning. I wanted to be able to protect her through fear alone in that hell. Even now, I hear Deadmen who never even got caught fear the Crow from Carnival Corpse. When I finally got free after we brought the place down, I couldn't wait to find her again.  
"I found her, and all my old friends. People I thought I had lost and she and her brother brought me back to them. I'm glad to have friends and family like you all. Ones I can count on to watch my back like I watch yours and to take care of my treasure when I'm not able to." Senji said. He sat back down beside me and I held his hand.  
Everyone held up their cups after the alcohol was poured.  
Even to Jude and Ganta. One glass wouldn't hurt those boys. Besides, they weren't going anywhere.  
They celebrated us and we all talked and ate for a while.  
"Oi, dance." Sherry said as she dimmed the lights halfway and turned on the stereo she had set up earlier.  
I shook my head until Senji scooted his chair back and held out his hand to me.  
I didn't know how to dance.  
I looked up at him.  
"Just follow my lead." He said.  
I nodded and he started moving.  
I managed not to step on his feet, but I almost tripped myself up twice before he stopped.  
Karako pulled Nagi out and that encouraged others.  
Loki did a dance with Kari before she sat down laughing at how bad she was.  
I sat in my chair and watched everyone having some kind of fun.  
Karina came to sit beside us as Shindo gave up trying to dance with her.  
"Hey." She said.  
We both looked at her.  
"So...you know your paint job on the car?"  
Senji nodded.  
"Well...I did it." She said.  
Senji made a huffed laugh. "Really? That is pretty amazing." He said.  
"I thought about not telling you, but Fenix said I should."  
"Yeah. I was thinking about getting custom paint jobs for all the vehicles we'll be getting for the company. Something good and memorable. Like the searing on the jackets. That emblem. Since it's kind of like our company logo."  
She nodded. "I could do that. When you get them anyway."  
He nodded.  
I stayed leaning against Senji as we watched our friends.  
I looked up as Cain and Rei came to stand in front of us.  
"Can we talk to you both, privately?" Cain asked.  
Senji frowned but nodded.  
I stood up and he took my hand as we walked towards one of the offices.  
Rei closed the door behind us.  
He moved to stand beside Cain.  
"We debated on telling you both, but Rei decided we should since it might affect how you form the teams when we have enough people." Cain said.  
Senji held up his hand.  
"I've known for a while now." He said.  
Rei sighed. "And you don't care?"  
Senji shrugged and I frowned.  
"Why should I? You are both adults and know your own selves better than anyone else."  
I looked at them as Cain sighed.  
"Good. I was just worried how you might take it. I...was willing to quit if it meant Rei could stay on the team."  
"What are you talking about?" I asked. "You can't quit. You're both part of this crew."  
Senji smiled. "No one is quitting baby."  
"Good." I frowned.  
Cain looked at me.  
"I thought you might have guessed first, but I suppose it doesn't much matter to you." He said.  
Rei took his hand.  
"We're together." He said.  
I frowned until it clicked.  
"You're both gay?"  
They nodded.  
Senji wrapped his arm around me.  
"And you thought we might get upset?" I asked.  
They nodded again.  
"Why? You're family. That means we support each other." I said. "As long as you two are happy..."  
"We are." Cain said. "I...didn't really think about it being an issue since my tastes are a bit obscure. I normally don't go for anyone like Rei. I used to just prefer guys more like the boss actually, but less terrifying and insane. But I saw him and just couldn't get why that stupid messy hair just pissed me off. Or why his habit of jumping the second floor railing scared the shit out of me."  
I nodded. Love did crazy things.  
"And I had never looked at anyone before, given how volatile my Branch is. I was scared of hurting them. Turns out, Cain is pretty immune to my skill." Rei said. "He's the first person to be able to help me tame my skills and the first who ever admitted to liking my off kilter personality. I know I'm a bit much to handle, really."  
"You're like a damn Energizer Bunny most days." Senji sighed. "Just watching you exhausts me sometimes."  
Rei grinned. "See, Cain isn't like that. He is the first man to ever keep up with me. It's something I've been searching for in both a relationship and partnership."  
Cain ruffled his spiky blond hair. "We just wanted to let you guys know. If it ever affects the team, you can split us up."  
I frowned. "It won't. I'll make sure of it."  
Rei smiled. "Thanks Fenix." He moved in to hug me.  
Cain did as well.  
"You guys really are the best." They said.  
Senji shrugged. "We all have our weird habits. Mine is being unable to look at women straight, Fenix can't stand the dark without me there, you two happen to swing for each other. Who cares?"  
He turned for the door.  
"Thanks for understanding boss." Cain said as he headed out the door.  
Rei nodded as he moved to catch up.  
We watched them for a moment.  
There were tiny things they did that most people wouldn't notice that gave them away, but they didn't hide it either.  
We watched the party for a little bit.  
Senji leaned down to whisper to me.  
"Shall we go home and celebrate by ourselves?" He asked.  
I blushed, knowing what he meant.  
I nodded.  
He started to lead me to the doors.  
Clara stopped us.  
"Hold up. First, she has to throw the bouquet."  
I frowned.  
She held it up and motioned to the small group of single women.  
I sighed as I took it and put my back to them.  
I tossed it behind me over my head and headed for the door.  
Senji pulled it open and I glanced back to see Karina holding the silk flowers.  
The police clapped Shindo on the back.  
"Better get moving."  
Senji laughed as the door closed and he held out his arm to me.  
It was just cold enough that I leaned in close to him as we hurried towards the house.  
"We can be as wild as we want tonight." He said.  
"What about Karako and Nagi?"  
"They decided they want to finally move into one of the apartments." Senji said. "They'll move their stuff tomorrow though."  
I nodded.  
Our house was empty again. With everyone in the complex, it was going to be lonely, but at least we had good neighbors. I smiled.  
Senji opened the house door and we shivered as we came inside.  
xXx  
I had expected a bit of embarrassment as Senji pulled my dress off.  
But the smoldering look in his eyes was more than I'd thought he'd show.  
"Okay, this is much better than that thing you wore to seduce me in prison."  
I blushed as he fingered the bows at my hips.  
He tugged on the strings as he leaned down to kiss me.  
I worked on undoing his buttons as he barely left the panties tied on.  
Any wrong moves and they'd be off me in a second.  
Senji shrugged out of his shirts and I pulled the white undershirt Karako had made him put on that morning from where it was tucked into his pants.  
I slipped my hands under his shirt against his skin.  
He groaned as I eased his shirt up.  
"Such a tease." He gripped the hem and yanked his shirt off.  
I kept my hands against his skin.  
"So warm." I mumbled.  
"Am I?" He frowned.  
"Yes. You're hot, sexy, and dangerous to my ability to think."  
He laughed as he pulled me against him and leaned down, forcing me to tilt my head back.  
"Then don't think." He kissed me.  
I let him push me onto the bed and my panties came untied at my left hip.  
He ran the backs of his right fingers down my left side and I shivered at the feel of the simple gold band on his finger running over my skin.  
He was officially mine now.  
And I his.  
Legally and completely.  
He tucked his hand under my thigh and tugged me to open to him.  
I spread my thighs and he settled between them, rubbing his hardness against my barely covered flesh.  
It felt more than good.  
"My sweet little Fenix." He said softly.  
He leaned down to kiss me.  
I loved it when he did.  
Even in front of others. He might get embarrassed over it, but I liked his public claiming of me.  
I moved my hands to his hips and he lifted up enough for me to push his pants down a little.  
It also gave me the leverage to push him onto his back.  
I was glad we finally had a huge bed since we'd moved into our own home.  
It gave us both space to work with.  
And I had been wanting to do this for a long time.  
He didn't fight me as I pushed him.  
"I suppose I can give in occasionally." He grinned.  
"You'll like it." I hoped.  
I leaned over him and kissed him.  
He didn't even notice as I pulled his old cuffs from the bedside table.  
Not until I held them up.  
"No." He said.  
I frowned.  
"It's not that I don't love the thought behind it, I do, but not tonight." He said as he took them and set them aside again.  
I nodded.  
"Some other time baby." He reached up to brush his hand over my cheek and run his thumb over my lip. "I promise I'll be happy to let you do it."  
"Alright." I leaned down to kiss him.  
He let me scoot away from him and I moved to straddle his thighs.  
Senji let me shove his pants off and he nudged them to the floor.  
I looked down at his length.  
He was bigger than I always thought.  
He never let me look at him like this.  
I changed position to make him spread his legs a little.  
Damn Karako and her teasing. She had gotten me to look at a book of things to pleasure a man, and now I wanted to actually try some.  
She'd meant it as a joke since I obviously already kept Senji pretty happy.  
He looked down at me.  
"You look unsure baby." He said.  
"I...I've never done this before."  
"I know." He moved to sit up a little, bracing his arms behind him. "Touch me. I'll be sure to let you know if I do or don't like things."  
I blushed slightly.  
I reached to hold his length in both hands.  
He was hard, yet smooth and soft too.  
"You can stroke me." He said.  
I nodded and moved my hands over his length, applying just a slight amount of pressure.  
"Tighter."  
I gradually tightened my hold on him until I just barely saw a hint of discomfort on his face.  
Finding his limits was arousing.  
He shuddered when I changed speeds.  
I tested until I found just the right point that had him tilting his head back.  
"Fuck." He groaned. "That's perfect."  
I smiled.  
He looked ready to break.  
I leaned down as a bead formed on the crown.  
I touched my tongue to it and his head snapped forward.  
"Baby, you don't have to do that." He said.  
"I want to." I flushed.  
He groaned. "You'll kill me." He mumbled.  
"Not yet." I said as I leaned back down.  
His taste was something else.  
Salty sweet. Slightly thick.  
I put my mouth over him and one of his hands went to tangle in my hair.  
I stroked him until his body was tense and I licked at him.  
But his resistance was pretty damn good.  
I took part of his length in my mouth and sucked on the head of his cock as my hands continued to stroke him in exactly the way he liked.  
"Fenix." He groaned as he spilled into my mouth.  
I swallowed.  
It was easily the most erotic thing yet to see him do.  
He collapsed back on the bed.  
"I'll have my revenge later." He mumbled.  
"Promise?"  
He pulled me up his body to kiss me.  
"Definitely."  
He rolled us back over and undid the other string.  
He pulled the scrap of fabric off me and then tugged the top off.  
It felt almost new again as he stared down at me with such fire in his eyes.  
Senji reached to stroke me and I gripped his shoulders.  
"See, the torment is a lot to bear isn't it?" He growled.  
I couldn't think straight as I nodded.  
He leaned down to nip my collarbone and my hands moved to tangle in his hair as he teased my skin.  
I moaned as he finally came up to kiss me and thrust into me.  
It felt so good.  
I ran my shorter nails down his arms as he thrust hard and fast.  
He adjusted the angle by lifting my hips and holding my legs up by hooking his arms under my knees.  
I reached to cover his hands with mine as I stared up at him with hazy vision.  
"Senji." I could feel my nails biting into the back of his hands as I cried his name.  
He continued to move me, his brow tight as he focused on pushing me over the edge as many times as he could.  
I felt like every nerve was lit up after maybe the fourth time.  
Every single touch felt too sensitive.  
He held himself over me and braced his arms by my shoulders to brush my cheek with his hand and tangle the other in my hair.  
"I'll always love you Fenix."  
His gray eyes were so soft as I shuddered under the feeling of him moving in me still.  
He felt tense, ready to go over the edge himself.  
I was a limp pile on the bed.  
I was never going to be able to keep up with this man.  
"I love you Senji, forever." I whispered.  
He leaned down to kiss me as he finally spilled into me again.  
It was just enough to bring me with him.  
He groaned as he moved to lay beside me.  
He was quiet other than his breathing for a moment.  
I turned to snuggle up to him and felt almost too weak to move.  
He pulled me close and pulled the blanket over us.  
"I'm so glad you're finally mine in name too." He said.  
I closed my eyes as I rested my head on his shoulder.  
"Me too." I mumbled.  
He stroked his left hand over my cheek as his right held me against him and stayed warm on my hip.  
Not trying to stimulate my poor body anymore, but just giving me the warmth of his hold.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**  
I heard laughing from downstairs as I woke up.  
I looked at the clock on the bedside table.  
It was almost noon.  
I had never slept in that late.  
Not since before Loki and I were separated.  
I moved sore, tired muscles to get up and get dressed.  
I swear Senji was insatiable.  
Why was it always the women who seemed to be the exhausted ones after a marathon of sex?  
He had let me sleep a bit after our first bout, and then woke me up about midnight with kisses for round two, and about five hours ago for a quick round three.  
I reached for the handle on the door and eased it open.  
I held the rail after I pulled my hair into a loose, messy bun.  
Senji had long undid the lovely braiding.  
I carefully moved downstairs.  
Most of our Edge crew were in the kitchen with Senji as I moved to the doorway.  
Senji came to hold me and get me into a chair.  
"Good grief Senji." Karako said. "You think you might have killed her."  
"Like she didn't enjoy every second as much as I did." He grinned as I blushed.  
Cain laughed from across the table.  
"Still boss, at least try to keep our mascot in better shape."  
I put my head on the table as my face flamed.  
"You all suck." I mumbled.  
They laughed and I felt Senji pull me upright as he put a plate in front of me.  
"Lunch." He said.  
I nodded as he moved back to the stove to hand Cain the plates from the counter.  
The drinks were already distributed and Rei got me a glass of ice water.  
I looked down at my plate of steak bits and fries and sautéed slices of zucchini and squash.  
Everyone settled in to eat as Senji sat beside me.  
"You alright baby?"  
I nodded. "Just tired."  
He sighed. "Are they right though? Was I too rough on you?"  
I heard Karako sputter as she was drinking.  
"Senji, we're trying to eat." Nagi said.  
"Oh shut up. Like you wouldn't worry too." Senji didn't even look at them.  
I shook my head to his question.  
"I'm fine, really." I leaned against him. "You are right."  
He grinned as I ate the tender bits of steak.  
He was such a good cook.  
"See, she's fine." He said.  
"So what are you doing today?" Ganta asked.  
Senji sighed.  
"We have a request from down at Loki's old station about a Deadman who uses blood whips like Karina. So I was thinking Karako and Nagi could head down and test the range of the gear Sherry designed for us."  
"Well, I did make it to tap into any nearby source of power to send the signal through any source of connection, be it phone, internet, or electrical line."  
I frowned.  
"I'm still working on the wireless version that will simply send signals directly to each other."  
"Isn't that kind of advanced?" I asked.  
"Yeah well, companies aren't going to want this public. It basically negates the need for cell and internet companies. I have the connection here to the internet, but I can send any information I want to the pads I built. They are a bit bulky compared to the iPad, but they have a custom interface that is configurable even by Cain and his anti-tech self."  
Cain nodded. "The thing is pretty sweet Fenix. She's redone some coding or whatever and now I can even play solitaire on it." He grinned.  
Rei and Sherry sighed.  
"I had to build my own power source for these things since they are so energy efficient they use up next to nothing from the battery of the old iPod Touch I used as a base design. So now they are rigged to actually run on nothing more powerful than static electricity. Human movement is enough to charge these batteries just by holding the two points at each side and walking."  
I was impressed she had managed to design that without me ever knowing.  
Our team was full of impressive people.  
"I also had to specially rig Sparky's to not get fried by him. And his headpiece is synced to his pad so I've been having him and Cain test the camera and audio by running the grounds. It is working pretty sweet, but the range isn't much more than the city, which pisses me off. But I think I may have found a solution by using Jude's off comment about pulling some of his energy from the air around him for his skills. I'm trying to find a way to tap into the natural energy of the world at large in order to carry the feed. If this works, it'll be a breakthrough in human technology."  
I nodded.  
"Anyway, Karako and Nagi will head down there, Cain and Rei are going to be working with my old crew today on a drug bust that they think is being led by a Deadman." Senji said. "Sherry will be hard at work as you've heard. But you and I have some shopping to do today."  
"Shopping?" I frowned.  
"We need to go by our contracted construction company and see about getting a garage built for all the vehicles we'll be having. And then we need to go and actually get a couple ordered. I'm thinking I'll have to get with Makina on that bit. And I also got the guys here to build up a feasible list of things for their rooms since Cain and Rei have a bed and dresser, nothing else, Sherry keeps complaining about her wobbly desk not holding her monitor steady, Ganta has the bare basics as well, and Jude is still in a sleeping bag on the floor."  
"What are those two going to be doing today?"  
"Schoolwork." Ganta sighed. I nodded. And it being Monday, Jude had caught a ride with Clara to his school. As per Senji's agreement with them.  
"We'll be picking Jude up after we swing by the construction company since it'll be close to his time to get out." Senji said as he and Rei cleared the table.  
I sighed and headed upstairs to change.  
Senji came up and watched me.  
I pulled on a warm skirt and loose sweater.  
"You sure you're up for today?" He asked.  
I nodded.  
"I'm really alright Senji." I said.  
He sighed.  
We headed back down.  
xXx  
The construction company took a bit longer than we'd thought, but Senji was quite satisfied with the design.  
We had to park to get Jude and I knew something was wrong.  
Senji held my hand as we walked to the office.  
The woman at the desk looked up at us.  
"We're here for Jude." Senji said.  
She nodded. "You're going to have to talk with the headmaster with him."  
I frowned as she led us back and I pulled away from Senji as I saw Jude on a bench with a bag of ice on his knuckles and several scrapes and ugly bruises forming.  
The boy glaring at him from across the room didn't look much better.  
I knelt in front of Jude.  
"Hon what happened?" I asked.  
He turned away from me until Senji stood where he was facing.  
"It was just a fight." Jude mumbled.  
I cut my thumb and he took the bag from his hand for me to heal the broken joints.  
What had he hit so hard he could have broken all four knuckles?  
I ran my thumb over the bruises forming on his face, but I knew there were dozens more forming all over his body.  
I was never going to be able to get them all from the outside.  
I held my thumb up to his mouth.  
"I'm fine." He turned away.  
"Do not hurt her boy." Senji glared at him.  
He flinched as faced me again and licked the blood from my cut. My wound healed up as my blood moved into him to heal his damage. Just a tiny bit that would dissipate into his own blood afterward.  
The office door was opened and Senji took his arm.  
He winced as a bruise was pushed on, but didn't fight back.  
I frowned as I looked up at Jude as he hung his head and refused to look anyone in the eye.  
"You are Senji Kiyomasa?" The older man asked as he stood up from his desk.  
Senji let Jude's arm go to step forward.  
"Yes. What happened?"  
"Well, just before the bell rang, he and Sato got into a fight. We had some other kids state that Sato started the fight, but a couple said otherwise. The video does show Sato making the first comment, but Jude here swung first, which puts him as the initiator."  
I frowned as I reached up to brush Jude's bangs from his face.  
His messy hair was getting long.  
He didn't look at me, but he did lean into my touch.  
"I wasn't going to do it." He mumbled.  
"Do what?" I asked.  
Senji turned to face him.  
"Tell us what happened Jude."  
Jude sighed.  
"I tried to ignore him, really I swear Fenix, I did." He actually looked down at me. "I didn't care if he called me a freak, I know I'm a Deadman. But then...he said you guys should have stayed in prison and I just..." He leaned down to put his head on my shoulder. "I couldn't stop myself. He doesn't know what it was like in there and he is the shit who would have probably laughed as he watched the Carnivals and then he said..."  
He pulled away from me.  
"What?" Senji sounded almost gentle as he touched Jude's shoulder.  
"He said all Deadmen were killers by nature and the women worse because they were probably whores too." Jude said. He shook as he clenched his fists.  
Senji sighed as I pulled Jude close.  
The older man sighed.  
He moved to the door and motioned for the other boy to come in.  
I held Jude as he looked angry enough to kill.  
"Sato, tell me again what happened." The older man said.  
"Like I said. That freak hit me because I told the truth."  
Senji turned to face him.  
"That all Deadmen should be killed." He said.  
Sato nodded smugly. Hell, I wanted to hit him.  
"And bitches like her are worse than the rest because they are whores too."  
Senji clenched his fist.  
"You know, before I was thrown in prison, I was a cop. I spent years protecting this city." Senji cut his arm with his ring and formed a small scythe. Sato paled. "These blades took out too many little shit punks to bother counting. Not once did I kill with my skills. Until I went into Deadman Wonderland and had to fight to the death for my own freedom again. You know who pitted us against each other?"  
I watched the boy stumble away from Senji as he drew the scythe back in.  
"A little shit rich boy like you. And dozens of other fat bastards who thought it was amusing to watch us fight and then get torn into for science. Fenix and I survived that. We helped tear that hellhole down so that kids like Jude never have to see what it is like to have to fight to the death, knowing if you leave your opponent alive, it's worse than the mercy of killing them." Senji said.  
The older man nodded at his words. He'd obviously read up on the stuff, having Jude in his school.  
"I don't care if you think we're freaks for being different, but if you ever call my innocent, healer, wife that again, I can have you locked up. I think you forget that even verbal threats like that are still considered a penalty on your record. And starting a fight like with Jude will also be marked on your record. The police have started up making note of things like this, for just the instance that one of us are killed by a little shit like you."  
Sato collapsed against the wall.  
"By the way, go online and look up the released Carnival videos. Some of the fighters enjoyed them, but see Crow's fights. And just know, that Crow is an innocent man defending himself. Woodpecker was innocent. Phoenix was innocent. Game Fowl was innocent. Owl was too. And dozens of others who were killed by people worse than common murderers."  
Senji faced the older man again.  
"I can only assume Jude isn't going to get a repercussion for defending himself and us?"  
The older man shook his head. "No, I understand why he would do it. Your wife is a very sweet woman from the looks of it and I can understand why Jude would want to defend her. Sato will have detention for the remainder of the month and it will go on his school record as well."  
Senji nodded. "Thank you."  
"Of course, I'll still have to mark Jude's for the fight too, but he was the defendant in this case, so it is not such a bad mark."  
I sighed.  
Senji thanked him and shook his hand as I turned to lead Jude out.  
It wasn't until we were almost to the car that Jude hugged Senji.  
"I'm sorry I dragged you guys down here."  
Senji hugged him back.  
"It's alright kid. It's what we're here for. You're one of our family and we care."  
Jude buried his face in Senji's shoulder.  
For a second, I thought he had passed out.  
"Thanks dad." He mumbled.  
It took Senji off guard, but he put his hand on Jude's head.  
Jude stepped back as he realized what he'd said.  
"Sorry it just...came out." He looked down.  
I moved to hug him.  
"It's good Jude."  
"It's just...I do see you guys like that." He said. "My own parents didn't want me when I came into my power and so, I was tossed around. And then you guys..."  
Senji ruffled his shaggy brown hair.  
"I don't mind if you see me as your father, just expect me to treat you like a son." Jude nodded as Senji unlocked the car.  
We got in before Senji turned to look at him.  
"Do you want it?" He asked. "We can get the papers filled out."  
Jude looked up at us both from the back seat.  
"You...mean it?"  
I nodded.  
He looked almost like a child as he nodded.  
Senji smiled at him.  
"Alright, we'll get it set up. Clara can help find the right stuff for us." He said as he pulled his phone out.  
I turned to look at Jude.  
"You don't...mind being called mother? After..." I started.  
I shook my head. "I've thought of you as one of my boys for a while now. And Cain and Rei and even Ganta. But if you want us to really be your family, I am happy with that."  
Senji spoke to Clara as Jude nodded.  
"Thanks...mom." He said.  
I reached back to take his hand.  
"Just remember, when you're the oldest child, you have to take care of the younger siblings."  
"Are you two..."  
"No, but we will."  
Senji hung up.  
"Clara will have the papers when she gets home, so we'll swing by and fill them out. She'll handle the rest." Senji said.  
I nodded.  
"First, shopping." Senji grinned.  
He was far too amused by that activity.  
xXx  
I should have known it wasn't going to be simple.  
The shopping had been done in two hours, most of it having to go through the list and pick out items for everyone.  
Jude showed a surprisingly good sense of taste when it came to style and he didn't like being told to not be frugal.  
Senji had found out that he had a lot more money than it had first seemed. Tamaki had been skewing the numbers from the start.  
He had more than enough to get this whole company off the ground and then some.  
We had to get everything delivered tomorrow.  
I looked at the couple sitting on the couch.  
Jude's real parents.  
They hadn't wanted their child, but they wouldn't sign the papers to make him not theirs either.  
"It's alright boss." Jude said. "I turn eighteen in a couple months. It'll be easier then."  
"That's not the point Jude. They don't want you, we do. No one should be a parent if they don't want a kid." Senji said.  
Jude sighed from where he sat on the floor beside the chair Senji was in.  
Clara shuffled the papers.  
"He's a freak, why the hell would you want him? A grown kid on top of that? You two are way too young to raise anything." Jude's father said.  
Senji glared. "I've been helping raise kids not much younger than myself since my parents died and I lived in an orphanage. I'd think I'm more than qualified to adopt Jude."  
"Still, it's just weird."  
"Just sign the goddamn papers." I snapped as I headed for the kitchen.  
I heard as Senji got up and followed me.  
He pulled me against him and I sighed.  
"It'll be alright baby." He said.  
I felt another hand touch my shoulder and looked at Jude.  
"Really, they can't take me away because I'm over sixteen, and once I turn eighteen they aren't needed to sign the papers. I'll still be your kid Fenix."  
I sighed.  
This was so much more stressful than it needed to be.  
"Are you sure?" I asked.  
"Absolutely." Jude grinned. "I'll still be at the complex."  
Senji sighed.  
We moved back to the living room.  
The papers still hadn't been signed.  
"It's alright Clara. Just wait until he turns eighteen and file it anyway." Senji said.  
Clara nodded and tucked the papers into the folder and put it in her briefcase.  
We headed out to the car and I got in without a word.  
They got in after me and we drove back to the house.  
Jude headed for the complex.  
"I'm going to see how everyone is doing." He said.  
I nodded as Senji and I headed into our house.  
He went to start dinner and I laid on the couch.  
xXx  
I woke to the door bursting open and Senji being pinned down by Domon and Momoi and cuffed by Shindo.  
The three men held him down as my brother came to me.  
"Fenix, I'm sorry this will hurt, but it's the only way your body will take it." He said.  
I frowned as I started to sit up.  
He pinned both my hand in one of his as he bit his thumb to make it bleed.  
He put his hand under my shirt on my stomach and his blood knifed into me.  
I couldn't move from the pain of his blood reworking mine.  
I cried as I felt my own body adjust to what he had done.  
I was never going to have children.  
He had taken even the chance to use any of the options Sherry had found me.  
Loki's blood had coded my own DNA to remove my ovaries. They were no longer pieces of me and my system attacked them to break them down and remove them from my body.  
He stepped away as I just laid on the couch, in pain, crying.  
He leaned down to kiss my cheek.  
"You'll forgive me soon enough. I won't risk you dying again." He said.  
He moved for the door as Shindo undid the cuffs on Senji.  
Senji shoved up from the floor, using his Deadman strength to push his friends away as he moved to me.  
He knelt beside the couch.  
"Baby? What the fuck did he do to you?"  
I couldn't speak still.  
I reached to grip his shirt as I balled up.  
His friends left the house with slightly uneasy looks.  
Senji glared at them.  
"It is a good thing, I promise." Domon said.  
"Just leave us alone." Senji snapped.  
They closed the door and Senji moved to pick me up.  
The movement made it hurt worse.  
I dug my fingers into his arm.  
He sat on the couch, holding me tight in a more comfortable position as I gritted out what Loki had done.  
We sat like that for almost an hour before the pain died down.  
An alarm went off in the kitchen.  
"Does it still hurt?" He asked.  
I shook my head.  
I pushed away from him and laid on the couch.  
He moved to the kitchen again as the front door opened again.  
Senji stood in the doorway with his scythes already forming.  
Cain stopped in the doorway.  
"Holy shit. You scared the life out of me boss." He stepped inside and the rest of our crew followed.  
Karako and Nagi looked exhausted.  
Senji withdrew the blades.  
Rei frowned as he looked at me.  
"Fenix?"  
Karako and Sherry both came to the couch.  
"What's the matter Fenix?" Karako asked.  
I turned away from them.  
Senji slammed his hand on the counter in the kitchen.  
The guys looked at the doorway warily.  
Sherry touched my arm as Jude knelt beside the couch.  
"Really Fenix, what's the problem? We'll fix it." Sherry said.  
"This isn't something you can fix." Senji sounded angry as his voice was more raised than I'd ever heard him when not shouting at people.  
Cain moved to the kitchen.  
"What is going on boss?"  
Senji pushed past him.  
He moved to me.  
"Please let me go kill him. He'll just come back anyway. It'll make me feel better at least."  
"Loki did something to her?" Karako frowned.  
Senji started for the door.  
"No." I mumbled. "He means well."  
"He fucking hurt you Nix. No brother does that and means well."  
I shook at his raised voice.  
I looked up at Rei as the man moved behind the couch to look at me.  
"Keep him here." I said.  
Rei frowned as he looked at Senji grabbing his jacket.  
"Please Rei." I mumbled.  
He nodded and moved towards Senji as the door started to open.  
I flinched as Rei charged enough through himself to drop Senji.  
Cain hurried over to pick Senji up and carried him back towards the middle of the room.  
Nagi sat beside my head.  
"What is it that Loki did that Senji is so pissed about?" He asked.  
I turned to look at Nagi.  
"Loki altered my body and Branch to remove my ability to ever have children."  
Karako gasped. "After the hell you went through?"  
I closed my eyes.  
"He's right though. As long as I have ovaries, I'll still run the risk of getting pregnant and if my body tries to fight that again, I could die from internal blood loss. My own body would kill me. So he prevented that from ever happening again."  
"Still isn't right." Senji muttered from where Cain and Rei were keeping him in place.  
Nagi sighed. "I can see that he meant well, but he didn't think ahead enough to imagine you might be able to use alternate methods before such a disastrous event."  
I nodded.  
My phone began to buzz in my skirt pocket.  
I pulled it free to answer.  
"Hello?" I mumbled.  
"I'm so sorry Fenix. I had no idea he was going to do that to you." Kari said.  
I started to speak.  
"I yelled at him quite a bit since he came over and told me what he did. He really does feel bad, but that he did the right thing. I just can't believe he would have done that. I'm so sorry."  
"It's fine." I said.  
"No it isn't, had I not done something horrible to you too, I'd feel even worse."  
I frowned. "What?"  
"That night you lost your baby, when Loki and I removed him, I also took one of your ovaries. It's why you hurt so much. I thought...maybe if I could figure out exactly what caused the rejection, I could fix it without this." She said. "I've kept it in a jar of solution since then and it has repeatedly produced an egg every day. I must have cut it from you at just the right time. The healing seems to be keeping it in a continuous state..."  
I blanked out as she kept describing possible reasons for it to still be functioning outside me.  
I looked at Senji.  
All any of those methods required was an egg from me and sperm from him.  
Kari's stupid curiosity had hurt at the time, but unknowingly saved my brother from Senji repeatedly killing him to vent frustration.  
"Fenix? Are you mad at me?" She sounded worried.  
"No...I'm happy." I said. "You and your stupid curiosity just helped."  
"I wanted to ask you if you would let me use your eggs to possibly work out a cure for Deadmen."  
I frowned.  
"We don't need that. There is nothing wrong with us."  
"I'm not meaning that kind of cure, but for some that would be useful."  
"No."  
"Then please let me research your healing to try and...I don't know, cure cancer?"  
"That I can do. And Kari?"  
"Yes?"  
"Save some of those eggs for me."  
She sighed and her voice went soft.  
"Absolutely. Thanks to being able to experiment with your eggs, I might just be able to unlock what it is that makes you have your gifts."  
I had a feeling Loki knew already. With the way he used his own blood to reprogram mine.  
I looked at Senji again.  
"Still won't let me kill him?" He asked.  
"Maybe once." I said with a smile. "But we can still have kids of our own."  
He frowned.  
Cain and Rei looked pretty confused too.  
I moved to sit up.  
I used Karako as a support to stand up.  
I stumbled slightly and Senji pushed up.  
He was about as unsteady on his feet.  
"Come on you two." Cain moved to pull Senji's arm over his shoulder and wrapped his arm around Senji's back to help him into the kitchen as Karako and Nagi helped me to sit beside him.  
Ganta and Jude started to pull dinner from the oven.  
"Is this done Senji?" Jude motioned to the roast.  
Senji nodded.  
I leaned against him as the boys and Rei and Cain pulled dinner to the table.  
"So how can you still have kids?" Sherry asked.  
I started to explain what Kari had done that night.  
xXx  
Senji and I sat in Kari's office a week later, going over the pros and cons to each method Sherry had researched.  
"I really think you should let me grow your baby in the lab. I'll be able to observe every stage of development, keep an eye for anything going wrong..." She said. "And seriously, it is the safest to you both."  
Senji held me close.  
"It does sound easiest and most secure." He nodded.  
I sighed.  
Part of me had really wanted to carry my own child, but that wasn't possible for me. Ever.  
"Yes." I said.  
Kari pushed some papers towards us.  
"We're only recently able to do this, but I will need signatures from you both." She looked at Senji. "And some stuff from you."  
He sighed.  
"I guess so."  
"Unless you'd like to not be the father."  
He scowled at her.  
She held out a bag.  
"Better be quick about it. And read the directions through please."  
He sighed as he headed for the bathroom attached to her office.  
I know parts of this were very out of the ordinary.  
Like having no technicians to do the work for her.  
Not that she couldn't, she just knew we wanted this kept on a small level.  
Very few people should know about our baby.  
She looked at me.  
"You will be a good mother you know."  
I sighed.  
"No really. Ganta and Jude both think of you and Senji as parents and you've done right by all the little chicks in your life. Your whole crew is your family." She said.  
"I know. It'll just be a bit strange to finally have a baby of my own with Senji. After last time...I thought I might never have children." I said.  
She filled the rest of the papers out for us and filed them away as Senji came back out.  
"Good." She took the paper bag from him. "I'll go take care of this real quick." She said. "I'll see you both later at dinner, right?"  
Senji sighed. "Yeah."  
She let us out of her office and we watched her head back to her lab.  
Where she would be growing our baby in a container.  
It was a stupid thing to think about, but it was weird.  
Senji led me back out to the parking lot and opened my door for me.  
I got in the front seat of his car and he hurried to his side.  
He started the car before reaching to take my hand.  
"It doesn't matter how our child comes into the world, just that he does."  
"Or she." I nodded.  
He lifted my hand and kissed my knuckles as his phone went off.  
He growled under his breath as he answered.  
His face filled with worry as he pulled out of the lot.  
"We're on our way." Senji said. "Try and keep him awake."  
I frowned as he hung up.  
"Rei was helping Sherry charge up the motorcycle she was designing for him with some help from Karina and he overloaded the battery." I gasped. "It of course exploded on them, but Jude contained it. He didn't contain Cain who tried to calm Rei down. Rei was still overloaded on electricity and Cain took quite a shock."  
"Is he..."  
"No, his heart stopped, but Rei had enough juice left to shock it into beating again." Senji took a curve a bit too fast and it caught the attention of a traffic cop.  
He turned his lights on but Senji didn't stop.  
He followed us all the way back home.  
I ignored him as I jumped out of the car and rushed for the complex.  
Senji hurried to pull the door open, leaving the young cop to decide what to do.  
I ran over to where Sherry was leaning over Cain to try and keep him from passing out by aggravating him.  
She looked up as I knelt beside him.  
I put my hand over his chest as I pulled his button up shirt open.  
Rei sat shaking about ten feet away and Senji carefully moved to him.  
I tested Cain's heartbeat as the cop came in.  
His vitals seemed fine, but I cut my finger on my ring and dripped several drops of my blood into his mouth.  
He blinked at me.  
"Cain, can you hear me?" I asked.  
He reached for my hand and squeezed it weakly.  
"How do you feel?" I asked.  
"Tired." He said softly.  
"My blood is going to heal you from the inside, repairing the shock damage. It'll start hurting once it resets your nerves. Do you want painkillers?"  
He nodded and Sherry hurried to the medical box on the wall.  
She came back with a bottle of pills and dumped a couple out.  
He took them dry and then grimaced.  
His breathing was evening out and he closed his eyes.  
"He'll be fine with my blood and some rest." I said. "Senji, Jude." They came to me. "Get him to his bed."  
I moved towards Rei as he looked at the two picking Cain up.  
Cain was a big man, like his codename might imply.  
It was odd seeing Senji try to support the full weight of the heavily muscled man. But he managed. Sherry helped them as I sat beside Rei.  
"Rei?" I spoke as I reached to touch him.  
He shied away.  
"Rei, you're safe." I said soothingly.  
I touched his hand where it was wrapped around his knee.  
He looked at me.  
"I...I killed him." He looked on the verge of tears. "He...his heart stopped. I didn't mean to. I swear I never wanted to hurt him."  
I pulled him close to hold him.  
"I know Rei. It was an accident." I said.  
I felt tears hit my shirt.  
"Cain will be alright."  
"He's taken shocks from me before, not as bad, but he's never gone down like this."  
I frowned. "You shock him?"  
Rei pulled away slightly as he flushed. "When I...you know." He said.  
When he came. I nodded.  
"Depending on how strong, my shocks can get pretty violent." He said. "But Cain has never done this."  
I sighed as I ran my fingers through his spiky hair as I pulled him close again.  
"I think Cain has always used his Branch to ward off your electricity. He probably always keeps his Branch active like me, but he might not have reinforced it to take that level of shock." I said.  
"You think?" Rei sighed.  
I nodded. "Come on. He's going to be fine." I said as Senji and Jude came back out of the second floor room Rei shared with Cain.  
Senji sighed as he looked at me getting Rei to his feet.  
"He's pretty out right now. Maybe pain and the meds." He said.  
I nodded. I motioned to the cop still standing by the door confused as all hell.  
I stuck close to Rei as I led him upstairs.  
Sherry was just coming out of the room and held the door for us.  
Rei looked at his lover laying under the thick blanket of their bed.  
He hurried over and sat on the side.  
"He'll really be alright?" Rei asked.  
I nodded.  
I moved closer as Rei took Cain's hand.  
I stood beside the bed as I watched Cain come out of it.  
He held Rei's hand.  
"God I'm sorry Cain."  
"Shh." Cain said as he looked up at the younger man. "I'll be fine. I just didn't calculate first. I was worried about you."  
Rei sighed as he leaned over Cain to put his head on the other man's chest.  
Cain brushed his fingers through Rei's hair.  
"You scared me so much." Rei said.  
"I'm sorry." Cain mumbled.  
I could see him starting to doze off again.  
"Thanks." Cain said as I turned to leave.  
"For what?"  
"Saving me, bring Rei back to me." He said.  
I smiled. "Always." I closed the door as Rei shifted to lay beside Cain.  
Senji looked at me as I came down the stairs.  
"How're they?"  
"Cain came to and thanked me, Rei is calmed down, and now they are sleeping it off." I said.  
I glanced at the cop.  
"So everything is alright here?" He asked.  
"Yeah." Senji said. "Sorry for the scare. He was just kind of critical for a while."  
The cop nodded. "Well, try to keep your speeding under control."  
"Yeah." Senji sighed. "I'll probably get cussed out by Domon tonight."  
"You know him?"  
"You're new aren't you?" Jude asked.  
The young man nodded with a slight flush.  
"I was a cop before some stuff happened. Domon and those guys were my team." Senji rubbed his neck.  
"Ah. Well, I won't tell him."  
"He'll find out anyway. He's like a bloodhound with things you want kept secret." Senji shrugged.  
I moved to his side.  
Such a big scare today.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**  
It was mid evening before everyone showed up. Senji was just putting the steaks on the grill as my brother and Kari showed up.  
All of my team gave him the death stare and Senji's old team as they walked in too.  
"Look, we know what we did was wrong, but it had to be done." Domon said. "And everything worked out."  
Karako snorted. "By sheer dumb luck. You guys almost broke Fenix's heart. If Kari hadn't done her stupid thing then poor Fenix might still be a ghost in her room."  
Loki looked at the floor.  
Senji put his scythe to my brothers throat.  
"I seriously considered killing you a couple times just to make you hurt." Senji said.  
Loki looked at him. "Go ahead."  
"No." Senji pulled the scythe back. "You'd just come back anyway and it wouldn't serve a purpose."  
Loki sighed.  
Senji clenched his hand and I don't think my brother was expecting the punch.  
"If you ever hurt her like that again, we'll see just how immortal you are." Loki touched his jaw.  
"It's so damn stupid...we are." Loki said. I frowned. "No one has fucking noticed me in the past ten years, have they?"  
Senji moved to my side.  
"I've run some tests on myself." Loki said. "I'm not aging. I stopped aging when I was twenty nine. Fenix will likely stop aging too. As long as our blood still flows, which with the healing property it will, we won't ever die. We are truly immortal. We can't die, we won't age, we'll outlive all of you."  
I stared at him.  
The thought had my blood running cold.  
Outliving Senji.  
I looked up at him.  
I couldn't do that. I need him.  
Senji held me against him.  
Dinner was kind of dull after that. I brought a couple plates up to Cain and Rei.  
They weren't quite up to joining us, but I wanted them to eat.  
It was late by the time Senji and I headed for the house.  
xXx  
It was almost all the way through December when I stood in front of our bathroom mirror.  
I stared at myself. Twenty five today.  
Would I really stop aging?  
Would I outlive Senji?  
I moved to our room and sat on the bed.  
Senji pushed our door open.  
"Baby?" He closed the door.  
I couldn't look at him.  
For a second, all I pictured was him old and me still young. He was just too full of life.  
He should live as long as he wanted.  
He came to kneel in front of me.  
"Baby, what's wrong?" He took my hands.  
"I...I'm going to lose you Senji." I said. "You'll get older but I won't."  
He moved to sit on the bed and pulled me into his lap.  
"We'll get through this baby." He said.  
Maybe Kari was right, maybe a cure for what caused our skills was a good thing.  
I might not be able to heal with my blood, but I'd age and die with Senji.  
I'd have to ask her about it.  
Maybe my child would be able to heal and then I wouldn't be leaving the team totally without support.  
Senji brushed his fingers through my hair.  
I gripped his clean silk shirt.  
"We'll get over this problem together." He said. "I promised to always be here for you."  
I nodded.  
"It's just...I'm scared something might happen. What if something happens and you die?"  
Senji held me tight.  
"Nothing like that is going to happen." He said.  
"You can't promise that. Nothing like that is ever guaranteed."  
He sighed.  
"Then I'll do my best."  
He held me for a bit longer.  
"Everyone is waiting for you to come down." He said.  
I nodded and slid from his lap.  
I went to the dresser to pull a soft green skirt on and a dark gold sweater over my camisole.  
Senji came up behind me, radiating warmth as he held me against his chest.  
"Baby, push those thoughts far from your head. Everyone came to celebrate your birthday." He said. "We planned to party until Christmas with you."  
I sighed.  
I let him turn me around and kiss me.  
"Come on." He tugged me to the door.  
xXx  
I sat at the table after New Years, still going over all the gifts everyone had gotten me for my birthday and Christmas.  
Senji set a glass in front of me and I frowned.  
"Drink." He said.  
I took a sip of the thick milkshake.  
Chocolate, my favorite.  
He sat beside me with his own peanut butter one.  
"What's the matter baby?" He asked.  
"I'm glad most everyone gave me gift cards, but I'm still worried about how to give back some." I said.  
"Mine." He sighed.  
"It's not that I don't like it Senji, it's just..."  
"You're scared. I don't mind you giving it to someone else baby. I'll get you something else. I just thought after all the things we've been through, a private beach for a week sounded pretty nice."  
"I want to go, but I don't want to fly."  
Senji pulled me against him.  
"We can take the train down there, and then catch the boat."  
I looked at him.  
"You don't like trains." I said.  
"I'd rather you be happy. I just think it'll take longer." He shrugged.  
"You're sure?"  
He nodded.  
"Then..." I leaned to kiss him. "Thank you Senji."  
He flushed slightly.  
xXx  
The team didn't even bat an eye at the news that we'd be gone for nine days.  
Cain waved us off.  
"We've got it covered."  
Senji nodded.  
"Nagi has led before, so I think if anyone starts panicking, he'll be the one in charge, with Karako taking over if he's the one panicking." Senji said.  
Senji and I got Clara to drop us off at the train station on her way to work.  
The plan was to take the trip down, wander the city until our boat was ready, and then just relax at the private beach house for a while.  
I knew Senji didn't care for trains, but he took it well as we got moving.  
He settled in against the window on the bench under it.  
The small cabin had a bench on three sides of the room and a rack above it.  
We managed to get lucky enough that no one else came in.  
As I stood at the door after I closed it, he looked up at me.  
"Come here."  
He held his left hand out to me in invitation.  
I took it and he pulled me to his lap.  
I settled in, my legs stretched out over his, feeling so small compared to him.  
His arms went around me as he pulled his coat over us both to be a blanket of sorts.  
"Get some rest baby."  
I nodded and turned my head to kiss him.  
I loved when he kissed me, knowing that such an action wasn't common from him before me in his life.  
His friends had teased him about kissing me in front of people, but because he knew I liked it, he continued anyway.  
I dozed off with my head on his shoulder.  
xXx  
I woke at Senji's voice.  
"Yeah, I guess."  
"Thanks, everywhere else is a bit crowded." The man said.  
I cracked an eye to see the older gentleman sit by the door.  
He looked harmless as he folded his coat and set it beside him.  
I closed my eyes again.  
I had somehow not woken up to Senji shifting us to where he was laying on his back with me snuggled on top of him.  
"Is that your girl?" The man asked.  
"Wife." Senji pulled his jacket around me from where it had started to slip to the floor.  
"She's very pretty. You're quite a lucky man." The man sounded like he smiled. "That emblem on your coat looks quite familiar."  
"It's Even Edge." Senji didn't often bring it up around civilians.  
"Ah, I thought so. A young woman and man helped the police arrest a Deadman recently running a trafficking operation across the street from my shop. They wore jackets with that burned on."  
"It's a code for Deadmen to start running." Senji said. "Anyone who has ever heard of the Carnival Corpse should have heard of Crow and knows how strong and violent he is in a fight. And they would have heard that Phoenix really is immortal and brings herself back to life and heals."  
"Yes, I watched several of those fights when the videos were released. Brutal business, such a disgusting thing. The level of contempt I feel for the people who enjoyed watching those is indescribable. To pit two people against each other in a death fight is wrong no matter the crimes they committed."  
Senji huffed. "Well, I can't entirely complain. Thanks to those fights, I made quite a reputation both in and out of prison. And I never would have met my wife without them."  
"You...are Crow?"  
"Yeah."  
"And she is Phoenix?"  
Senji nodded. "No need to fear though, we don't hurt people."  
The man laughed. "I'd think not. Your little company seems quite dedicated to helping law enforcement handle the new problems we seem to be having. I'm just glad to have met you here."  
I could feel Senji tense.  
"See, my grandson...he's turning twelve this year, but his...gift...is getting harder to contain."  
"He's a Deadman?" Senji asked.  
"Yes. He can use his blood to put people to sleep. Lately, it seems like every time he gets a scrape or a cut when he's in his soccer practice, it goes out on its own and the coach is getting a bit irritated with him. It's bad enough that he is getting considered for being dropped from the team. And he loves his soccer."  
Senji sighed. "Yeah, puberty and the abilities do seem to not correspond well to each other. I was just a bit lucky I was done with the worst of it before getting my ability during the quake."  
"I was wondering...if your company would be able to help him. Not work or anything, but surely you have some way of training him to use his ability better?"  
Senji shrugged slightly. "I'm more combat myself, but Karako and Nagi are good at teaching. Nagi is particularly good with kids."  
Such a liar. Senji was wonderful with kids, and Ganta said he was a good teacher if a bit unorthodox.  
The man sighed. "I would love to bring him to you all for help if you don't mind."  
"It's fine. I'm sure Nagi would love to help him." Senji said. He gave the man the address for the complex and Nagi's number.  
"Thank you. It won't be for at least another couple of weeks unfortunately. I have to get someone to run the shop and get his parents to fill out forms for him to be out of school for a bit."  
Senji nodded. "Just make sure you call before dropping by to make sure Nagi is there."  
"Of course."  
I drifted off again as they continued talking.  
xXx  
Senji carefully woke me up as the train slowed to a stop.  
"Baby?" He eased me upright.  
I rubbed at my eyes.  
I heard the older man getting up and started to stand up.  
Senji settled his jacket over my shoulders and I slipped my arms through his sleeves.  
The cuffs hung off my hands by a good few inches, but it was warm from us both.  
Senji reached to grab our bags.  
I pulled my hair from the jacket and rolled the sleeves up as the hem brushed the bottom of my calves.  
We started off the train as he slung his backpack over his shoulder to hold my hand.  
My small duffle bag looked slightly out of place in his hands, being pale blue and decorated with patches from an anime. Sherry had picked it for me saying the character was a lot like me. I had watched a couple episodes, and it was kind of funny. But I hadn't seen the character she said reminded her of me.  
Senji led me to the lobby and outside to the setting sun.  
"Do you want to just head for the hotel?" He asked as he flagged down a cab.  
"Maybe find dinner after we check in." I nodded as he opened the door for me.  
He told the driver the hotel name as he pulled his seatbelt on.  
The drive was short and I pointed out a restaurant that sounded good.  
We got out and he grabbed our bags again as I paid the driver.  
He led me into the hotel lobby and up to the counter.  
Getting checked in was easy enough, I took the card for our room and went up to the second floor with Senji.  
He left our bags on the bed and I pulled my own jacket out of my bag to give him his back.  
Senji undid the sleeves as I was settling my hair.  
"Nothing better than pulling on a warm jacket." He said.  
I nodded.  
We headed out to find that restaurant again.  
xXx  
The boat ride out to the island was peaceful.  
Our private cabin was bigger than I had thought it to be.  
But not huge enough to not be a cabin in my mind.  
The owner of the cabin and boat had given Senji all the contact information he might need as I stared at the cabin on the tiny island.  
I turned as he got the boat back out to open water.  
Senji came to me and held me for a moment.  
We got in with the keys Senji had gotten.  
The first day was somewhat uneventful other than hot sex with a view of the beach.  
The following ones took a similar pattern.  
Just relaxation in the sand and sun.  
It was very nice.  
But not enough to distract me from the problem of possibly outliving Senji.  
xXx  
Life continued as normal for everyone for a good couple months.  
Jude got the papers stating that we were now his parents.  
Karako and Nagi had announced their engagement the same night Shindo and Karina did.  
Both were waiting until summer to get married.  
It was White Day when I finally got the answers I was looking for to my problem.  
Senji and I just pulled in the driveway from visiting the hospital to check on our baby.  
I saw Loki look up at us from the steps.  
Senji got out as I did and moved to the door first.  
"What's up Loki?" Senji frowned.  
"Kari and I were talking...now that she understands the parasites in our blood giving us these abilities." He stood up as I came up with the bag of cookie ingredients we had picked up before the hospital.  
Senji unlocked the front door and headed inside.  
"Come in Lo." I said.  
He nodded.  
Ever since he had announced our immortality, he'd been distant to us both.  
I closed the door and headed in to the kitchen where Senji was washing his hands.  
Loki followed as Senji dried his hands and started to gather what he'd need for shortbread cookies.  
He had been teaching me how to really cook since we'd gotten back from our vacation.  
I sat at the table to watch him.  
Seeing him from behind never got boring.  
He shook his head as his bangs fell in his face.  
Definitely time for a haircut though.  
Loki moved to sit beside me.  
"I'm...sorry Fe. For all the shit I've done to you. All I really wanted was to keep you safe and it came out wrong." He said.  
I sighed.  
"I hurt you without even thinking about you having kids another way because I was being selfish. I didn't want to risk losing the only family I have."  
Senji held the bowl as he faced us and kept mixing.  
"If Kari hadn't done what she did for science, I would have effectively killed you myself, I realize that. I never should have done that, but I was just blinded by not wanting to lose you."  
"She forced Rei to shock me to keep me from coming after your ass." Senji said as he tested the consistency.  
I watched him reach for a little flour and mixed it in.  
"I'm really sorry." Loki said. "And for scaring you about outliving Senji." He said to me.  
I looked at the table.  
"Kari told me how you had asked her about a way to remove your healing gift so that you'd age and die with him." Senji gripped the bowl tight and the spoon tighter. Enough to break the handle.  
"Sorry, cheap wood." He mumbled as he scraped the dough from it and threw it away after licking it clean. I watched him pull a new one from the drawer. It wasn't unusual for him to break the cheap utensils. We were using those up until we finally got to the set Domon had gotten us for Christmas that were quality wood with a lifetime warrenty.  
Loki sighed. "Guess you didn't discuss that first...I'm sorry Fe. Kari told me and I just couldn't let her do it. Not because I want you to hurt if Senji dies without you, but because we discovered something even more astounding about this thing in our blood."  
I looked at him.  
"What is in our blood isn't a bug or anything living. Hell, we barely have white cells anymore." Loki said. "What is taking the place of our white cells, are molecular robots. Really science fiction, I know." He pulled out his phone and scrolled through his pictures. "Kari and I were looking at a dissection of two of your eggs when we noticed something odd. One had both red and white cells, but the other only had red. Instead of white cells, it looked like tiny pieces of metal under the microscope. I touched the reforming egg and did what I had done to you by introducing a drop of my own blood with the intent of making it not reform."  
I frowned as he showed me pictures.  
Senji dumped the bowl out on the counter onto the wooden cutting board.  
I looked up at him.  
"It worked and we found out that while most Deadman can't reprogram the nano bots, I can. For some reason, when I put so much focus into my training to even bring back the dead, I had opened my own bots to the ability to be commanded in a different way. When I bring others back from the dead I reprogram their bots with my own to revive them, then, once they succeed, they reset the bots again to their function setting prior to my commanding."  
"What about what you did for my team?" Senji asked as he dug in the drawer for a cookie cutter. "I'm pretty damn sure they aren't Deadmen."  
"No, in those cases, it's my own bots having to do the reviving. They rebuild damaged cells and reactivate them as needed until the person is healed or revived." Loki said. "Hence why I used so much of my own blood when I brought them back. For Owl and the others from his old group, it was easier since they were already Deadmen."  
Senji sighed as he rolled the dough out and began cutting shapes out of it.  
I stared at him.  
"My point in all this Fe, is that with my ability to reprogram...I can make any Deadman immortal."  
I blinked as I took that in.  
I watched Senji pause and just stared at his body, not quite seeing him.  
Senji, living as long as I did...that was something I hadn't considered.  
Would he even want that though?  
I pushed out of my chair and moved to stand behind Senji.  
I put my head against his back and my arms around his waist.  
He put his left hand over my hands and kept working with his right.  
"How...painful would this process be?" Senji asked.  
"Well...I've never tried it. I got the theory down and then I started working on a way to make non Deadmen either into us or just alter them as well."  
"You want to make Kari immortal too." Senji said.  
"Yeah...I asked her to marry me yesterday at dinner with her parents. Her father had helped me by giving me their family ring for her."  
I sighed as Senji had to pull his hand away to finish with pressing the last bit of dough he could into a cookie shape.  
I moved away and looked at them.  
I smiled as I looked at the heart shaped shortbread cookie dough on the pan.  
He moved to put the pan in the oven he had turned on before starting to cut.  
Then he turned to face my brother.  
"I'll...let you test it on me, but not today. I need a bit of preparation." He said.  
Loki nodded. "Of course. You will need to make yourself look exactly how you want forever because once I reprogram your bots, you'll never be able to change anything until you've mastered complete control of your body again and you can force your own bots to accept changes."  
"And would I be able to make others immortal too?"  
"I suppose with a lot of training you could." Loki nodded. "It took me years to work on just what was in my blood, then the whole rest of this time had been spent getting perfect control. Unless I program it into yours that you can't ever unlock that ability. That they will listen to you up until the point in which they enter someone else."  
"Go ahead and do that. Make me self healing, but not able to heal others. I'm not a healer." Senji said.  
"Our ability is very hard to learn. We have to be able to read the signals from another body to know exactly where to best and most effectively put our focus in healing. Otherwise our bots would go around fixing everything." Loki nodded.  
He stood up.  
"I'll be waiting for you to call me." He said.  
Senji nodded as he moved to hold me.  
Loki headed out of the house and I saw him start walking.  
I guess he was still staying with Clara and Kan.  
Senji wrapped his arms around me.  
"So you were really that bothered by it?" Senji spoke quietly.  
I put my hands over his. "I'm sorry Senji. I didn't want to hurt you, but I just didn't want you to know until Kari got done researching."  
He sighed. "I get it, I do. But Fenix, this was something big. You should have told me about it. I will support you no matter what. I hate that you considered giving up your ability to always watch over our child just to die with me. I love you and I always will, but don't you ever think about giving up your life just because I'm not around anymore. If our child isn't immortal, then you can debate it long after our line is dead because I want you to always be there for our family." He said.  
I looked at the floor.  
"I'm sorry."  
He turned me around.  
"If Loki's method doesn't end up working, I still don't ever want you thinking about it. When I'm gone, you need to be there for them. Don't you ever leave our family without someone who will love them unconditionally." He said.  
I nodded as I felt the tears slip.  
He leaned down to kiss them away.  
"I think it'll work, and then we can both be there to harass our family forever."  
Senji leaned to kiss me.  
I pressed against him as he held me tight.  
I was just feeling a little hazy from a lack of air when he pulled away at the sound of the buzzer.  
"Damn, you distracted me." He mumbled.  
He moved to put on the mitt and pull the pan out of the oven.  
It filled the room with such a delicious scent.  
I stepped back to the table as he set the pan to cool while gathering the milk and white chocolate bits to melt in bowls in the microwave.  
I watched as he poured the different chocolates into bags and cut of a tiny part of a corner.  
I smiled as I watched him decorate the cookies with chocolate.  
He was halfway done when the front door opened.  
The alarm Sherry had set up hadn't gone off, so I wasn't surprised to hear her and Karako laughing as they came in.  
"Well, at least we know Senji is home." Karako said.  
Sherry laughed. "Honey, we're home!" She called out.  
I saw Senji stifle a laugh as he finished while shaking his head.  
They found it amusing to harass him. I think the people of our group had gotten a bit used to the once violent and deadly Crow being a soft plushy homebody.  
He rarely went on missions unless his old team requested him specifically, and he did spend quite a bit of time at both our house and the complex taking care of paperwork and making sure things were kept tidy.  
The girls made their way into the kitchen and paused as they saw us.  
"Oooh, finally got him to make cookies again did you?" Karako sat beside me.  
"It was his idea actually." I said. Sherry moved to see what he was doing.  
"Awe, so sweet." She teased.  
He flushed slightly at the back of his neck and shooed her away.  
He took a plate to set some of the finished cookies on before collecting up some milk in several cups before bringing them to the table.  
I watched as he set the plate down.  
Sherry was right, it was very cute.  
Who could have imagined a man as terrifying as Senji by reputation would not only make heart shaped cookies, but then decorate them with such frivolous designs like lace too.  
I carefully picked up the most pretty cookie of the bunch and stared at it for a moment.  
I pulled my phone out to take a picture of it against the dark wood of our table.  
Senji took one of his cookies as well as I picked mine back up to nibble it.  
It was so good.  
Karako and Sherry took some too.  
"You are way too good for your own good Senji." Karako said.  
"Screw off." He mumbled around a bite of his cookie.  
"Keep this stuff up and no one will believe the old Crow is still in there." Sherry said.  
Senji huffed. "I'll do another mission then, keep reminding people that I'm still a vicious bastard when I want to be."  
Karako shrugged. "Hey, did you hear the news?"  
I frowned.  
"So, while we were out, we heard a couple people talking about it. Apparently some local Deadmen are setting up something similar to the old Carnival Corpse."  
Senji scowled. "Then they must have never been in it."  
"I think not, but I was overhearing who I thought might be one of the people helping to set it up. Not a Deadman, but some mixed martial arts fighter who was giving advice to two Deadmen about how to go about it."  
I shuddered.  
"No, get this." Karako held up another cookie. "We're sitting in the restaurant mind you, and I'm listening to them a couple booths away. So they want to set it up to be similar, but not deadly, like classic pro fighting." She said.  
Sherry nodded. "They want to get Deadmen to fight each other in a friendly kind of competition. Find out who the best is in a way, but get money and support for the good Deadmen too." Sherry explained.  
Karako finished her bite. "I was thinking about it, and the fighter even said it, but they don't have either the resources or support to set something like that up. Plus, the chances of injury is pretty high and they don't have a healer. So I was debating it, but what if Even Edge sponsors? With a local setup like we have, the building space for a place to fight in-"  
"No." Senji said.  
They both stopped.  
I looked at Senji. He hated the very thought of the Carnivals now, even if they had brought him so much.  
I touched his hand.  
"Think about it this way, if we did help them set it up, we could control it. I can heal and you can help prevent a fight to the death by being the mediator. Plus, we could be scouting for people to join Even Edge. It would be the best way to ensure that we don't get just random people off the street." I said.  
He sighed as Karako nodded.  
"Can you find these people again?" He asked her.  
"Absolutely. We tracked them down to an old abandoned warehouse where they were trying to set up." She said.  
"Good, head out and bring them in. I think Cain and Rei are in their place if you want to get them to tag along for backup."  
Sherry nodded. "Probably a good idea to have some muscle with us, since I'm no fighter."  
Karako nodded.  
They took a few more cookies and Senji frowned at them as they headed out.  
I ate another cookie as he got up to put things away.  
"These are good." I said.  
"I hoped so. You did want them. I've never tried this recipe before." He said.  
We started to head for the living room when we heard the car Karako drove pull out followed by the two custom motorcycles Karina and Sherry had worked on.  
She had finally gotten the proper method to tell how charged the batteries were so Rei didn't overload them again.  
I sighed at the sight of Cain and Rei riding.  
Senji had mentioned wanting one too when they had gotten done.  
I was still nervous about him riding. I couldn't stop Cain or Rei.  
But I guess now that Loki might be able to make him immortal too, I couldn't stop him.  
I watched them leave as Senji pulled me into his lap on the couch to settle in for the movie he put on.  
I snuggled against him and tried to ignore the nagging thought that something might go wrong.  
xXx  
I was right to ignore it for a week.  
Loki stepped away from where Senji was laying on the couch as my husband curled up from the pain of having damaged cells repaired on a massive scale.  
I knelt beside the couch and reached to touch his hand.  
He opened his eyes and looked at me.  
"Did it hurt this fucking bad when you became a Deadman?" He asked.  
I nodded.  
He groaned and Loki moved forward to touch his shoulder.  
"It's almost done." He said.  
I watched Senji for another few moments before he relaxed and turned to his back.  
I jolted as Loki pulled his pocket knife out and stabbed Senji in the arm.  
"Fucking hell dammit." Senji pulled away.  
But his wound healed up instantly and he groaned.  
"Good, it does work." Loki sighed.  
"I would hope so."  
"But...are you immortal is the question?"  
Senji glared at him.  
"I'll find out later thank you."  
"It would be best to do it while I'm here to fix the problems." Loki said.  
I stood up.  
I couldn't possibly watch Senji die just for a test.  
I turned to leave the room as Senji nodded.  
I was just headed on the stairs when I heard my brother use his knife again.  
I shuddered as everything stopped for me.  
When I heard Senji take a breath again and push my brother away, I dropped to the carpet on the stairs.  
"Alright, you've proven it, go have your fun elsewhere."  
Senji got up and I couldn't move.  
I finally felt myself breathe again as he came to the stairs and picked me up.  
"I'm alright baby." He said.  
I gripped his shirt.  
Yes, he was alright.  
I could feel his heartbeat under my fingers.  
Things would be okay now.  
xXx  
It was a good month before Senji had gotten the two Deadmen who were trying to set up a fight arena to quit trying to do it by themselves.  
He had finally convinced them after a vicious attack by a violent Deadman nearly killed one of their peaceful volunteers.  
If Senji and Rei and Cain hadn't jumped in that arena, the poor guy might be dead.  
I had managed to heal him up pretty well.  
The two had a pretty interesting talent with their blood being able to manipulate other non-Deadmen with their blood.  
It was a scary ability, but didn't work on Deadmen.  
I figured because of the bots in our blood.  
Senji had gotten a place set up for any Deadmen who wanted to come and train and practice safe combat with people who could teach them how to use their powers better.  
It was almost June when Kari called while I was watching over where Senji was teaching a boy who had the same ability as his Crow Claw.  
Sherry had begun a reclassification of the different types of abilities as we came across them.  
Bladed skills and whips like Karina had and things similar to Nagi's were most common.  
We got several people who flew from out of country to come train.  
I looked down at Senji as he showed the boy how to block projectiles with help from Ganta.  
Senji looked up at me as I waved at him.  
He got himself away from the kids and headed up the stairs leading down to the large arena.  
I held up the phone as he came close.  
He took it.  
"Yeah?"  
Kari spoke and his face softened.  
He pulled me close.  
"Alright. We'll be on our way in a minute."  
I smiled as he motioned Nagi up.  
The other man pardoned himself from the Deadmen he was teaching combat techniques for his style to.  
"Hey, we have to go to the hospital, so make sure everything is shut down by six, alright?" Senji asked.  
Nagi nodded. "Yeah. I'll have this place cleared out by then."  
Senji put his arm around my waist and we headed for the door.  
xXx  
I looked at the chamber Kari was emptying.  
My baby boy was about to take his first breath.  
I watched as she reached into the chamber and took hold of him.  
She pulled him out and wrapped him up before handing him to me.  
I almost jolted when he drew in a full breath and let out a cry.  
Senji put his arm around my shoulders as he put his other hand on our son's forehead.  
His soft black curls looked so much like Senji's.  
But when he opened his eyes, we saw my eyes.  
The same darker skin from Senji, but definitely my facial features.  
He was wonderful.  
"So...are you guys happy?" Kari asked.  
"Deliriously." I nodded.  
"Good. Loki and I collected some things you'd be needing to start with. He'll need a particular diet to wean from the solution he developed in, but I got you more than enough for that process, just make sure you read my directions carefully." She said. "He'll be fine until tonight without any formula, but at eight or so, he'll need some. Loki and I will be over before then with everything, so don't worry."  
"Is he..." Senji started to speak. "No, it doesn't matter."  
"He's a Deadman, right from the get go. I already tested him. He doesn't have quite the same level of self healing speed, but Loki said he does have it. And he can do the blades like you Senji. But Loki did put a suppression on it until he is at least five. I know we should have asked permission, but we didn't want him to hurt himself."  
I shook my head. "That is fine. You guys were right. Boys are known to get hurt."  
Senji scoffed. "At least he has the healing."  
"And the immortality." Kari said.  
I frowned. "You tested?"  
"Not intentionally." She looked horrified. "Last month we had a bit of an accident like I said before, but I hadn't realized at the time that his chamber had gotten shut down when the circuit blew. I came in after almost ten hours to find his chamber shut down and when I started it back up, I was so scared we'd lost him. Loki was ready to bring him back if he needed to. But he was alive still. His heart started beating and everything went fine again after that. I'm sorry I didn't tell you."  
I think I'd stick to having one child.  
She got us out of there fairly quickly with him.  
I sat in the front seat of Senji's car as he cried in the carrier Kari had given us.  
He was so tiny.  
Senji sat beside me as he reached for my hand.  
"What should we call him?"  
"Tatsu." I said.  
He nodded. "Our baby dragon." He laughed and his son quieted. "Now I feel left out."  
I frowned.  
"Phoenix, Dragon, and a poor little Crow."  
I smiled as I twined my fingers with his.  
"You are anything but ordinary Senji."  
He grinned. "I know. I have you after all. I had to be something for that right?"  
I nodded. "You are a very special man."  
Senji pulled out of the parking lot and we headed to the house.  
xXx  
It was almost half past seven by the time Loki and Kari pulled in the driveway.  
I looked up from the couch where I was holding Tatsu as Karako pulled the door open.  
Our son hadn't cried since hearing Senji laugh in the car.  
It was as if he seemed to realize that he had absolutely nothing to ever fear.  
Loki came in carrying most of the bags until Nagi came to help him.  
Kari took one and moved to the kitchen where Senji was working on dinner for our crew.  
Others had joined Even Edge, but the original group would always be our Crew.  
Cain and Rei set up the bigger table as Senji turned the oven off and I started to get up, holding Tatsu close.  
Everyone piled into the kitchen and Senji and the boys put dinner on the table with the drinks.  
Kari made up a warm bottle of the special formula for me and brought it to me as Loki pulled her chair out beside me.  
Senji watched me feed Tatsu and everyone ate quietly.  
"Welcome to your new crazy family." Senji brushed his son's cheek and he closed his eyes as he turned his head towards his fathers hand.  
We were a family.  
No matter what or who tried to separate us, this table was family.  
This child was going to have the best to call his family.  
No one was going to pick on him when he went to school.  
No one would ever think to, knowing who and what his parents were.  
All my worries narrowed to common fears. Nothing serious.  
Would he get hurt as a little boy?  
How many times was he going to chase after the big guys thinking he could keep up until he could?  
Was Senji going to really be able to teach him how to use Crow Claw when he was older? For good.  
Was he ever going to question why his parents didn't age?  
How long would he really be my baby?  
Those didn't really matter as I fed him his bottle and Senji fed me bits of steak from his plate.  
This was something I would never lose.  
And really, I had Loki to thank. Had he not thrown himself between me and that concrete ceiling, I'd never have been able to meet Senji and have our baby Tatsu.  
 **Epilogue**  
Five and a half years and I wouldn't get used to seeing Senji run around the yard with Jude and Ganta, roughhousing.  
I watched Tatsu edge in towards where Senji had gotten Jude in a headlock.  
Loki had used his immense power to make our initial seven members immortal.  
Cain, Rei, Sherry, Jude, Karako, Nagi, and Ganta.  
He had learned how to turn a normal person into a Deadman and turned Kari into a healer like us and immortal as well.  
I clenched my hand on the railing of the back porch as Senji let Jude go and the boy stumbled back.  
Man now. It was hard to think of the kid who had once called Senji 'dad' on accident being a man and actually getting ready to marry Sherry.  
Cain and Rei had gotten the paperwork filed and signed without a fancy thing. Just a small party at home.  
Karako moved to stand beside me holding her year old baby.  
She had taken a good while off her job to have her baby and care for her for a few months.  
Now I babysat in the mornings and Karako and Nagi were home by mid afternoon from the local jobs they did.  
I leaned on the railing, just getting ready to call out to the boys when Nagi ran off the porch to join them, picking Tatsu up as he went.  
My son loved it as he was tossed to Senji and his father acted as if he had tackled him.  
They were all so good with the kids that it was hard to imagine anyone hating Even Edge because these were ruthless fighters and cold hearted bastards.  
I laughed as Senji threw him in the air and Jude used a refined aspect of his power to keep him floating.  
Tatsu loved it.  
These were his uncles, his father, they would never let him hit the ground.  
Senji caught him as Jude dropped him and my husband carried our son back to me on the porch.  
Tatsu reached to be put down and Senji set him on his feet to run inside as he saw Loki through the back door.  
Senji leaned in to kiss me as Karako went out where her husband was talking with Ganta and Jude.  
"I love you Senji." I mumbled against his lips.  
"I'll love you forever Fenix."  
He pulled me against him and kissed me senseless.  
Nothing would ever beat the feeling of being loved.


End file.
